Berina- fate in their favour
by Jenko83
Summary: Set exactly after the episode closure of S19 ep7 'the last kill'. After the door is unlocked what happens next. There are feelings of fear and nerves and the obvious undeniable sexual chemistry. Will the gods, or someone else, smile on them and let fate take course This is my first attempt at a fan fic any feedback welcome. Some M parts... will highlight when they are coming up.
1. Chapter 4

The door to Bernie's flat swung open and she held the door open for Serena and followed in once Serena was in the hallway. Serena smiled as she found that Bernie was quite chivalrous in a way, people always associated chivalry with men given its history, but here was Bernie fitted this bracket perfectly. Maybe it was because of the army, she would call it 'having your back', she had in the past when she was sent to AAU when Serena returned from her suspension; she used it as her justification for accepting the post; better her than someone who wasn't going to have her back. Serena liked, no, loved this; feeling protected and special.

Bernie's flat was much like her trauma unit, _cold and a little clinical… well less clinical, more practical_ Serena pondered. It was a new style flat, laminate flooring, smooth surfaces, minimalistic. This was the kind of place that served a purpose. Base camp. Serena did notice the lack of photographs, ornaments, just stuff. Maybe again it was the army, you don't take 2 suitcases and push your luck on hand luggage when going on tour, so maybe that is how she was. No bad thing in Serena's eyes, just different, opposite to her really. But opposites is good. They had a lot in common but then the differences is what made them click, both in the hospital and outside of it.

Bernie had moved through to the kitchen as she was holding a bag full of food they had picked up en route. Her flat was freezing given that it had stood empty while she was away. She clicked on the heating, "Sorry the flat is a bit cold, I pretty much got back and came to work so….." She said apologetically. Serena followed her through to the kitchen, she was slightly surprised this was also tidy. Bernie must have read her thoughts as she said, "I know what you are thinking, why can't I be this tidy in our office? Well to be honest you caught me on a good day. I, through frustration at fucking up," throwing her hands up and indicating to her and Serena, "I took out my frustration on the flat and cleaned it before I went away also thinking I did not want to come back to a shit hole as well as all the other crap."

Serena laughed as Bernie plated up the food "I may have no food in the house but there is always drink, what do you want?" as if she didn't know the answer! "Help yourself" and she pointed to where the wine and glasses were kept. Serena headed for the Shiraz, "What are you having darling?" Serena asked, Bernie pointed at the fridge, "there are some beers in the fridge, I'l have one of those, if I go on the red I am afraid I might be asleep within 15 minutes." Serena fixed the drinks and saw that the fridge had a couple of photos attached with magnets. Charlotte and Cam, one from the army as it was a big group photo of 20 or so people in fatigues and one of her and Bernie in Albies, It was a photo she didn't know was taken, it wasn't posed it was a caught moment and they both looked so happy as the photo showed they were laughing heavily with glasses in hand. She thought she must ask about the picture as Bernie bought the plates to the table.

They sat eating Italian takeaway, Serena had never heard of this Italian takeaway before and was surprised she didn't know about it. She was actually impressed, not as good as home cooked food but what food that came in a foil tray was? But to be fair it was pretty damn good, she thought it was definitely a takeaway ran by Italians, not some guy from Dagenham called Lou calling himself Luigi. "Bern this is lovely, how did you come across it?"

Bernie looked up from her food and said, "I don't really do domestic, I live off M&S meal deals and takeaways, but I have standards."

They both cleared their plates and Bernie swept them off the table into the sink.

Bernie sat down again and moved her chair close to Serena's. "Hi"

Serena laughed "Hello you."

They looked at each other and moved in for a deep longing kiss, now that the tedium of work and eating had been dealt with the most important thing was this now.

After several minutes of kissing they both came up for air. Bernie smiled, she had never been so happy as she was now in this flat, the flat that to her was just a place to lay her head and store her belongings suddenly had life breathed into it. Their foreheads connected as Serena stated, "We should start the unpacking Major!"

"Um yes, yes unpacking, next task."

"How can I help?"

"Ok, um, top ups," She signalled at drinks, "…and" She pulled something from the rear pocket of her trousers, "You can be in charge of entertainment, pick us some music."

Bernie did a few swipes and presses on the I Pod and passed it to Serena. Serena took the I Pod and scrolled through the artists and playlists, there was a lot there.

"Wow, you have eclectic tastes, there is a lot here."

"Yeah, not really a TV person, love music, always a song to fit an occasion." Bernie said casually as she had gathered her Army rucksack from the hall and was unceremoniously throwing items into the washing machine occasionally chucking the odd white shirt to the other side. Serena watched in horror at this casual method of sorting the washing. It seems there was 2 washes… whites and everything else! Serena had a light wash, dark wash, colours, whites, delicates, towels and bedding; as well as the ad hoc washes that went on in between.

She was still scrolling through the I Pod at loss because she had not heard of half of the artists or songs, she decided to swipe to 'most played' and put that on. This way Bernie would be happy with the music selection and she would be able to learn something about the woman she was almost certain she loved.

By the time Serena had selected a playlist the washing was sorted, the white was pushed to the corner by the washer ready to replace the 'everything else' wash when it finished. Bernie had moved on and pulled a toiletries bag from the rucksack and just placed it in the windowsill of the bathroom. She then pulled a tin from the bag. To Serena it looked like a Christmas biscuit tin that had seen better days. Bernie opened the tin and tipped the contents, which seemed like coins, pens, chargers, paperwork and other miscellany into the top draw in the kitchen. Serena imagined that this was something that Bernie would call the 'Shit drawer', it was an expression she had heard but she herself didn't have one, not least because Jason simply would not allow that amount of disorder. She then pulled a couple of pairs of trainers from the bag and placed these, along with the bag in a cupboard in the hallway.

"Well that's the unpacking done, what music did you decide on?"


	2. Chapter 5

Serena eyed Bernie as Bernie stood and took a swig from her beer bottle and then started to move and caught Serena's hand, "Come on you, living room."

Serena was still in shock, firstly the extent of her packing was a bloody rucksack and it took all of 5 minutes to unpack. If it was the other way around she would take that long getting her bags into the living room.

"Have you gone to my most listened to list?" Bernie said knowing that Serena seemed to be thinking about something.

"Yea, yes, most played, thought I could learn a thing or too. But seriously, unpacking, I thought you wanted help?"

Bernie laughed as they sat on the sofa, Bernie automatically putting her arm around Serena.

As if from nowhere Serena added a thought, "Where the bloody hell is the music coming from anyway."

"Blue tooth speakers" Bernie chuckled, "Is it a bit too 21st century for you Ms Campbell."

They sat for a minute just appreciating each other's proximity.

"So, if I'm not here to help with unpacking, what am I here to help with?" Serena mused with a little flirtation in her voice

"Well, um… do I need an excuse?" Bernie asked as she wound her fingers around Serena's fingers.

"No, no course not but you kind of said you needed help and I assumed with the unpacking but help with something all the same."

Bernie smiled and they kissed before Bernie could actually respond.

They were interrupted by Serena's phone going off, it was Jason. They both knew before she had even put her hands to her phone. Jason had his own ring tone, the Dr Who theme tune. Jason's choice of course, Serena had agreed as it did help because she knew she had to answer if that stupid sequence of notes started to chime because a) it was Jason and b) crikey, it needs to be stopped. Serena found her phone "Do you mind?"

Bernie shook her head and signalled to the kitchen as she rose from the sofa. She went in and ran the water into the sink and added washing up liquid. Not her usual style but she figured the opportunity was there as she could hear Serena trying to reason with Jason over something, she wasn't sure what but more than likely it was a trivial matter that Jason had taken far too seriously. Bless him, Bernie did have a soft spot for him as he viewed the world in a one dimensional kind of way and he deduced that 'Bernie and Auntie Serena' wasn't a bad thing, so he was alright in her book.

By the time she had processed these thoughts the dishes, few what they were, were done, dried and put away. She opened the back door as she could still hear Serena talking to Jason, she wanted to feel the crisp winter air to give her some clarity. Serena was here… willingly. Had you asked 48 hours ago when she was collecting her bag from arrivals she would not have imagined this. She was half expecting the frostiest of cold shoulders from Serena and evils from those around her for hurting, damaging, someone as wonderful as her. This took her back to her mantra, the one that played on a loop, willing her not to fuck it up again. _Don't screw it up, don't rush her. This one is a keeper, don't scare her away._ _As she stood in the doorway she hadn't realised but she had sparked up a cigarette and was taking long thoughtful draws as she contemplated her current situation. It had become a habit again, outside of work there was not much to do in the Ukraine other than think of Serena. Drinking wasn't brilliant because Trauma surgery and hangovers were not great bedfellows, so smoking filled a void. A quick fix, a plaster on a stab wound._

 _Bernie's thoughts were interrupted by gentle hands winding around her waist, "Busted Major!" Serena said in a lovingly stern manner, she wasn't really cross, just pretending. She knows that if the last few months were as shitty for Bernie as they were for her then actually lighting the cigarettes would have helped._

 _"_ _Oh, sor, sorry Serena, Ukraine was kinda…"_

 _"_ _It's OK, I, I don't mind."_

 _"_ _I do though." Bernie mused._ _Serena isn't going to want to kiss me now._ _How could she be so stupid. She flicked the stub into the distance "Last one, promise." She pulled Serena to her chest, "Jason, um, is he OK?"_

 _Serena marvelled at how Bernie always put others before herself, she loved that Bernie did seem to genuinely care for Jason, not just because there was an implied obligation._

 _"_ _Jason, well, Jason! No actual drama, as per…. Nothing to worry about. Just Jason stuff. Sorry but I have to keep my phone on, ignoring it simply doesn't work." Bernie waved her hand as if to dismiss Serena's defence of her situation._

 _"_ _Serena, you don't have to …. With regards Jason. As long as he is OK… Let's go inside."_

 _Bernie locked the door, "Be right back, get yourself another and I'll meet you on the sofa." Bernie dashed off to the bathroom squeezing Serena's hand as she left._

 _Serena poured another, she knew she wouldn't be going back to hers tonight, not least because she had too many wines to drive, but it felt right to stay here. Jason had called, as usual to discuss something menial, but to Jason it wasn't. She had, when she heard Bernie go outside, taken the opportunity to talk to Jason candidly and explain that if he decided to come home tonight she would not be there like he would expect. They discussed it and he was going to stay where he was, she had managed to sooth his anxieties over the phone, a bit of a first, progress…_

 _Serena had topped off her own glass and opened another beer for Bernie, she sat on the sofa and listened to the music coming from nowhere and decided that she hadn't disliked any song that had appeared on the playlist from Bernie's I Pod. She didn't know any of the artists and the only songs she knew were covers done by these artists of songs she did know. She decided the song that was on now she really liked, she lost herself in the lyrics as Bernie reappeared and planted a kiss on her lips as she was sitting back with her eyes closed._

 _"_ _Mmmmm" Serena hummed as Bernie continued to kiss as she sat down, she had sprayed deodorant and obviously brushed her teeth and used mouthwash. Whatever the mouthwash was it was breath taking._ _If every time she smokes I get a kiss like that I could handle that._

"OK?" Bernie queried

"Yes, you?"

Bernie nodded as she wrapped her arms around Serena and exhaled as if in relief.

Serena stole herself, thinking she might know the answer before she asks, "So, 'the help' you needed, not unpacking?"

"No, um, ah, not exactly."

"So?"

"Come on Serena, do I have to say it?"

"Yes." Serena was quite clearly amused at this.

Bernie sighed, "Please tell me that you haven't found today…"

Serena looked quizzically knowing exactly.

"It has taken me all of my strength not to sweep you up and do naughty things to you today. The air has been so thick with sexual tension, I can only compare it to the weather prior to a big storm. Serena I need a thunderstorm, otherwise I might just explode." She said it so matter of factly but inside she was a wreck of nerves hoping that this rare display of honesty with no stutters or bumbling hadn't been too much.

Serena had to admit she had compared it to trying to walk in treacle. This couldn't go on. She so wanted to give herself to Bernie, the nerves were there but she decided to channel them as she stated "Chances of thunder and lightning 100%" as she leaned in to kiss a slightly relieved looking Bernie.


	3. Chapter 6

Bernie felt the relief wash over as their kiss ended and they looked deep into each other's eyes. They both took a sip from their drinks as Bernie rose from the sofa holding Serena's hand and guided her to the bedroom.

As they entered the bedroom Bernie took a last swig and placed her bottle on the side and took Serena's drink and placed it alongside. Smoothly as she shut the bedroom door she pressed Serena against it and kissed her hard pressing her body against Serena's. She could hear Serena purring at this sensation as she held both of hands so that the backs of Serena's hands were pressed against the door level with her ears.

Bernie ran her hands down Serena's arms and rested to her hips. She then worked her hands up to Serena's shoulders to shrug of her blouse, and the back down to her waist to work her top over her head. All of this was done so deftly, which was no surprise to Serena given that Bernie worked so well with her hands in surgery. All the while they are kissing deeply tongues exploring, occasionally drifting to kiss necks and nibble earlobes.

Serena fumbled with Bernie's buttons, her mind distracted by the new sensations she was feeling. Bernie assisted by shrugging off her shirt as soon as it was undone. Serena's hands were in Bernie's hair as Bernie was toying with the waistline of Serena's trousers, not through inexperience but more a matter of teasing as her hands ran from the back all the round to the front as she undid the buttons and zip. The trousers fell as Serena gasped. She kissed Bernie harder as she felt Bernie's hands leave her body for all but a minute as she took of her own trousers. _Skinny jeans are a bugger at the best of times, but don't make it difficult Major._ She told herself as her own trousers were now kicked away. Hands back on Serena's hips Bernie broke the kiss to take in Serena in her underwear. She was temporarily knocked out. Better than all those dreams she had indulged in. She couldn't remember when she started dreaming about Serena, was it after their first meeting, she couldn't be sure… all she did know is that while the other 'dreams' didn't go away the good dreams were now outweighing the bad ones.

Before Serena could voice any concerns about why Bernie had broken their kiss and now seemed in shell shock Bernie leaned in and whispered, "Do you always wear simply irresistible matching underwear, or were you hoping to get lucky tonight?"

Serena laughed heavily and rested the front of her head on Bernie's chest "What do you think?" Giving Bernie knowing look. Bernie then swung Serena around and literally swept her up so that they were suddenly in the middle of the bed, Serena resting on the quilt and Bernie half on top of Serena with her left leg between Serena's legs.

"Wow." Serena released subconsciously.

"You OK?" Bernie asked as she stroked Serena's face, waiting for reassurance and confirmation from Serena.

"More than OK darling, just adjusting to this." She smiled and signalled to their positioning.

"You know, um, we, ah, don't have to do anything else, if you aren't ready" Bernie stumbled her way through this statement, it was not a disappointed tone, not at all, it was unsure. All she wanted is what Serena wanted. She already had more than she ever imagined possible so anything more would be a bonus. The mantra started to creep back in. _Don't screw it up, don't rush her. This one is a keeper, don't scare her away._ _Before the mantra was allowed to seep in further Serena spoke with an unexpected clarity that she summoned from deep within, she could see that Bernie's confidence had dipped and the stutters and fumbles were returning, "I'm ready, just, you know, be gentle with me Major." She kissed Bernie deeply to reinforce her words._

 _It seems to have worked because Bernie's hands started to re-explore, she ran her hands down Serena's sides knowing that it had an effect on her, it was like knowing the combination to a safe holding something very precious. After that every move of Bernie's was met by a response from Serena's body. The next time Serena's back arched in response to her touch Bernie slid her hands behind Serena's back and toyed with her bra. "Can I?"_

 _Serena responded with a kiss because all words had left her, Bernie took this as explicit consent as she unhooked the fastens and threw the bra in the general direction of all the other discarded clothes. She took in the sight before her. All those loose tops and adventurous blouses had served to hide Serena's body form. She had a voluptuous bosom and Bernie was instantly drawn like a moth to a flame. She started to kiss the flesh of Serena's breasts as Serena ran her fingers through Bernie's hair still trying to catch up on the evolving events. Bernie caught Serena's left nipple with her tongue and Serena groaned in pleasure. Bernie bought her hand up to the right breast fondling and teasing that nipple as her tongue flicked against the left nipple, she then took it in her mouth sucking hard and taking a little nibble with her teeth. "Ahhhhh, oh Bernie," escaped from Serena's lips as she worked her hands further into Bernie's hair as Bernie concentrated on her breasts._

Bernie looked up and again asked "You OK?"

Not that Serena minded, she liked that Bernie was so considerate. A considerate lover, _about bloody time!_ She pulled Bernie's face to hers. "Stop worrying, I will let you know if it's not OK." At that she pinched Bernie's side lovingly. "Please know I am fine, more than fine, with it all." She kissed Bernie sweetly thinking how much she had missed those lips in just a few short minutes. Her hands moved to Bernie's bra and she expertly undid the fastening with one hand and drew the bra from between their bodies. "Nicely done," Bernie mumbled as they continued to kiss.

Bernie started to move her body on top of Serena's, her left thigh making contact with Serena's wet knickers. _Fuck me that's hot!_ Bernie was now past all reason, her animal instinct had taken over, all the while though she was conscious of Serena and her nerves; because after all the nerves were not one sided. Serena probably did not realise that there was certain territory that was unchartered for them both.

She moaned deeply and her hand worked its way to Serena's pubic area. Bernie broke the kiss to come in close to Serena's ear, she whispered deeply, "Do you want me to touch you." Again, lost for words Serena put her hand to the arm hovering at her knicker line and pushed down.

Bernie slid her had inside of Serena's pants, it was tight elastic, but not too tight, enough room to work her hand. _Holy shit she is so wet._ Bernie took a large intake of breath as she kissed Serena's neck. As soon as her hand had plunged into Serena's pants Serena had let out a groan of pleasure and her head was thrown back to the pillows, her hands grasping at the duvet.

"You like" Bernie whispered. She realised that Serena did like it when she leaned in close to whisper to her.

"Mmmmmmmmmmm" was about all that Serena could muster.

Bernie was running circles around Serena's clit, she did not dare do more as she could feel Serena was close to peaking and actually running her finger over her clit might be a bit… overwhelming. She herself could feel that she was on the peak of coming, here she was making love to the woman she had admired from a distance for longer than she cared to admit. Her fingers changed direction as she ran them from Serena's clit to her opening, this did not go unnoticed and got a positive reaction.

Serena's head still back on the pillow, her neck exposed, Bernie added light kisses and moved to Serena's ear, "You know that help I wanted? Do you want to help now?" Serena lifted her head to look at Bernie, "Oh yes."

Bernie took Serena's hand and led it to her stomach and pushed down so that Serena's hand was plunged into the wet heat of Bernie's core. "All still Ok love?" Bernie added. Serena confirmed by continuing to explore.

As Serena's hand made contact both women moaned in ecstasy. Serena could not believe how warm and wet Bernie was. "That's all you." Bernie whispered, at that point she pushed two fingers inside of Serena which were happily accepted. Serena moving her fingers over Bernie's clit as Bernie moved her fingers rhythmically to the rise and fall of Serena's back.

Serena repositioned her fingers and felt Bernie falter as she obviously enjoyed whatever it was she had done. At that point Serena felt a chill down her spine as it all became too much as she came hard. Letting out a long deep moan smiling and kissing Bernie. Within a millisecond Bernie had clasped her hand on Serena's wrist as there was a flow of fluid from her as she also climaxed. Both ladies lay not moving for a few minutes taking deep breaths and trying to restore normality.

Bernie slowly withdrew from Serena and flopped back on to the mattress. "That was some thunderstorm."

They lap suspended in time for some time before Serena broke the silence, "I've never, um, felt, felt like that before. I'm still recovering."

Bernie smiled, "It was kind of fantastic wasn't it? It's not just me thinking that is it?"

"It was bloody fantastic! But…" Serena was selecting her words, "I didn't really do much, hardly fair."

Bernie's heart split a little, _how could she think that?_ " _You_ were instrumental in all of this. You did more than you can ever know." Bernie kissed the top of Serena's head, "Please excuse me I'll be back in a min," Bernie went off to the bathroom leaving Serena to ponder the fact that she had experienced the orgasm of her life and also, somehow, caused Bernie to come without doing very much at all… If there were times to be smug, this was it.

As Serena lay basking in pride Bernie came back and pulled on some pants, a pair of pyjama bottoms and a Sex Pistols t shirt. "Do you want something to sleep in love?" Bernie queried.

"Oh yes please" Serena said slightly relieved that the nakedness was being kept to a minimum.

"Have a look in here" as she pointed to an open drawer and she picked her beer from the side remembering that she did feel very thirsty.

Serena got up and was trying not to get distracted by how sexy Bernie looked. A little flesh seeping through between the t shirt and bottoms. As she approached the proffered drawer Bernie knew she needed to reassure Serena that she was beautiful, a vision. She pulled Serena to her and kissed her. "Get some clothes on because you are driving me wild!" She hadn't planned to say that, it was how she felt.

Serena smiled and chose some lose fitting pyjamas, they were a matching set, she couldn't bring herself to mismatch, although she loved that Bernie pulled it off with ease. They settled in bed with Bernie offering her arm out to Serena to snuggle into her, this wasn't rejected. They lay in peace, happiness. No words exchanged, not needed.

As they lay there the silence was suddenly broken "Bern can I ask a favour?"

"Sure, anything."

Cheekily she eyed Bernie and said, "Can you set your alarm for 5.30 please?"

"What on earth for woman!"

"Well I need to nip home before shift, there is cat in hells chance that I am doing the 'walk of shame'!"

Bernie sits up on her elbow slightly smirking, "Oh, so it's alright for me to do it then, eh?" She nudges Serena in the ribs.

"Well that was entirely different."

"I'm sure." Bernie laughed heartily as she lay back down and kissed Serena softly.

"Goodnight your Majesty."

"Goodnight Major."


	4. Chapter 7

**Another M chapter (definately NSFW), lets face it we know tragedy is around the corner so lets let them have some fun and fluff.**

 **Enjoy!**

Serena was woken with a tender kiss as she slowly opened her eyes to Bernie there in front of her.

"Morning beautiful." Bernie whispered into Serena's ear. Serena decided she liked it when Bernie whispered to her in that tone.

"Someone's chipper this morning." Serena smiled.

"Well, yes, um that and ah, well"

"Yes?"

"Horny!"

She kissed Serena deeply, "You do funny things to me Frauline." Her hands running the sides of Serena's body resting on her hips. "You are irresistible."

Serena must admit that if she wasn't aroused before she was now. Bernie knew exactly how to touch her, what turned her on. It was glorious.

Serena was bought out of her thoughts by that familiar voice in her ear, "Would you mind awfully if I did something naughty before you abandon me?" Serena was laughing at this and wondered what the something naughty would be and curiosity had definitely got the better of her.

"Make it quick Major." She laughed.

"Relax and trust me, I promise you will enjoy this, but if it, you know, is too much; let me know OK."

Serena nodded. _Bloody hell, this came with a warning, what on earth….._

Bernie was kissing down Serena's body until she got to the elastic of the pyjama bottoms, kissing along the border. Serena had her hands in Bernie's hair and her body was writhing at the prospect of what Bernie was going to do next.

Bernie removed the bottoms and Serena's knickers and gently placed a kiss on Serena's public triangle. Serena shuddered at this. Bernie looked up, "Still OK…?" Bernie thought Serena might get fed up of her asking her if she was OK, she felt like she had done it a lot last night, but she needed to do it. She needed to check that Serena was OK with all of this and that it was not too much or too fast.

Serena nodded furiously, her lips tight shut as if trying to stifle more groans. Bernie planted another kiss "Can I?" Serena placed her hands in Bernie's hair gently guiding her head closer to the throbbing between her legs.

Bernie swiftly moved further below the covers and, Serena is not sure how, but she lifted Serena so that now her legs were resting on each of Bernie's shoulders. She then felt the heat from Bernie's tongue flash around her clit, "Jesus fucking Christ." Serena shouted as she could feel that Bernie's shoulders were shaking in laughter as she continued movements around her clit. She reached up to grab Serena's hand as her other hand found Serena's opening and she entered 2 fingers slowly as her tongue continued to work. Bernie was navigating her way around Serena, taking all of her in, _wow she tasted so good!_

Serena's back was arching and she was groaning loudly, very loudly, her hand still playing with Bernie's hair.

Bernie could feel that Serena was about to climax and the thought pleasured her greatly as she hummed. She pulled away from Serena with her tongue but not before she gently sucked on Serena's clit.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh Bernie." Serena exclaimed as she came hard, harder that last night, different. She was shaking. Bernie had reduced her to a trembling wreck. Bernie placed a kiss to the inside of Serena's thigh. She popped her head up, "Was that good for you?" Serena was speechless. The look that she gave Bernie told her that it was and at that Bernie rose from the bed, "I'll just give you a min."

After she had freshened up she got back into the bed where Serena still lay in a state of shock. Bernie kissed her and she came to life, _that mouthwash again!_

"You sure you are OK Serena."

Serena looked across trying to form some words, "Wow, how, uh wow."

Bernie laughed, "I made you swear!"

Serena felt clarity return to her in a wave, "Yes it seems you did you wicked woman."

Bernie lay back with one arm bent under her head.

"No need to look so smug!" Serena said playfully.

"So, first time." Bernie points down.

"Well, Edward was very much, 'Wham, bam, thank you ma'am' and only really interested in the gratification he got from such encounters. It all became a bit perfunctory. For someone who cheated so much he was actually a bit crap."

Bernie laughed, "I eventually decided that no sex was better than crap sex. Which lead his eye to wander even more." She continued "The man wouldn't know what a clitoris was if you gave him a map and compass, never mind what to do if he did find it." Both laughing hysterically at this thought.

"Unlike you, who, well, bit of a dab hand it seems."

Bernie took in the compliment, "Not bad for a first time effort, eh Ms Campbell?"

"No?" Serena said enquiringly. She had assumed that what was new to her was not new to Bernie who firmly had one lesbian relationship under her belt.

Bernie shook her head, "No, new level of intimacy for us both." Serena pondered her words, yes it was; this was definitely different. For a start Bernie was the most considerate lover she had experienced. Not that she had a string of lovers in her wake but she had enough experience to know that it was.

"Right, better get a move on if you are going to execute your plan to avoid the 'Walk of shame'"

"Indeed." Serena pulled back the covers to get out of bed and looked down. "Oh god Bernie, I'm sorry…" she said with an embarrassed look. She knew that she had a powerful orgasm but didn't know she had soaked the sheets, "I'll change your sheets for you."

"No need to apologise and absolutely no need to sort the bedding, although if you want to use my shower, it's all yours."

Serena considered it, "Yes please." Bernie was up and started to busy herself with changing the bedding. As Serena walked past, seemingly not conscious about being naked from the waist down, Bernie gave her a playful slap on the arse.

Serena turned around "Erm, Major, do you mind?"

Bernie shrugged "Not in the slightest," as she bought Serena's body to hers as she kissed her deeply holding Serena's bare buttocks in her hands.

"Now off you go, time is ticking."

Serena obeyed and virtually skipped to the bathroom.


	5. Chapter 8

Serena showered and dressed fairly swiftly and came back into a bedroom to a coffee, that's to say it was just instant coffee, when Bernie had said she had nothing in it really was true. She didn't mind, the coffee really was a thoughtful gesture by someone as domestically challenged Bernie. This added to the fact that the bedding was now changed and in the washer means that she really must have an effect on Bernie. She smiled as she leaned against the dresser as Bernie was finishing putting her running gear. "You really should have waited until I had left before getting changed into your running clothes!" Serena said with a smile taking a sip of her coffee.

"Why?" Bernie asked puzzled.

"Because you, you are quite distracting really."

"I don't have to go for a run, we can stay here with you and we can go to work together." Bernie was obviously saying this to wind Serena up.

"Mmmm given the choice, as much as I would love to stay here with you, the greater good; my dignity, prevails I'm afraid." She kissed Bernie "Plus the run will be good for you."

Bernie smiled, knowing that Serena understood that running was her escapism, it was the space she needed. She probably did not realise the full extent but Serena probably understood it kept Bernie level. "Plus I need to compose myself before shift and seeing you in those," She motions to Bernie's tight fitting clothes, "Really isn't helping with that."

They left the flat together, Bernie starting off on to her run and Serena taking to the car, papping her horn and waving to her blonde beauty as she passed in the car.

Serena arrived home and had just over an hour until the hospital beckoned. She made a proper coffee and decided she needed a second shower, a cold one. She stripped and hit the shower not allowing it to warm up. The cool drops on her skin shocked her into life- what had happened these last 48 hours. Bernie had re-entered her life and a period of emptiness had now been filled with, well, … she was speechless. _Was making love to a woman always like that, or was it because it is Bernie?_ She pondered as she looked back on her previous dalliances and marriage to Edward. She shook her head, _Why think about those, even the best was not a patch on last night and this morning._ She worked shampoo into her hair as she thought of Bernie's unruly golden locks. She did love running her hands through Bernie's hair and hoped Bernie liked it too.

Working on autopilot in the freezing shower her stomach lurched as her insecurities crept in. _What the hell does Bernie see in me? I am not a patch on her physically, she is fit, physically and attractively. She runs for god's sake. The closest I get to fresh air is letting the Shiraz breathe before I drink it._

Although a confident and often flirty person those insecurities were there and if they surfaced, the tended to root in a little. _What if she gets bored of me, the novelty wears off, what if I can't satisfy her?"_

"Stop it you bloody fool." Serena found herself saying as she towelled off. _Bernie, the runner, in every sense, was now only taking runs around the block, not to the nearest airport._

Bernie felt content as her feet hit the tarmac in opposite strokes. She took deep draws at the November air. The fresh air consuming her brain. _Serena forgave me, not only that she….._ Bernie knew her reluctance to return to the UK was down to her fear of returning to rejection. _Not that she didn't deserve it._ Something she would always think. On her first day back she had very much been made aware that Serena had not coped well in her absence. She had been fed this information from various sources so it was not all pieced together yet but all she did know is that she was the cause of it all.

She got back to the flat in no time and showered and dressed in a daze thinking about the 'breakfast' she had indulged in not an hour before. She smiled and realised she was now at a loose end. Pottering around flat wasn't helping. She checked her phone wondering if it was stupid/needy to text Serena.

 _One unread message, hope its…._

"Hope you enjoyed your run Major, needed another shower when I got home, a cold one! See you at the coal face. S x"

Bernie smiled. Thinking of how to reply.

"You take cold showers, I run. B x"

Bernie decided to get to work, yes, would be early but there would be 2 things there she needed. Serena and food.

As she got into her car she felt her phone go in her coat pocket.

"Thank you for last night/this morning. I only hope I can satisfy you as much as you satisfied me. I am still on a high. S x"

Bernie read the message wondering if she was reading more or less into this message as it was meant to convey. She decided, as she was running early, to read it in the way her instinct told her. _Serena was still nervous and although she could not deny her feelings and they do have undeniable sexual chemistry, maybe she needs to be reminded that everything is fine, more than fine._

"Frauline, I can assure you I am more than satisfied. Making love to you gave me immeasurable pleasure…. PS I REALLY enjoyed my breakfast. B x"

 _That'll make her blush! But hopefully get the point across._

Bernie put her phone on silent during her drive, as not to get distracted. She parked up and searched out Serena's car with her eyes scanning across the car park. _Not here yet, long cold shower?_

She took long strides into the hospital and went straight to Pulses for a breakfast roll and coffee. As she entered the ward the staff on the AAU looked in shock as two things struck them.

1\. Ms Wolfe and Ms Campbell left together in one car last night but have not arrived together.

2\. Ms Wolfe, who is usually not known for time keeping, was more than 30 minutes early.

Bernie made a bee line for Morven who had been on the night shift, "Let me dump my stuff in the office and then we can make a start on handover so you can get off." Bernie turned on her heel and headed for the office as Morven stood in shock, "Um, OK."

Bernie and Morven were well into rounds when Serena arrived on to AAU. Bernie felt her presence as she walked onto the walk, looking simply radiant. _Maybe a good seeing to was just what she needed._ Bernie chuckled to herself inwardly thinking about what she had done to Ms Campbell that morning. Bernie then realised she had not checked her phone since leaving the car. She excused herself from bay 3 and dug in her scrubs for her phone.

 _One unread message._

"Not as much as I did Major. S xx

"Wanna bet! B x"

Hope people are enjoying this as much as I enjoy writing it.


	6. Chapter 9

Work that day went quickly. Serena did not get much chance to see Bernie that day. Seems that she was not the only person pleased to have the ex-army medic back. Bernie was called to ED for a consult and then Keller called, Sasha wanted an assist on a procedure and Bernie was straight in there.

Serena buried herself in paperwork and keeping the ward ticking over. She realised that these last 2 days Jason had gone to great lengths to remove himself from his usual routine in order to accommodate the bigger picture of her and Bernie, she knew that this was a great feat for him but testified to her that Jason did really did like Bernie because it was not even in question that he had made some allowances. Fact is she had dropped on because, unlike Robbie, Bernie accepted and liked Jason and saw no issue with him being a big factor in her life. Not out of obligation either.

She let out a huge sigh.

Then she saw Jason pass. She followed out from her office and waited until Jason had finished delivering Mr Pascoe to bay 4.

"Jason."

"Oh, Hi Auntie Serena, I'm back already. Isn't that good?"

"Superb, you sure you're up to it." She nudged his good arm lovingly knowing that physical contact was still in the balance with him.

"Well yes, I am hardly any use at home." He paused, "I just don't accept to move the overweight ones." He said with no trepidation or hushed tone. Serena groaned inwardly but smiled at Jason knowing she owed him a lot.

"Today Wednesday, back to normal, lasagne for dinner tonight?"

"Oh yes, is Bernie coming over?"

Bless him, of all the people she had expected to wrangle with over this; other than Elinor; Jason had been her worry, but in fact he had been her shining star. He saw things as they were. Sometimes brutal, unfaltering honesty did pay out. But unfortunately most were wired with that filter of doubt, uncertainty, fear and trepidation; these feelings often won out. Serena often thought about Jason and his innocent, one dimensional view of the world and whilst considered a disability by many she did not view it this way. How refreshing would it be to view the world how he did?

"Not sure Jason, would you like Bernie to come over?"

He pondered, "Sometimes she can be quiet, but she does get more questions right on quiz shows than you. I like Bernie."

Serena smiled, she had the boy on side, her boy as she considered him. After all they came as a package. Ultimately that was why she and Robbie did not work out, he couldn't hack the routine that came around accepting Jason. Bit more than accepting a bratty kid, like Elinor. Moody offspring always came around. Her mind drifted to how Elinor was now bosom buddies with Edward's latest squeeze. It was difficult to watch, but then she pondered that Elinor was very much her father's daughter and very much did anything to serve her own ends, including being nice to Daddy's new Mrs!

She laughed at the fact that Bernie would do all she could to get on with Elinor but she certainly would not entertain the notion of throwing money or attention to the situation to gain favour.

Her office phone rang sharply. "Serena Campbell speaking…"

"Hi 'Rena, it's me, sorry, pig of a day… um, lunch?"

Serena did not expect that, Bernie had called from the Consultant office on Keller. _'Rena… she hadn't called her that before. She liked it._

"Yes ready when you are darling."

"I'll be down in ten."

True to her word Bernie was back on AAU within minutes and ensured that everything was ticking over before seeking out Serena.

Serena was signing discharge papers as Bernie finished walking the ward. Serena handed everything to Fletch, "I'm off to lunch, page me if I'm needed."

He nodded and tipped a wink to Raf as Serena and Bernie headed off.

As they reached the Elevator and the doors opened they looked across at Jac who was already in there. "Ladies." Jac said with a knowing tone.

"Jac." Bernie said.

"Ms Naylor" Serena replied, "How is your new rather dishy Italian settling in?"

"Well he has certainly made himself known and turned a few heads; not that I thought yours was for turning." She quipped as she left the lift rather swiftly.

Serena looked in shock, Bernie smiled and shrugged. As they joined the queue at Pulses Serena's phone goes off. "Elinor." She stated looking at Bernie to check it was OK to take it. Bernie motioned her hand to say it was fine. "She probably wants something, always does."

"Maybe not."

"Bet lunch on it?" Bernie gave her thumbs up.

"Ellie" she said lovingly as she answered.

"You took your time answering Mother!" _Charming!_

"Well I am busy at work you know." Bernie was looking at the board deciding what to order.

"I know, I know, I'll be really quick; can I come over tonight please?"

"Tonight?" Serena rolled her eyes at Bernie.

"Yes tonight, I need to ask a favour. Oh yeah and it will nice to be see you I suppose ha!" _Very droll._

"Oh, a favour, what is it Ellie?" Serena beamed at Bernie and held her phone between her ear and shoulder as she actioned to Bernie mouthing, "Latte, 2 shots, large; cheese and pesto panini." And blew her a kiss whilst the whole time listening to Elinor rattle on. Bernie on the other hand nearly melting into a puddle on the floor at that little gesture as she composed herself to place the order.

"Well Mum as part of my assessment I need to do a 'hard hitting documentary' style thing and we have to delve into the underbelly of a topic of our choosing… so I thought, the NHS, growing up with parents who are slaves to the place and seeing the real story, blah blah blah. I will explain properly later but Mum I need an in, someone with some clout to get me where I need to be and…. Well… Deputy CEO and all…." Serena listened as Bernie ordered and carried their coffees to the table and she followed.

"Well…." Serena started as she was going to tell Elinor she was no longer Deputy CEO but she was cut off.

"Well we can talk about it later Mum gotta dash 630-7pm OK."

"Yes fine, bye Ellie"

"Yeah bye."

Serena was wearing her infuriated face as she sipped the coffee.

"So?" Bernie said holding her cup with two hands, elbows resting on the table.

"As per, she needs something, she wants to film a hard hitting documentary about the NHS and needs her Deputy CEO mother to pull some strings."

"But you're not…"

"No, I know, but I didn't get a chance to mention that because that would mean getting a word in."

"True."

"No doubt she wants to come round tonight to convince me that it's the best idea ever, and even if I tell her I am not Deputy CEO anymore she will still expect me to use my connections with Ric and Hanssen."

"No doubt." Bernie agreed.

Serena noted that Bernie seemed to love listening to her talk, she always let her speak and listened intently and whist she was a woman of fewer words she always picked the right ones.

"Anyway I suppose if I am going to tell her about not being Deputy CEO I need to tell her about.." She wagged her finger between the two of them as their food arrived at the table."

"Yes, I mean if she is going to yours for dinner, do you really think Jason is going to be the soul of discretion." She observed, rightly or wrongly, but she knew it would be ten times worse if Elinor found out via Jason or worse in the hospital during her documentary.

Serena ran a hand through her hair as if resigning herself to the difficult task ahead. Elinor could be a madam at the best of times.

"You are right Bern, it is not fair for Jason to have to keep our secret from his cousin, he will not see why she should not know that I am happy, with you; even if she does not see it like that. Also for her to find out another way, argh… I mean if she is going to be channelling her inner Trevor McDonald and filming here, she would be bound to find out and well knowing Ellie, if it was a better story…." She did not have to finish the sentence as Bernie clicked.

"So what about you?"

"What about me?" Bernie said as she picked at her sandwich.

"Cam and Charlotte."

"Ah, well safe to say Cam is in the know. You only have to breathe the air in these wards to pick up the gossip… as for Charlotte, well depends if Cam has told her."

"Do you think he has?"

"God no, he isn't going to want to light that touch paper. She has only just started talking to me after months of the cold shoulder. Never quite forgiven me for running away when I wasn't happy with Marcus. Certainly not for causing the divorce, because of course, it was all my fault." Bernie twanged with guilt because she did run away, and she did hurt those around her and yes, she was in the most ridiculous farce of a marriage but she was the one who cheated on him; with a woman.

Serena could see the pain in her face, and laid a hand on hers. "Bernie, don't give yourself a hard time."

"But is nothing I don't deserve."

"OK, so you are not blameless, but you don't deserve the crap you have had and you certainly shouldn't add to it by giving yourself an equally hard time. Forgiveness is a wonderful thing." She lifted her hand away conscious that she didn't want it to look to romantic, more friend consoling another friend.

Bernie looked at Serena. How could she deserve her? Serena had forgiven her and taken her back, as it were and was now her main support.

"As usual Ms Campbell, voice of reason; I'm seeing the kids at the weekend. I will sort it. After all, best case scenario she might see it wasn't just a midlife crisis lesbian phase and realise I was not meant to stay with her Dad. Who knows?"

"That's the spirit Major." Serena said as her pager buzzed. "Duty calls! You coming or staying here."

"I'll finish this," Signalling to her cup, "Then I promised Sasha I would nip back up to de brief on our op this morning" She smiled, "It was really good to work with Sasha, I will have to tell you about this op later, I think you will like it."

Serena smiled as she dashed off.

As Bernie pondered into her coffee cup Ric Griffin occupied the space vacated by Serena.

"Glad I caught you Ms Wolfe."

Bernie looked up as she hadn't noticed Ric approach. She smiled in acknowledgement of his presence.

"I take it that the request to find you an alternative placement elsewhere is now no longer needed."

"Correct."

"Well I know that there are many here at Holby who are glad you decided to make this your home." His eyes wandered to the elevator that Serena had just entered. "I do hope that after a rocky start that you are able to make a permanent base here at Holby and you are happy." Both knowing that this statement did not just apply to her work at Holby as a trauma consultant.

"Thank you Ric, I do think I am ready to settle now." Again both knowing that this statement applied to the hospital and Serena.

At that Ric nodded and left the booth with his usual polite small bow.

Bernie finished her coffee and ruminated on the fact that she finally felt she was somewhere that she did not want to run from.


	7. Chapter 10

The afternoon went swiftly and they hardly had chance to speak but in the brief moment they did have in the office they mutually, but reluctantly agreed to go separate ways after work. Serena had to entertain Elinor and resume routine with Jason. Bernie's presence, although appreciated by Serena and Jason, would only serve to exacerbate the situation with Elinor. Bernie knew she had to draw herself back to reality by dealing with post, emails and general life since her return from Kiev. Her radio silence was not restricted to Serena, it was across the board. She now had to face up to it.

Bernie had been called to surgery before the end of their shift so she did not get to see Serena before she left for home, she did want to at least give Serena some support and encouragement regarding telling Elinor about their relationship. She ended up at the hospital a further 2 hours after her shift, kind of thankful that it took her mind off the reality of life that waited for her once she departed the Wyvern Wing.

By the time she was heading out Elinor would be at Serena's, working on the assumption that she had been on time. Bernie wondered if Serena had 'dropped the bombshell' as it were and then decided she can't have as her unread messages remained at nil.

She stole herself and sent a quick text.

"Hey you, sorry only just out, hope tonight goes OK with Ellie. If you need me, I'm other end of the phone. Bx"

She got in the car and decided to go shopping, if not for herself, for Serena. She could not have her coming back to a kitchen where the only food was a box of cereal and a jar of jam. Plus she felt she needed to pick up her game, at least have a bottle of milk and loaf of bread in the flat. _Plus delays going back to the empty flat with only memories of Serena lingering._

Serena had made good time home. She was disappointed that she had not seen Bernie before she left but surgery called. She could have done with some reassurance, even if it was in the form of one of Bernie's silent knowing looks, it would have been reassurance enough.

Jason was watching TV when she arrived home.

"Hi Jason, I'm home."

He came through to the kitchen.

"Auntie Serena, you got home quick, is Bernie with you?"

"No Jason, um she had surgery, still there. So she is going home after. Anyway still set three places, Ellie is gracing us with her presence." Serena added this last fact with a little more cynicism than intended.

Jason beamed and returned to the living room to continue his TV watching.

The doorbell went at 6.40pm which was positively early for Elinor. Serena was just pulling the home made lasagne from the oven.

"Hello Darling."

"Mum." Elinor smiled and walked through to the hall.

Jason was setting the table and Serena was plating up the lasagne as she asked Elinor to place the salad bowl on the table.

They sat and ate, talk flowed easily; all things considered. Elinor was still adjusting to having an auntie she or her mother had never met and a cousin who was Jason, and who now lived with her mother. Serena knew it was not easy for Elinor, even though she seemed to like Jason it was like she was envious of the relationship that Jason had made with her Serena. Serena reflected that she did not feel bad about this because it was Elinor who had put the distance between them and contacted on her terms, whilst becoming best friends with Edward's new wife, _after all they were similar ages!_ She mused to herself.

The conversation, unsurprisingly, turned to Elinor and her project and the magic she needed her mother to perform to get her in the underbelly of the hospital. At no point did Serena mention that she was no longer Deputy CEO, the subject did not come up and Serena did not feel the need to mention it. She was determined in her resolve that if she was going to mention anything tonight it was not her role in the hospital.

Serena had spoken to Jason before Elinor's arrival, firstly asking him not to mention Bernie yet as she was going to tell Elinor about her after they had eaten. Secondly she asked that after they had eaten if he go and watch his programmes and let her and Elinor talk. He had been great about this and stated, "That's fine auntie Serena, I don't really care to listen to you and Ellie disagreeing on everything. I do like Ellie but she does not really speak to you very nicely does she?"

Serena could all but shrug at that.

As planned after dinner Jason had retreated to the living room leaving Serena and Elinor in the kitchen/dining room.

Serena was clearing plates and loading the dishwasher as Ellie sat at the table watching her mother.

Serena stole herself, "So Ellie, I have some news."

"News…."

"Yes, news, good news."

"Go on then don't leave me hanging mum."

"I'm, um, seeing someone."

"Ooooooh new development! Details?"

Serena took a breath as she started the dishwasher and returned to the table.

"Bernie." Serena said this hoping her daughter had at least listened to any of the conversations over the last few months, knowing she would have mentioned the trauma surgeon.

"Bernie? Sounds like a retired science teacher mum."

"No, no, Bernie as in my co-lead at the hospital, Berenice Wolfe."

The penny dropped for Elinor as she slammed her hands on the table, "What the FUCK mother!"

"ELINOR!" Serena snapped.

"Er, um, sorry but that's a bit of a…. so you're a lesbian now then?"

"Well…"

"Jesus Christ, what is this? You crossed over to the 'dark side' because you hate men because Dad and Robbie treated you like shit, so now you hate cock."

Serena winced at the crudeness of her words. "No, Ellie, not at all like th…"

Elinor cut in, "So is it a Sapphic midlife crisis thing?" She put on a mocking voice, "Discovering your inner Serena."

"Ellie, no. I've fallen in love with Bernie and the fact she is a woman is, well, academic."

Elinor studied her mother for a few minutes, the silence maintained. "So, you love her? I assume that's reciprocated?" Serena nodded slowly but confidently. "And you are happy?"

"Yes, yes I am, more than I can say."

Elinor took this in and measured up the information. "OK well I'm not hanging out the rainbow bunting but if you are happy.." She shrugged not knowing how to end the sentence, she added jokingly, "But if you go all strange and start wearing Birkenstocks and listen to KD Lang there may have to be an intervention; OK?"

They both laughed, "OK." Serena smiled.

Serena topped up both their glasses and they clinked glasses in toast but Serena, knowing Ellie as she did, could see that maybe she was masking her true thoughts, which was quite disconcerting.


	8. Chapter 11

"So, what does he make of all this then?" Elinor said as she nodded her head in the direction of Jason.

"Ask him, he's just coming in to get a drink."

Jason opened the door to the kitchen as Elinor asked "So, Jase, what do you think of this mum and Bernie thing? Is Bernie good enough for my mother?"

Jason considered his reply, "I like Bernie very much; Auntie Serena has liked her for a long time. They should have been together ages ago but Bernie went to work in Ukraine even though Auntie Serena begged her not to go."

"Jason!" Serena said in a clipped tone to stop whatever he was going to say next, but she knew the damage was done.

"Erm, what?" Elinor directed her puzzled look to Serena.

Before Serena could select her words Jason cut in, "Well Auntie Serena and Bernie kissed weeks ago, it was obvious they liked each other but then Bernie went away for weeks and weeks and came back just. And now they are together."

Serena just sat with her elbows on the table and head in hands feeling powerless to stop Jason's rather factual approach to the summary.

Elinor seemed visibly angry, her voice a little raised. "So let me get this right; you fancied her, she fancied you, you kissed, then she fucks off to take a job abroad even though you didn't want to. And; that's why you have been a hot mess for the last 2 months."

"Well no, not exa…." Serena said lifting her head and shaking it.

"Yes Elinor, correct."

"Jason, please!" Serena was rather short with him, shorter than she intended.

"Sorry, I said something wrong again, didn't I?" He turned around and went back into the living room.

Serena turned her attention back to Elinor who had daggers for her, "So, this Bernie, she likes you but buggers off and leaves you a wreck, and then when she does come back you instantly take her back and into your bed." Elinor's voice fully raised and raging, ensuring she made emphasis on Bernie's name.

"Elinor!" Serena shouted back in equal measure.

"You really do have a habit of people who are just going to treat you like shit!" At that she got up and left the table, picking up her car keys and bag.

"Ellie, please, don't go."

"No mum, I need to go, because there is nothing left to say. I really aren't that bothered that Bernie is a woman, yes it's a shocker that you are suddenly a lesbian but I am OK with that. What I am not OK with is the fact that she has already damaged you once and you forgave her and want a relationship with someone who is probably going to hurt you again."

She turned on her heel and left, Serena chasing after her. As she left the front door she added, "Look mum, I hope I am wrong and don't have to say 'I told you so.' But so far Bernie has not done anything to make me think she's good enough for you."

She slammed the door. _Shit. That didn't go as planned. But not in the way she thought. Elinor wasn't bothered that she loved a woman, it was the woman she had chosen that Ellie had taken umbrage with. Shit, shit, shit._

Serena retrieved her wine and felt bad for shouting at Jason, she had not briefed him on what he was allowed to say and not regarding Bernie, so really it was her fault that this had happened, especially since she had suggested Ellie ask Jason about Bernie knowing her would say he likes Bernie. She had not expected it to backfire.

She popped her head into the living room and knelt down level with Jason who was sitting watching TV.

"Jason, I am sorry about earlier, for shouting. It was my fault for not discussing this with you before Ellie came round."

"It's OK Auntie Serena. I understand. I didn't mean for you and Ellie to argue."

"Well that certainly was not your fault! Elinor and I always find a way to have words…" She touched his arm lightly. "I'm off to bed now Jason, don't stay up too late."

"I won't, goodnight Auntie Serena."

"Goodnight Jason."

As she passed through the kitchen she picked up the bottle to take up with her.

She sat on the bed and decided to text Elinor.

"Ellie, darling, I'm sorry. Please can we talk more? I think you need to meet Bernie to understand. I did not 'take her back' lightly, as it were. I was V furious at her for going away and she knows that. Please can we have lunch soon? I don't want this to fester. Mum x"

Serena saw she had an unread message, Bernie.

"Hey you, sorry only just out, hope tonight goes OK with Ellie. If you need me, I'm other end of the phone. Bx"

 _I do need you._

"Hi Bern, tonight, didn't go as expected. Ellie and I argued, she stormed out. Not sure what to do. Sx"

She heard Jason come up the stairs and go to his room and as the silence descended her thoughts were running around in her head. This was no good, it was fast approaching 11pm and her mind was swamped. She checked her phone and could see that Bernie had seen her message, but had not replied yet. _Maybe she is thinking what to say, she doesn't always find words easily._

Her phone went off, Ellie.

"Hi Mum, sorry for going off on one but I love you and don't want to see you hurt. I will check my uni schedule and let you know about lunch. As for Bernie, I will try- for your sake, but lunch, just me and you this time. Ellie x"

Serena was thinking about her reply and decided to go with short and sweet.

"Thank you darling, hope to hear from you soon. Mum x"

"X" Was the reply. _Something I suppose._

Phone went off again, Bernie. _Phew._

"I'm here, do you need to talk?" Serena did need to talk and she wished Bernie was here to comfort her and hold her, but a phone call would have to do.

"Yes please, is it too late to call?"

She took a sip of wine as her phone went off.

Bernie had been sitting in her flat thinking about Serena and her night with Ellie, thinking about texting again but gathered they needed the space, so she just went outside to have a smoke to give her hands something to do. Her phone went off, Serena. _Shit, it didn't go well and she wasn't there to support her Serena._

 _How to approach this Major, it's after 11 and you are going to go and knock on the door. No, no, can't do that, its madness. She might not want you there, anyway it would disturb Jason and his routine. Think, think, think._

As she pulled up outside she text Serena realising it had been 20 minutes since the text. Realising also that was not acting supportively. Hopefully she could make it up to Serena.

She text Serena to gauge the response and if her presence was needed. If not, she would sit in the car and text until Serena was OK and then pull off quietly.

The last text she had off Serena was asking if it was too late to talk. _No course not._

She dialled Serena's number as she got out of her car and it was answered straight away.

"Hi."

"Oh Bernie, so glad you called."

"Are you OK love?"

"Mmmmm, not sure, tonight didn't really go as planned with Ellie; I think I can fix it, hope I can fix it."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Erm, uh, yeah kind of but it's difficult. I just wish you were here so that you could hold me and I could try to explain about why Ellie and I fell out."

"Come and open the front door, its bloody freezing out here." Bernie said with a smile in her voice.


	9. Chapter 12

Serena stood up in shock, "You're outside?"

"Yes." She laughed

The door opened and Serena had tears rolling down her face.

"I'm here now." Bernie said as she wiped Serena's tears. Serena flinched as Bernie's cold hands touched her face.

Bernie pushed the door too and shrugged her coat off and took Serena in a tight embrace. She could feel Serena's breaths regain control. "How did you know I would want to see you?"

"I didn't, um, really… I um, took a chance."

"Thank you, do you want a drink."

"Yes please love." Serena went to the fridge and pulled out a beer and dangled it in front of Bernie.

"Ah, you have beer in?"

"Yep, got them for you." She smiled as she handed it over and planted a kiss on Bernie's lips. She raised her eyebrow.

"What?" Bernie queried knowing full well that Serena probably knew she had been smoking. "Last one I promise."

"You said that last time Major." She laughed and stroked Bernie's face as if to say it was not a problem.

Bernie tipped her head and smiled.

Serena grabbed Bernie's hand and led her upstairs, putting a finger to her lips and pointed up to Jason's room.

Bernie nodded in acknowledgement.

As the got the room Serena headed for the en Suite and signalled for Bernie to get comfortable.

She sat on the bed back resting on the headboard, right knee raised up and left leg pointing outwards. When Serena returned Bernie signalled for her to join her in the space she had made for her.

Serena came out of the bathroom and saw Bernie sitting there, she had her right arm resting on her knee lazily holding the beer bottle between her fingers. Smiling an inviting smile.

Serena made herself comfortable and rested her head on Bernie's chest as Bernie wrapped her left arm and leg around to cocoon Serena to her and protect her. "So, tell me about tonight."

Serena felt a lot calmer and she relayed the evening as if verbatim, recalling it vividly, the anger stemming from Elinor. As she spoke a few tears fell and Bernie kissed them away as she listened intently.

When Serena finished she added, "I just hope she does want to meet for lunch."

Bernie nodded and looked like she was formulating some thoughts and Serena could see this, so she stroked Bernie's arm to encourage her to voice her thoughts.

Serena could swear if she had not been paying attention she would not have heard Bernie utter her next words in her shy, quiet voice, "I-I think she has a point Serena." And shrugged at the admission.

"Bernie, darling, please."

"Um, no Serena, I understand why she is mad. You showed me your feelings and I was scared and ran, leaving you to cope on your own, leaving you thinking you had done wrong. I got back and you forgave me, which I did not expect straight away..."

Bernie passed her bottle to her left hand so she could take a drink, these words stuck in her dry throat.

"I wanted to forgive you, you told me you have changed and I believe you. Life is too short to hold one of my usual grudges when it comes to you."

Bernie took another sip as she considered her next words carefully.

"OK so, um, looking at this subjectively, if it was the other way around and this was Ellie bringing home a new boyfriend who had so far been a bit shitty; please use my behaviour as an example; are you telling me they wouldn't get the Serena Campbell treatment?" She raised her eyebrows in query.

Serena, considered this and put her hand to Bernie's chin, "For a woman of few words you do say the most sensible things."

Bernie smiled shyly as their lips met for a tender kiss.

"Thank you." Serena said as she ran her hand under Bernie's shirt to run her hands over her tight stomach.

"Oh, and where you think you are going Campbell?" She breathed heavily as she knew exactly what Serena was up to, but she did not want Serena to think she had come over just to get her leg over.

"Oh just checking you warmed up from being out in the cold." She laughed.

Bernie could not help but smile as she leaned in to kiss Serena deeply. "Are you feeling better now love?"

"Yes, um, no – I erm don't know." She genuinely looked confused, "I see what you are saying but I cannot agree, if it was the other way around of course I would be livid, she is my daughter. I am her parent."

"OK, OK, yeah I understand, OK new tack…" Bernie rested her bottle down and embraced Serena "Let's look at the positives." Serena looked shocked. "I know, I know; I am trying new things here."

They both laughed.

"1. From what you said, Ellie does not have a problem with you being with a woman, she has a problem with you being with someone who is going to treat you like shit. I am going to prove to her and to you that I will treat you like the royalty that you are; and it might take a while, but we need her to see it for herself, OK." She motioned a tick in the air with her finger.

"2. She text you back. Um, which is a good start I think you will agree. Silence is certainly not golden." She paused as she reflected on her choice to remain incommunicado whilst in Kiev. "She said she wants to meet just you for lunch, which means she wants to hear you out. We can work on project 'like Bernie' later." She motioned another tick in the air which made Serena smile.

"3. In her text she said she loves and cares for you, that's got to mean everything, right. Wants to see you happy." Another tick in the air.

Bernie see's that Serena has tears rolling down her face again. Bernie wipes them away. "I'm sorry love, I didn't mean to make you cry."

Serena patted her arm, "Don't be silly." Smiling.

"Oh and." Bernie laughed hard,

"What."

"Number 4, Ellie gave you a bit of a compliment somewhere in there."

Serena shook her head confused. "Go, on…"

"You said she referred to me leaving you as a 'hot mess', do you know what that means?"

Serena shrugged and shook her head, "Just assumed it was a term of a 'bit of a wreck' really."

Bernie laughed, "Um, its best I show you." She got her phone out and googled the phrase and passed her phone to Serena. Serena read the screen.

"Hot mess- When ones thoughts or appearance are in a state of disarray but they maintain an undeniable attractiveness or beauty."

Serena was now laughing heavily as Bernie shifted her position to stretch her back out a bit.

"You feel better now then?"

"Yes darling, thank you. Is your back OK?"

"Yeah, just need to change position every so often."

"Um, did you want to stay tonight? I know it means a walk of shame or early start but maybe I can work out the kinks in your back."

Bernie winked, "I'd love to stay. Although I have a little confession, I've been keeping some stuff in the car, just in case the situation should arise." She tipped her head in a way that always gave Serena chills.

Serena laughed, "You better go and get it then Major."

As Bernie went out to get her stuff Serena pondered on this situation. She wanted Elinor to see that Bernie was good and kind, yes she faltered and ran, but she came back; and has more than made up for it since. She chuckled as she thought her checkmate at lunch with Elinor would be to tell her that Bernie agreed with her about this. That would surely win her around, somebody telling her she is right!


	10. Chapter 13

A few days passed before Serena heard from Elinor, but this was usual. The fact that Elinor had agreed to meet that week for lunch was a surprise. Admittedly she had used a bit of leverage in her favour, offering to meet Elinor at the hospital for lunch and then they could discuss her uni project and the chances of her filming on the ward.

The day they were meeting Serena was on an early shift and Bernie started a few hours after. The plan was Serena would finish at 3pm and meet Elinor for lunch then they would meet Ric to discuss Elinor's presence at the hospital to do some filming.

Bernie could tell that Serena was anxious, but was not quite sure how to help. Serena was dressed, ready and pacing. Bernie sat on the sofa watching and waiting for a moment to interject.

Serena passed by the sofa and Bernie caught her hand, "Rena, come sit, for a minute." She pulled Serena towards her and she lands on her lap.

"It will be fine love, I promise. Elinor loves you dearly and yes she is a bit stubborn, like her mother, but she has agreed to meet you."

Serena nodded in agreement.

"Don't tie yourself in knots, OK, what happens, happens; we will get through it, hopefully with Ellie on board."

Serena planted a kiss on Bernie's lips. "Once more unto the breach…" Serena sighed as she pulled herself up to go to work.

"Don't worry, I will be there soon and you know where I am when you meet with Ellie, OK."

"OK" Serena liked Bernie talking the helm, looking out for her, bringing sense to her chaos.

At that Serena made for the door knowing if she looked back even once she would stumble. _Best foot forward Campbell!_

The day went swiftly, by the time Bernie was on the ward, AAU was in full swing and they were but ships that passed in the night, as it were.

About 10 minutes before the end of shift Serena was finishing off some paperwork and Bernie came in. Bernie had not really glanced at the time after coming out of theatre but thought it must be near Serena's clocking off time. She entered the office and saw Serena, looking nervous.

"Serena."

Serena looked up, sighed and threw her hands up in exasperation, "Why am I so wound up, nervous. I know it's stupid Bern but…" She couldn't finish the sentence because even she didn't know.

As Serena looked ready to just heap on the floor and give up Bernie swept in to hold her. "It will be fine, you will be fine, Ellie will be fine."

Serena looked up as if to query, "Please, don't get into a state, Ellie is coming to meet you willingly" Bernie reflected on her relationship with Charlotte and only hoped that she might be as accommodating as Elinor.

"I am only a call, page, text, email away if you need me."

Serena nodded as she picked up her bag and coat to head down to Pulses, "How do I look?"

Bernie chuckled, "It's hardly fair to ask me, I think you are strikingly gorgeous."

"Pah" Serena exclaimed as she brushed past Bernie in a seductive way and went the door to face the world, and her daughter.

Serena called Elinor's phone, it went to answer phone, "Darling, I am in pulses, I've got us a table window side. Come to me, we can order food when you arrive."

She sat nursing a coffee for 25 minutes, she did not contact Elinor again for fear of being full on and pushing her away, she waited patiently. A text came through from Bernie.

"Hope you and Ellie have a good chat, catch up with you later. B x"

Serena wanted to reply but she knew Bernie would panic if she thought Serena had been stood up. She would blame herself. She would be down in a shot.

A few minutes later she saw the figure of her daughter sweep through the café, "Mum! Sorry. Nightmare! Uni ran over, bloody parking nightmare. I'm here now though."

Serena smiled warmly, "That's Ok darling, what do you want?"

Ellie sat and looked at the menu card. "Ooooh caramel latte and a cheese and ham toastie please."

"Coming up!"

Serena returned to the table with drinks and sat opposite Elinor wondering whether she should speak first. "Glad you came darling?"

Elinor smiled, "Me too Mum, sorry I lost it the other day. I just don't want to see you hurt."

"I know Ellie. To be fair when I told Bernie about what you said, she actually agreed with you."

Ellie looked at her mum, "Really?"

"Really, she set me straight. She said you had a point, she had treated me terribly and I didn't deserve it. She said she would need to show me, and you, that she could treat me right… I actually think she said she would treat me like royalty." They both laughed as the food arrived.

"Wow." Elinor pulled a face behind her toastie. "Still think it's all a bit… whirlwind and I am still shocked that you are…. Well… you know, gay. But I'll keep an open mind regards Bernie. I know Serena Campbell doesn't always have the best tastes in men… or women, but you seem different about her."

"That's all I can ask Ellie, just give her a chance. She has promised she has changed since leaving and she wants to treat me well and so far she has."

"I'm sure." Elinor said in a cheeky tone.

Serena gave her a look, Elinor knew exactly what it meant. "Sorry Mum." She laughed.

"No seriously, she has been brilliant. She is fab with Jason, they got on like a house on fire the second they met, and it was her who encouraged him getting a job and worked me around."

"You weren't together then were you?"

"No, no, not at all. In fact, we disagreed over it."

"So when did you know then, sorry if I'm being nosey but surely you didn't wake up one day as a gay!"

"Elinor!"

"What Mum. I'm curious."

"Not sure really, because I didn't really know what the feelings I was feeling were. But I knew there was something there after Fletch's stabbing."

Elinor listened intently as Serena opened up to her and she could tell her mother was absolutely smitten and a little part of her wanted to meet this Bernie to get the measure of her.

"Anyway when did you tell Bernie about our row, I bet you called her slagging me off the second the door closed?" Elinor said in a swift change of subject, having learned enough about feelings.

"No, I text her to said we had argued and you had left and I didn't know what to do."

"And?"

"And, she didn't reply for ages."

"Oh… that's reassuring Mum."

"But, when she did reply I said I wish she was here so we could talk, and then she called me as she was outside."

"OMG, it's like a teenage romance."

"Mmmm, indeed." Serena smirked.

Just then Serena's phone went off. It was Ric. Serena held her hand up to tell Elinor she had to answer. "Oh hello Ric. On our way."

As she put the phone down she saw a message from Bernie so she send a quick thumbs up emoji.

"Right lady, we have an audience with Mr Griffin; and whatever you do, follow my lead and don't push your luck."

They left Pulses and Elinor linked arms with Serena as they headed to the lift.


	11. Chapter 14

As Serena and Ellie exited the lift Ric met them, "I thought it might be better to do this in your office Serena, after all I assume this project is going to place on AAU. Might be good for us to discuss logistics 'on site' as it were."

Elinor was ecstatic, Serena less so. She knew that this would mean that inevitably Elinor and Bernie would be likely to meet. _Shit… not sure if this is the right time. Double shit… how can I warn Bernie!_

"Lovely, let's go." She said in her most enthusiastic tone. "Just excuse me for one moment." She darted to the ladies before Ric or Elinor could respond.

"Bern, 6 minute warning! Ric, Ellie and I are en route to AAU. Baton down the hatches, best smile please Major. Sx"

She smoothed down her blouse and checked her makeup and went back out to join Ric and Elinor.

Once down on the AAU they made straight for the office. Empty. _Thankfully._ Serena took her chair and gestured to Ric to take Bernie's seat whilst Elinor sat on a chair near Serena's desk and the door.

For the next 25 minutes conversation focused on Elinor's project. Ric really did make Elinor work for her opportunity to film within the walls of the AAU, somewhat to his and Serena's amusement. Elinor had planned for this and Serena was quite impressed at her presentation, proud that she had not assumed she would be a shoo in because of Serena's position.

"Well Elinor this could work, but there are conditions, you understand I'm sure."

Elinor nods firmly, "Yes Mr Griffin."

"You are not to get in the way of patient treatment. Permission should be sought from all patients and staff." He looked at Elinor and then Serena for reassurance.

Serena answered, "Yes Ric, of course. May I add that, Ellie, you are to stick to your remit and stay within the confines of the AAU ward."

"Yes indeed." Ric agreed.

Elinor was about to respond as the door opened.

Bernie had finished in surgery and decided to dive to the office for 5 minutes to collect her thoughts and check her phone. _Hopefully Serena's lunch with Ellie went well._

She stepped in through the door and 3 sets of eyes hit her. Serena, Ric and someone she could only assume was Elinor. Her hunch was probably confirmed by the fact that the young woman sat nearest to the door eyed her head to foot with a measure of curiosity.

"Oh, um, I didn't realise, um I'll come back…"

 _Shit, Bernie didn't get my text._ Serena tried to look at Bernie to give some comfort but Bernie did her usual of avoiding eye contact.

"Ms Wolfe, please." Ric stood and offered the seat. "Stay, this conversation concerns you too."

Ric was working on the assumption that Bernie and Elinor knew each other or had at least met. But given that the temperature in the room felt like it dropped he gathered there was some tension and decided he needed to get the hell out of there. "Anyway I am sure the finer points can be sorted between the three of you. Thank you for your time ladies."

"No thank you Ric." Serena said as Ric did his usual bow out of the room.

There was a silence as a rather large elephant entered the room.

"So, Ellie, this is Bernie; Bernie, Ellie." Serena gestured with waves of arms rather nervously.

It was now Bernie's turn to try to look at Serena to offer her comfort but Serena averted her gaze due to the presence of Elinor. She knew if she looked at Bernie it would be a loving, longing look that wasn't meant for her daughter to witness; particularly since today's lunch had gone well.

"Pleasure to meet you Elinor." Bernie held out her hand to shake, "So when will your filming start?"

"Um, yes; looking to do a week…" Elinor loosely shook Bernie's hand

"Two days, max." Serena cut in.

Elinor sighed, "Two days, in the new year."

Bernie nodded, showing a genuine interest, "What's your angle?"

Serena raised her eyebrow, pleased that Bernie; with no prior warning and not really knowing how their lunch had gone; was really trying.

Elinor, thawed slightly, given the interest shown and remembering what her Mum had said about Bernie agreeing with her regards their relationship. "Realistic, front line. No scene setting or fluffy stuff. Showing the NHS as it is, warts and all, as it were."

"Sounds… interesting. Happy to support if you need anything." Bernie said with a genuine tone.

Elinor smiled and Serena watched as she could see the effort Bernie was making, she knew it was genuine but also hard for Bernie.

Elinor smiled as the silence was cut by Bernie's pager, she looked down at the screen "Duty calls, excuse me; Ms Campbell, Elinor." She swept out of the room. _Saved by the bell._

As Bernie left and closed the door Mother and Daughter exchanged looks.

"So, what do you think?"

"To be fair mum, if she doesn't turn out to be a complete arsehole, I think you might be punching above your weight; she's fit right."

Serena wanted the ground to swallow her as she went the deepest shade of crimson as she reflected on the fact that she had really had landed the formidable and gorgeous Berenice Wolfe.


	12. Chapter 15

In the short time since Bernie's return they had fallen into a routine, which was not really routine. They worked around their shifts and Jason's schedule. On the plus side Jason liked Bernie and having her around as she was considerably more interesting than Auntie Serena, all he asked was that he knew the days Bernie was staying over; the night she turned up after he went to bed really threw him when he got up and he realised she was there. That wasn't really a big ask and as far as Serena was concerned she loved the fact that Jason liked Bernie and she saw her as a bit of a buffer between the two of them. Bernie would offer to play scrabble or Othello with Jason whilst Serena prepared their dinner. Then there was the quiz shows, the endless quiz shows. She loved how Jason and Bernie would compete on University Challenge but then team up for Pointless. She loved nothing more than hearing them share a joke and their hearty laughs ring out in unison. It was wonderful to hear.

Bernie reflected on the last few weeks, she was content, even with the sense of routine. It was always easier for her to stay at Serena's because of Jason and his schedule, but she had no objections. Serena's house was homely, her flat was not. Serena was an excellent cook, a bit of a feeder in fact. Then there was Jason, she could not help but like him, his honesty and straight shooting; no second guessing. She liked that.

Serena had not mentioned moving in, or keys and for that Bernie was glad, the arrangement as it stood was great. She had some things of hers at Serena's and Jason had bought her a mug with a 'B' on it to match the 'J' and 'S' mugs he and Serena had. So far the only time she had felt like running it was a 20 minute run around Serena's estate, always returning to a loving look and a warm shower. Serena thought it was bonkers that within a couple of weeks Bernie had mapped several runs starting at her flat and ending at Serena's house, and even a couple of runs starting and ending at Serena's. Bernie rationalised by explaining that it was her escape, thinking time; Serena preferred a glass of Shiraz and some Strauss playing very loudly. Bernie liked to run. Serena accepted this on the condition that the running always ended at her house, not in 'fucking Ukraine.'

Thursday night was approaching and secretly both Bernie and Serena were looking forward to this more than other nights they spent together. Firstly, they were both off on Friday; this was rare but not unwelcome. Secondly, by serendipity; or maybe by design; Jason had decided to stay at Alan's that night and would not be back until late afternoon on Friday.

Bernie was sitting in the office thinking about Thursday. _I should offer to take Serena out to dinner, like a date…. No, too cheesy… mmmm… we haven't really had a date and I've already shagged her, urrgh. I haven't dated since…. Forever… bollocks! What to do…._

Bernie sat looking at her computer monitor but not seeing her list of emails screaming to be opened. She opened the web browser to look for a nice restaurant to see if she could book something online. She remembered Jason telling her to look for deals and vouchers off if she ever thought about taking Auntie Serena out for a meal… maybe that was his way at hinting that Serena would like to be taken out… _Yes, that was Jason dropping a big hint without actually saying, "So when are you going to take Auntie Serena out on a date."_

With this realisation she threw herself into the task of finding a superb place and remembering to check for deals. She ate her lunch 'el desko' totally absorbed in her task as Serena walked in.

Serena was surprised to find Bernie eating lunch and typing away at her computer. Bernie was not a technophobe but give her the choice of a keyboard or a scalpel, scalpel would win out every time. "May I suggest that if you are tackling the metaphorical mountain that is your email inbox you sort by 'received from' rather than date. Then you can start at the most important; me…" She raised her eyebrow, "Hanssen, Ric, Jac." She rolled her eyes, "and so on. You find you will be able to totally delete some drivel as generally you will be copied into the same mail several times."

Bernie looked up and smiled a grateful thanks. She had cleared some emails several days earlier having sorted by subject and sending quite a bit to the delete folder, but for every one she deleted three more appeared. "Thanks Serena, thought I best get on top of it, turn a new page." She smiled to reassure Serena that she had turned a corner… to a degree.

"Need any help?"

"No, no; just fine. But please, do I have to read your mails?" She winked at Serena knowing full well that Serena kept the emails to an absolute minimum knowing she didn't read them, generally they were emails to others that Bernie was copied into as the AAU co lead, adding clout to anything Serena sent out; showing the united front. As they shared an office and ran the AAU so well she was certain she did not have to worry about the Serena emails.

Serena waved her hand absently knowing Bernie had no intention of reading her mails. "I am off for lunch with Ric; seems the acting CEO needs a soundboard; no doubt to have a bit of a whinge, but a free lunch is a free lunch. Pager is on if I'm needed or you feel the need to rescue me."

"Sure, I'll bear that in mind." Bernie draw breath to prepare for some bad acting, "So are we shooting off on time tomorrow?" she said as casually as she could muster.

Serena winked, pleased that it seemed that Bernie was as excited about tomorrow night as she was, "All being well and 'old red' remaining quiet." Nodding her head towards the red phone on the wall.

Bernie smiled as Serena headed out to meet Ric and she resumed her search for her perfect 'first date'.


	13. Chapter 16

Granted Bernie had sought help from Jason but she finally sorted a table for Thursday. Received the table confirmation to her phone and thought about how to tell Serena she was taking her out. _Grand gesture, nah. Surprise? Did Serena even like surprises?_

She decided on the direct approach, she pressed forward on the mail and sent it to Serena's work email with one simple sentence.

"Be ready for 7.15 pm see you later gorgeous. Bx." With that she exited their office knowing she would be in theatre for the next hour or so and Serena would see the email by then.

When Serena returned to the office habit was to check her mails first, as she only got to check them sporadically depending on the pace on AAU. She raised an eyebrow as she saw an email from Bernie. _Why would Bernie email. She hates emails. She would see her soon._ Curiosity getting the better of her she opened the email with the subject "Hi".

Serena looked at the mail and scrolled down to the reservation confirmation. He hand clapped over her mouth in shock. _How did she know that she was dying to go there… but it was a little romantic French bistro. Gosh, this is a date. A Bernie date._ Butterflies overtook Serena's stomach. Her shift was due to end in 5 minutes and Bernie was deep in surgery. She only hoped that Bernie finished in time for their date. _Stop it Campbell, stop dreaming of dates, it is just dinner for god's sake._ She fired off a text to Bernie knowing that replying to the email would be pointless.

"7.15 prompt Major, can't wait! Sx"

Serena dashed off the ward to allow herself ample time to make herself at least a degree presentable, if not the gorgeous that Bernie thought she was.

Bernie came out of surgery at 6pm, an hour after her shift was supposed to end, luckily if she could get out of the hospital within 10 minutes she was not at all worried about time for tonight. Table was booked for 8pm. She had her outfit sorted and most of her overnight stuff was at Serena's. Sorted. She bid goodbye to the troops and pulled her phone out of her pocket as she walked into the lift. She smiled at the message from Serena. _Girl done good it seems._ She smirked to herself. Quick text back, "Just out, see you shortly. Bx"

Serena was nervously pacing the kitchen at 7.10pm, shiraz in hand taking a nervous gulp.

Doorbell. _Shit, hold your nerve, its only Bernie._

Serena goes for the door.

Bernie pulls her car on the drive, knowing the taxi she ordered for 7.30pm will be here soon she heads for the door with a feeling of trepidation. _Pull yourself together Major. It's Serena, it will be fine._

The door opened and any nerves held by either woman soon dispelled.

Bernie couldn't hide her happiness and surprise at how gorgeous Serena looked. "You look stunning 'Rena." Bernie stated as she crossed the threshold to Serena's home.

Serena blushed as she held the door open for Bernie, shutting it swiftly behind her, "Not looking too shabby yourself Ms Wolfe."

Bernie leaned in for a kiss, Serena leaned back; "I don't want you to ruin my makeup, it took ages." Bernie beamed so wide the smile nearly split her face as she chuckled. Kissing Serena's forehead, "I suppose I can mess up your make up later Campbell."

At that the horn of the taxi sounded, "Your chariot awaits m'lady." She said as she grabbed Serena's hand. Serena had the feeling Bernie would be keeping hold all night.

The arrived at the French restaurant and Bernie confidently lead the way as the waiter showed them to an intimate booth with a candle on the table. It really was romantic and both ladies felt a little overawed that they were there, together, in this setting. They were snapped back to reality by the waiter handing both food and wine menus over. He indicated he would return shortly for their drink order.

Bernie looked at Serena with a shade of embarrassment, "This is where you shine Darling, I can't read French."

Serena smiled sympathetically. "Would you like me to read the menu to you?"

Bernie smiled and held out her hand for Serena to take over the table. "You pick the wine. If you could read out the food menu…"

The waiter returned and although the waiter spoke English, Serena ordered their wine in fluent French. Bernie listened and although not understanding was totally in awe as she found it quite a turn on to listen to Serena talk French.

Wine ordered Serena picked up the food menu with her free hand and read out the dishes and then described each in English. Bernie decided quickly what she wanted so that she could then focus on Serena reading out the rest of the menu. As the waiter returned with the wine he asked if they were ready to order. Serena nodded as she asked Bernie her choices, "The first starter and main you read out darling," she said as she squeezed Serena's hand. She ordered the food and the waiter retreated.

"So, did you make me read the whole bloody menu Wolfe?"

Bernie smiled a wicked grin as she took a sip of wine. "Never realised how much of a turn on the French language was until just now, you make French chicken sound really sexy." She laughed.

Serena returned her laugh. "So do you speak any languages; and no, knowing what liver is in Ukrainian doesn't count."

"In that case then, no." She gave a hearty laugh.

"Not even after your tours of duty?"

"No not really, I know the odd conversational nugget and necessary medical terms, but otherwise I am fairly English and ignorant."

The starter arrived and conversation flowed easily, even for Bernie. She was more of a listener and was happy to take in the information Serena was imparting. Learning that Serena spoke French and Italian fluently and knew enough Spanish to get by.

The food was spectacular and they ended up sharing their starters as Serena went into detail about French cuisine and culture. Bernie loved that Serena seemed in her element.

Serena had been on a few dates in her time, even as recently as Robbie, but this, hands down was the best date. Bernie who, Serena learned that night, had not been on a date in over 25 years; had pulled it out of the bag. Serena felt special. Bernie had been chivalrous, complementary, attentive, interested and everything in between. Serena felt like she had taken over the conversation but it seemed that Bernie was happy to listen as she talked. Serena asked Bernie lots of questions and she answered with a level of conversation Serena rarely saw. She must be comfortable. It was heaven. She knew then that she wanted to ensure that this night was perfect for Bernie too. Not realising that Bernie already thought it was perfect.

As the plates for the main were taken away they were drifting through topics with ease; favourite books, phobias, bad habits, favourite movies, university, guilty pleasures, car history (that was more Bernie's topic); and many more. The fact that the hospital, the kids, the exes, Ukraine… reality, never entered the sphere of conversation was the best thing of all; it was testament that they had something outside of all of these things.

The second bottle of wine was going down with ease and they did not feel rushed to make a decision on dessert. Bernie asked Serena to read the desserts out, just for fun, as she asked her to pick their desserts while she nipped to the ladies. On the way she went via the bar to put her card behind the bar for the bill.

Bernie arrived back at the table to find a selection of French desserts. She smiled as Serena shrugged "I couldn't decide so I got the sharing platter." She smiled coyly.

Bernie beamed, "Good choice, now you have to tell me everything we have here…. In French."

They both laughed and started to sample the desserts, Serena feeding Bernie fork fulls of various things; clafoutis, crème brulee, crepe suzette. Bernie felt stirrings as the whole dessert affairs was getting her a little worked up. She gave Serena a look and Serena picked it up immediately. "Carnal thoughts Major?" She said in a hushed tone.

Bernie tipped her head and smiled. "Can you ask for them to call us a cab Darling?"

Serena ushered over a waiter and spoke as he then went away and returned with Bernie's card and confirmed that the taxi would be outside in a few minutes.

Serena looked at Bernie open mouthed at the fact she had paid for the meal already and went to object. "No Serena, my treat, first date and all. I owe you that at least."

Bernie stood and offered her hand to Serena as she left the booth.

"No arguments?" Serena queried.

"No arguments." Bernie confirmed.

"In that case, 'Home James, and don't spare the horses.'"


	14. Chapter 17

As the taxi pulled up, Bernie paid the taxi driver as Serena went to open the door. Bernie was close behind as she swung the door open. Bernie put her arms around Serena and spun her around quickly into a kiss. Serena hummed loudly in surprise, which sent shockwaves through Bernie.

Bernie tried to keep her composure as they removed coats, shoes and bags; ensuring that they closed the door behind them. _Christ, Serena could read a council tax bill to me and I would be a puddle on the floor. Calm down Wolfe!_

The kiss and their passion deepened as they stood embraced in the hallway, hands exploring. "You drive me crazy, Campbell!"

"Better than being crazy Campbell I suppose."

"Most definitely."

Their words being pushed out in breaths between kisses.

"Drink?" Serena asked.

"Mmmm" replied Bernie mid kiss.

Serena broke the kiss to get the drinks, she slapped Bernie's arse and nodded to her bedroom door as she dropped a kiss on her cheek.

Bernie did not need telling twice, she ascended the staircase and entered the bedroom. I smelt of fresh bedding and….. Serena.

Mere moments late Serena entered with 2 wine glasses expertly held in one hand and a bottle of Shiraz in the other.

She set them down and poured as Bernie came up behind her, pushing her body into Serena's back and kissing the back of her neck.

Serena turned around holding glasses for them both. "I propose a toast, to us."

"To us." Bernie smiled, again grateful that Serena had managed to put the past behind her; something Bernie was still wrangling with. _I know I'm fucking lucky she is even giving me the time of day._

She quickly snapped out of it and clinked glasses with Serena and took a large sip.

Serena placed her glass on the bedside table and took Bernie's, then pushed her down on to the bed in one swift move. Bernie was taken by surprise, but in a nice way. Dominant Serena certainly was a turn on. Before she knew it Serena was straddled over her on the bed. Bernie did not think that her body could take any more. One more move, kiss, breath from Serena may cause her to orgasm spectacularly. _How could she have such an effect on her?_

Serena leaned down to press against Bernie's body and put her lips to her right ear, "Tonight is about you Bernie, I want you, I want to pleasure you, tell me what you want." Any nerves Serena had seemed to have left her as she felt a sudden confidence, a real urge to Show Bernie how she felt about her.

"I want you, just you." Bernie managed to stammer out, barely holding on to her senses.

Serena kissed Bernie deeply, exploring her mouth with her tongue. As she did so she gestured for Bernie to lift from the bed a little so that she could remove her top. Her hands deftly took care of the clasp on her bra as both items flew to the wayside as Serena surveyed the sight before her. Her hands running from Bernie's collarbone right down to her hips, via her breasts. It was as if she was creating a memory, taking every detail of Bernie's body down.

Bernie lay back as she watched the events before her, Serena was above her applying a gentle touch to parts of her body that nobody, not even Bernie herself, had even considered as touch worthy, never mind the attention that Serena was paying.

Bernie was now certain that there was a difference between sex and making love. This was most certainly the latter. Something she feels she had not really been the recipient of before. She had shown Serena love, something she had never found easy with Marcus, certainly not with Alex. Whatever she had with Alex was born from a life on tour. They may have thought it was something more then, but now she knew that the intimacy she had with Alex was something different, not at all on this level. She reflected that she did not regret the affair with Alex; after all she certainly would not be in Serena Campbell's bed otherwise. She would most certainly still be in the Army trying to escape the façade that was her marriage to Marcus.

Serena placed a kiss to Bernie's lips bringing her back to the moment. "Are you OK darling you looked a bit…" Serena was trying not to worry but she did wonder if Bernie had drifted into boredom or maybe she did not like what she was doing.

"Overwhelmed a bit… if I am honest." She said, truly honestly as she responded to Serena's kiss.

"You, you are…" Serena questioned.

Bernie tipped her head and gave a half smile, "Yes Ms Campbell." She paused, "People like me, don't end up with people like you."

Serena stroked her face, "Yes they bloody do; now if you don't mind I would quite like to continue basking in your beauty." The first part of her sentence serious, the second part a little more jovial. She did not wait for an answer from Bernie as she started to place kisses from her lips, to her neck, and downwards until she reached Bernie's breasts, taking one in her hand. The other side she smothered in swelling kisses before taking the nipple in her mouth and sucking, feeling it firm in her mouth. Bernie moaned in pleasure which gave Serena goose bumps.

Things quickly escalated as Serena allowed Bernie to sit up so that she could remove her blouse and bra, in between deep passionate kisses. They readjusted on the bed as trousers and underwear were removed in a frenzy of hands and fumbles.

Once completely naked Serena took control again by reassuming her position astride Bernie, there were no objections from the Major as Serena slid her thigh between Bernie's legs and lowered her body to Bernie's.

"Is this OK?" She asked, nerves showing through the confident passion she was exuding.

Bernie responded by placing her hands on Serena's arse and kissing deeply with a smile.

Serena took this as a positive and lifted slightly as she rolled her hips into Bernie, the response was a deep moan from Bernie. _One to remember for the future!_

She focused on Bernie's glistening skin, she really was beautiful. She kissed down Bernie's body, making focus on any feature, blemish, scar, birthmark; that made Bernie, Bernie.

She reached the most recent scar from the IED injury, she gently traced it with her fingers followed by kisses. Bernie took an intake of breath and Serena looked up to check that it was ok. Bernie smiled, "You are kissing my scars!" She whispered. She was surprised. Again no one before Serena had paid any attention to her imperfections, in fact they were avoided; which is why Bernie was surprised when her body reacted as it did to those kisses and touches.

"Yes." Serena stated matter of factly. "I love you, all of you." She continued to explore and kiss working her way down Bernie's body. The tensions within both ladies heightening as Serena reached Bernie's pelvis and thighs.

Serena took in the sight, Bernie was turned on, her body writhing to her touch. Her core was alight and Serena could see and smell her arousal, this was new, unchartered territory for her; but surprisingly she was not as afraid as she thought she might be.

She repositioned her body further down the bed so that her mouth was between Bernie's legs. She was kissing up Bernie's thighs. As she kissed she saw more scars, these scars were older, faint, smaller, slightly rough. Serena took an educated guess at the origin of these scars; they may have been the result of Bernie's years in the army, but they were not injuries caused by weapons or bombs, these injuries were closer to home. She kissed them anyway; when it came to Bernie's blemishes they were treated indiscriminately as they all contributed to who Bernie was now, the Bernie she knew and loved. As she kissed these scars she felt Bernie shift and heard a sound that came from Bernie but she could not place what it meant. She looked up to see Bernie sitting up on her elbows wearing a shocked face. "Serena, you don't need to kiss those scars…. I'm not proud of…" She could not finish her sentence as a tear slid down her face.

Serena immediately came to face Bernie, her face an inch away. She wiped Bernie's tear away, "Yes I do. I love you, just as you are. Everything you are, everything you have been. It's about time I showed you." She kissed Bernie as she pushed her down to the bed, "Relax my darling," She whispered as she assumed her previous position.

Her kisses led closer to Bernie's core, she could tell Bernie was worked up, ready to pop. She leaned her ear against Bernie's thigh as she took her fingers and ran them through Bernie's flaps. Wet and warm. Bernie reacted to her touch as she threw her arm over her mouth to stifle the cries and moans that would inevitably follow. Serena worked like a surgeon with precision as she discovered the key to Bernie's core. She worked he fingers around Bernie's opening as she kissed Bernie's thigh. She then pushed inside of Bernie. "WOW" Serena exclaimed. This was purely involuntary, her exclamation was met with something similar from the woman who was now sinking into the bed in ecstasy, "Fucking hell Serena!"

Serena's fingers moved in and out, pushing further in, exploring, finding that the slightest move by her fingers did wonderful things to the woman she loves. "Fuck me," Bernie cried out as Serena quickened the pace. She had the urge to taste Bernie, an urge she could no longer resist. She lifted her head and whilst still working with her fingers she took in a deep breath taking in the erotic smell emanating from Bernie's core. Between her own legs she was throbbing and felt as if she would come at any moment.

As her tongue made contact with Bernie's clit she felt herself go, her release uncontained as she lapped up Bernie's juices. She felt Bernie's muscles contracting around her fingers as Bernie came hard. Serena continued to work her with mouth until Bernie had ridden the wave of her orgasm. Serena looked up to see that Bernie now had a pillow over her face and was breathing heavily.

Serena moved up to be level with Bernie as she attempted to move the pillow. Bernie had a tight grip on it, not willing to move it just yet.

"Are you OK darling?" Serena asked, a little worried she had hurt or upset Bernie.

A noise of reassurance came from behind the pillow, her arms releasing their grip a little.

Serena grabbed the pillow so that she could see Bernie's face, but Bernie turned her head away from Serena's gaze. "I'm sorry, just need a minute."

Serena gently moved Bernie's face so that she could see. Bernie had tears rolling down her face and her face was red. Bernie knew she had to try to explain to Serena, even though she did not understand herself, she wanted Serena to know that this was the singular most amazing moment of her life; "I'm sorry love, that was amazing, I'm just so…. "She blew out a breath not knowing what word to use, as there were none. "I'm just recovering. Are you OK?"

Serena smiled and leaned in for a kiss as she wiped away Bernie's tears. "That was breath taking."

Bernie now seemed a little more levelled as she embraced Serena and bought her head to rest on her chest. Serena could hear Bernie's heart going ten to the dozen as she drew the covers over their naked bodies.

They settled into slumber easily, exhausted from the emotion of the evening. Both thinking that they had never been as happy as they were in that moment.


	15. Chapter 18

Serena awoke realising that the bed was cold. Instinctively she felt and it confirmed that Bernie was not there. She looked at the clock, 5.04 am. Her stomach lurched. _Where is Bernie?_

She got up and pulled on some clothes, noticing that Bernie's clothing was not on the floor where it had been thrown a few hours ago. _I do hope she hasn't fucking bolted out._

Serena shook the thought from her head as she went downstairs.

She went through the kitchen and living room until she saw that the patio door was ajar. She could make out a figure sitting on the bench in the distance. She pulled on some trainers and a coat to venture out.

Serena sat next to Bernie, a whiskey glass and ashtray between them. Serena eyed the cigarette packet and knew it was the one Bernie had nursed for a few weeks now as there was a telephone number scribbled roughly on the front. She did wonder what the number was; secretly worrying it was a booty call, or Alex.

They sat in silence for a few minutes. Bernie took a last drag and stubbed out the cigarette in the ashtray, "Last one, I promise." She said forlornly.

Serena placed a hand on Bernie's hand. "Why are we out here Bern?" She made emphasis on the 'we' to ensure that Bernie realised that whatever this was, she was not on her own.

Bernie gave Serena a tired look. Not knowing what to say. She had downed a few whiskies before Serena's appearance and was now feeling the effects with the cold air hitting her. "I, ah, I can't explain… not just now." She sighed, "I… I um, I'm sorry."

"Please try." Serena squeezed Bernie's hand to offer reassurance.

Bernie sighed. _How the fuck to do explain this? Christ I can't get my own head around how I feel. She is going to run a million miles in the opposite direction._

"I couldn't sleep darling, I did not want to disturb you so I came out here."

Serena looked her in the eye and then glanced at the ash tray and empty glass.

"Don't play me for a fool Major."

Bernie looked up with shame written on her face. _What could be so wrong?_

"It's stupid; I um, yes, occasionally I have dreams, nightmares, flashbacks; whatever you call them. Sleep and I are not comfortable bedfellows."

Serena paid attention to Bernie's words realising how hard it was for her to open up. She stayed silent hoping that now that Bernie felt able to speak that words would flow easier.

"I try to cope with it, I do cope with it."

Serena placed a kiss to Bernie's forehead. "Darling, I'm here, I am here. You are not alone OK."

Bernie gave a sad smile, "You do help, it hasn't been as bad since…. Since you… but um…"

Serena nodded, she understood as much as she could at this point. Some pieces fitting together. She knew that there was more to Bernie than the exterior put to show, but she loved her irrespective. Whatever the package was, she loved this woman and knew that they needed each other.

"I'm here." She reinforced, "Shall we go inside?" She held Bernie's hand and made to get up, a move mirrored by her partner. _If we are going to discuss this I need to be warm._

Serena led Bernie to the sofa and then switched on the kettle, a force of habit, quintessentially British behaviour; in times of trouble have a cup of tea.

She entered the living room with 2 mugs and placed Bernie's in front of her as she cupped hers in both hands in an effort to get warm.

They sat in another comfortable silence before Serena decided to take the plunge and risk delving into the mind of Major Berenice Wolfe. "The dreams, what triggers them?"

Serena had not known what question would leave her lips but she had gone with instinct. If something triggered this, she wanted to know, she wanted to stop it.

Bernie had obviously registered the question but remained silent. Her mind searching for the right words.

"If I knew," She sighed, "If I only knew, I don't. It's, it's hard to explain love."

"I understand."

Bernie shifted like a weight had been lifted, "I know, I just wish I could make it go away or at least…"

"You don't have to." Serena stroked Bernie's cheek.

"I am better, better than I was. I have been better since you, since I've been back."

"Since you've been back?" Serena queried, wondering if back meant back from the army or back from Kiev.

Bernie dipped her head so that her hair fell in front of her face, "I shouldn't have left."

Those four words told Serena everything. But she did wonder what triggered tonight's episode. What had happened to trigger this, Bernie had said that she helped, so surely it stands to reason that she would be safe from the nightmares here. But she wasn't.

Suddenly Serena's heart sank to the centre of the earth. Had she caused this? _Bernie was clearly emotional when I kissed her scars, all of them. Have I done more harm than good? Those scars she is not proud of, those scars that tell a story she is not ready to share? Fuck! Opening a can of worms Campbell!_

"Bernie?" Serena queried apprehensively.

Bernie looked her in the eyes, "Yes."

"Did, I er, did I cause this tonight?" The last part of Serena's sentence rushed out but it was clear, she blamed herself for Bernie's hurt.

Bernie drew Serena close to her as she exhaled loudly and leaned her head back. "No, no, no, Serena you are the best thing to happen to me in forever; please believe that. I just well, I'm this. I'm sorry."

"No apologies needed."

Bernie squeezed Serena tighter, "I'm tired, really tired. I'm sorry. Can we go to bed?" A long yawn followed.

"Lead the way Major."


	16. Chapter 19

They went back to bed and in a reverse of their usual position it was Serena who held Bernie. Held her close to her heart, exuding love and comfort. Serena was in no place to sleep, her mind ticking over. _How can I help Bernie? Can I make this go away?_

Serena stroked Bernie's blond curls as she felt Bernie's breath go shallow as she drifted into slumber. Serena must have fallen asleep at some point as she opened her eyes and it was nearly 10am. Thankfully Jason was not here as the events of the last 12 hours would have thrown his routine and quite frankly she was not sure how she would have explained it all to him. I mean she was not even sure herself. _Was it PTSD? Was it something else? What would Bernie say it was? If it was anything at all._

As she pondered she felt Bernie stir. Bernie kissed Serena's collarbone and looked up. _What an amazing woman. My Serena. My rock._ She gave a sad grin, "Sorry about last night… this morning."

Serena shook her head, kissed Bernie's forehead and pulled her close. "You have nothing to apologise for my wonderful Bernie. I just want you to know, I am here, and you are not alone. You can trust me and tell me anything OK?"

"Thank you," She whispered behind tears, "I really don't deserve you."

"Ah you see major, that's where you are wrong. You do deserve me, you deserve to be loved and cared for; that is what I am here to do." She kissed Bernie tenderly, this kiss reciprocated by the grateful blond.

"Serena?"

"Yes."

"Do you have any questions about what happened?"

Serena looked, as if contemplating how to approach this. "No, not specifically, I would not know what to ask. I really only have one thing to ask of you."

"Anything." Bernie said quickly.

"Just be honest with me. Good or bad, or ugly. Be honest. If you need me I am here. If you need space, let me know. If you need anything of me all you have to do is say. I do not know how I can help, but I will with every fibre of my being because I love you and do not want to see you hurt."

Bernie took in a breath, could this woman be any more perfect. Serena did not know how grateful Bernie was for those words. Sometimes she did need the space. Sometimes she needed to be held and there was no knowing until that moment.

 _And she loves me!_

Bernie took Serena's face in her hands. "Thank you darling. I am blessed to have you. I promise I will be honest and try to let you in when I can, but you know that is not always easy for me, but I will try because I love you and do not want to see you hurt at my hands ever again."

Serena opened and closed her mouth, for Bernie to say that, no stammer, no hesitation, no tripping over words, wearing her heart on her sleeve; was a real feat. She had no hesitation when she said she loved Serena either. Serena knew that would not have been easy for Bernie unless she was so absolutely certain in her feelings that she could say it with no fear or hesitation.

They joined lips in the softest passionate kiss, a kiss of pure love, akin to something from a fairy tale. Their bodies already entwined seemed to twist into one as they proceeded run their hands over each other. Serena rolled on top of Bernie, after her taste of it last night she decided she liked it, a lot. As she straddled Bernie and planted kisses to her neckline she whispered, "I do love you Berenice Wolfe, I should have told you sooner."

"Ditto Frauline." Bernie exhaled.

Serena felt the passion within both of them as these declarations of love were reaffirmed but she needed to check, just because of the emotion of the last few hours and her sill having that feeling that her actions last night might have triggered something within Bernie. "Are you ok with this? With us, making love now?"

Bernie looked quizzically at Serena, but wanted to ensure that the connection between them was not lost as she dealt with this exchange. She rolled her hips into Serena, "I rather think that making love to you is an excellent form of therapy for whatever it is that's going on up here." She points to her temple with her index finger. The mood was not lost as they revelled in foreplay for a considerable time.

Serena did like foreplay, she loved foreplay with Bernie. It was a luxury she certainly was not afforded with Edward and as for Robbie his idea of foreplay was a Chinese and a bottle of shiraz.

Bernie loved the feel of Serena atop of her, as much as she liked being on top of Serena. Versatility, something she did not have a lot of experience of. Sex with Marcus was never love making, it was missionary position marriage sex passing as love making. The only thing she got from sex with Marcus was Cam and Charlotte, that sweetened the pill a little. As for Alex, the passion was there, yes, it was, but in retrospect that was all it was. Furtive moments, secret liaisons, passion that was a sticking plaster over a bigger wound. Things with Serena were different. Even after this short time she knew that Serena was the best lover she had ever had. The woman was a tease and a flirt, it seems, from what Bernie knew, she always had been. She had to laugh at the relationship between Ric and Serena; nothing had ever gone on there, maybe they were too similar. Both knowing the other so well. Bernie did not mind Serena's flirty nature, it was sexy; especially to think that when it came down to it Serena did not let just anyone into her bed. Bernie knew how bloody lucky she was to be there now, and hopefully forever.

Bernie slipped off Serena's pyjama top as Serena sat up atop her rolling her hips as she undid the buttons on Bernie's pyjama shirt. Now both topless Serena leaned down so that their breasts made contact. Kissing Bernie deeply she reached down to remove Bernie's pants. Bernie wore girl boxers which Serena found a big turn on. _My big macho army medic!_

Now naked Bernie thought it only fair to even things out as she continued to kiss Serena as she removed her pyjama bottoms and thong in one movement. _Serena in a thong, fucking hell. Little minx doesn't look the type._

Their bodies moved in unison, Bernie lifting her knee to get contact with her thigh on Serena's wetness. Serena rolled her hips and moaned into their deep kiss. Bernie smiled. Discovering Serena's body was something she would never tire of. She felt Serena grab her hips in order to direct some contact to Bernie's core as she could feel it pulsating with desire. The kiss broke as both were in waves of orgasm from the contact at their cores. Their slow love making quickened pace as they felt the peak of orgasm approaching.

They came almost simultaneously. Serena collapsed onto Bernie in post coital bliss. Bernie tapped out on Serena's back and rolled her onto the bed next to her. "Woah, frauline that was…." She laughed heartily.

"Yes Major, that was… "

They kissed.

"Are you OK." Serena asked more seriously.

"Yes, yes I think so darling. You."

"If you are, then yes I am."

They lay for a moment, enjoying the moment and the silence. Bernie did like that silence was not uncomfortable for them. She needed it sometimes.

"What do you want to do today?" Serena asked, realising it was already lunchtime.

"Dunno, food? A walk maybe?"

Serena smiled. "Lazy stroll to town for a mooch around and lunch?"

"Solid gold plan."

They lay a few more moments and Serena looked Bernie in the eye, she went to speak, changed her mind and then changed it again. "Bernie."

"Yes."

"The smoking, you know I don't mind right?"

Bernie looked at her. Not knowing what to say, they were both doctors after all. They both knew the health implications, same to be said for the alcohol intake in that respect. It was not really about the smoking. Marcus had always abhorred her smoking. Made her quit after her last tour. Bernie was very much a person that the more someone did not want you to do something, the more she did it.

"I know."

"If it offers you the same comfort as I get from a shiraz I V, you know I won't judge. I am not your keeper Bernie."

"I know."

"We all have coping mechanisms Bernie and if yours is sitting my garden with a ciggie and a scotch… that's OK because you are here, safe. I will be by your side. Whether it is physically or emotionally, whatever you need. Always here."

Bernie smiled. "I do have something to show you, I want your opinion."

She reached over to the bedside table for her cigarette packet, "Don't worry not going to spark up." She turned the packet over to the number scribbled on the front. "This number," She taps the pack, "It's a counselling service for ex-military."

Serena props herself up on her elbow and holds the hand Bernie is holding the cigarette packet in to show her support.

"Not sure if I qualify. I am here, surviving, intact. I do not feel worthy of this kind of help."

Serena looked Bernie square in the eyes. "If you have this number, you are worthy. Don't be scared"

"Can we call later? I want you there."

Serena nods, "Whatever you need love. Now I don't know about you but I need to eat soon. Let's get this show on the road."

"Lets." Bernie responded as she planted a kiss on Serena's lips, a silent thanks for the support. They proceeded to get up and dressed to bask in the rest of their day off.


	17. Chapter 20

They were up and about to go out. Bernie was through the door keen to get some fresh air and food. Serena was by the door messing about in her handbag.

"What are you doing?" Bernie asked with a joking impatience.

"I'm trying to find my house keys." She emphasised the word 'trying' and casually dropping the next sentence, "Why don't you use your key to lock up." She was smirking at Bernie's confused look.

"My key?"

"Yes your key."

"To your house."

"Yes, where else."

Bernie pulled out her keys and saw a new key on the fob, she held it up, stepped forward and tried it in the lock. I really was a key to Serena's house. She locked the door and turned around. Serena was right there. "Bernie, I hope it's OK. I don't want to scare you and I am not asking you to move in." _Yet!_ "But you are here a lot and I want you to feel you are able to come and go as you please. Treat it like home."

Bernie kissed Serena, "Thank you, this means a lot. But, um, Jason; is he OK with it?"

Serena grabbed her hand, "It was his idea Bernie. He said it was stupid that he had to keep answering the door to you whilst he is watching television."

They both laughed.

As they strolled they maintained a comfortable silence. Each thinking about the key gesture. Not only from Serena, but Jason too. Serena was so proud of Jason, accepting Bernie and accepting, embracing, the change.

Bernie was overwhelmed at how things had worked out and she wanted to get herself fully sorted, at least not for these two wonderful people who wanted her. _Fuck up, damaged and recently retired long distance, emotional runner._ Serena had only stopped her flat a couple of times; mainly because of Jason's schedule but mainly because Bernie's flat was a base camp, a place to lay your head and store your stuff. Serena's place was a home. A safe haven.

Serena squeezed Bernie's hand as they walked as Bernie quite possibly had not seen they had reached a main road to cross. She seemed to be deep in thought. "Penny for them Major?"

"Ah, you caught me. I zoned out a little." Serena was worried it might be about the dreams/flashbacks and the impending step that Bernie is taking with calling the help line. "I was just thinking about the key."

"Yes?" Serena queried wondering if it was good or bad.

"Did you think giving me a key would freak me out and make me want to run again?"

"It was a worry, yes."

They crossed the road and Bernie considered her next sentence carefully, they reached a bench and Bernie guided Serena to sit as she held Serena's hand with both of hers. "Well, I told you the truth when I said I do not want to run anymore. You made me realise that. Yes I was scared but I think domestic bliss with you could be something I could get used to. Not ready for pipe and slippers just yet, but I love what we have. What we have with Jason too. I feel like I can get my head sorted and build bridges with Cam and Charlotte; and it is all down to you. I could not feel like this, or do this without you."

Serena sat stunned, she was glad she was sitting otherwise her legs may have given way. Bernie brushed a tear running down Serena's face' "I was not, um, I didn't want to upset you."

"You haven't" Serena smiled. Just happy. "Happy you feel able to open up to me Bern."

"Well, thought it could be, um, a new thing for me. It seems to work around you."

Serena smiled as she stood from the bench, following Bernie's lead. She linked her arm, "Come on, and let me treat you to lunch. I know how showing your emotions makes you hungry." She laughed as they walked.

Bernie burst into laughter, "You know me well Frauline."


	18. Chapter 21

Serena opened the front door, the house was in silence. Jason and Bernie were both due back soon. Jason was with Alan and Bernie had worked an earlier shift to enable her to attend her first counselling session. They had not spoken much about it since Bernie made a call for a referral and Serena certainly did not want to push. She did not know if Bernie would want to discuss it when she got back, that one she would pay by ear.

Serena decided to potter about and tidy the house whilst she was alone, she entered the living room to make a start and saw Bernie lying on the sofa her eyes closed and her I pod on. She looked so peaceful sleeping and decided not to wake her; momentarily dwelling on the amount of sleep over the years Bernie had lost out on. She more than deserved her sleep now.

She leaned down to place a soft kiss on her forehead. She raised up and as she went to walk away Bernie grabbed her wrist and opened her eyes.

"Darling, I am sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"You didn't." Bernie confirmed, pulling out her headphones, "I would have gone for a run but the weather is not up to it and I feel a bit drained." She lifted her head for Serena to sit and then set her head in her lap.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Mmmm, later maybe. It was alright, just tiring."

Serena nodded, "Jason will be home soon so the usual. I understand if you want to go home, or be alone."

"I am home Serena. Food and quiz shows might be what I need."

She sat up and caught Serena in a kiss. Sorry if I am a bit…. Um, distant. I just need time."

"It's alright darling, main thing is you are OK."

"I am, yeah, I'm OK."

Serena smiled. "I suppose I better get dinner on the go, his lordship will be tapping his watch when he gets back."

She stands, goes over to the kitchen and starts to chop up some vegetables. Bernie followed in a few minutes later and wrapped her arms around Serena's midriff and rested her chin on Serena's shoulder.

"I hope you are not trying to distract me Ms. Wolfe."

"No, no, would I?" She kisses Serena's neck. "Good news, things with Hanssen went better than I thought."

"Really?" Serena had spoken candidly with Henrik a few weeks previous. She knew that he would be aware of the rumours surrounding herself and Bernie but she wanted to make sure she told him first hand. Not least so that she could reassure the astute Swede that the AAU would be unaffected by their private life. Both being surgeon's with business acumen he seemed to understand and said he would only intervene if he thought that the hospital would be affected.

"Yes. He reminds me of my old Colonel. A formidable man, large shadow; but understanding."

Bernie sat at the table as Serena needed to focus on cooking, she opened a bottle of shiraz. She had discussed it with Serena about asking to speak to Henrik. Being in the position she was in she needed to tell him that she was accepting help with her mental health, not that she was to ready to label it yet; but she needed to ensure that he knew it would not affect her work. She thought about her meeting with Henrik.

She knocked on the door. "Come." Came from inside.

Bernie walked to the desk and offered her hand out to Mr Hanssen's. She shook it firmly "Thank you for agreeing to meet with me."

"Of course, Ms Wolfe. How can I help."

"Well um, as you know, as you are probably aware, Serena; Ms Campbell, and I…"

Henrik saved her the embarrassment of explaining further by waving his hand. "I am aware of the situation between yourself and Ms Campbell and I would only have concern if your relationship affected the running of AAU."

Bernie gave a nod wondering if Serena had spoken to Henrik about their relationship. Her suspicion was a resounding yes given that he tipped a knowing nod as if he had cast iron confirmation that the AAU was not affected.

"Well my time in Kiev gave me time to reflect and take stock. I knew, um, I needed to make amends with Ms Campbell and my children. I also have some of my own wounds to deal with Mr Hanssen."

She paused to check he was still with her, "The Army did not just leave me with physical scars." She traced a line with her hand to where the scar from the IED lay, "Some scars lie deeper."

Hanssen nodded, he did not know what Ms Wolfe knew about him or what Ms Campbell had told her but he had an understanding of mental health issues on a first hand front. "Can I ask, does this currently affect your work Ms Wolfe?"

"No, it seems I have always been able to control that. I seem to be affected when there is nothing else to focus on; or stress. I asked to be referred to a counselling service and have an appointment later today. It is, um, a first step and I have the support of Serena. They did say that it may bring out more memories, um etcetera."

"I understand. A emotional can of worms as it were." He spread his hands.

"Maybe, I don't know; it could get better before it gets worse."

Henrik shifted in his chair, moving a pencil a millimetre on his desk, he looked up "Well Ms Wolfe, I know that you are a valuable member of our team and seem to have settled at Holby. Any support that can be afforded to you will be offered; you only have to ask. Should you require time away to… deal with things… I am sure that Ms Campbell will be more than capable of keeping the AAU ship afloat."

Bernie smiled and Henrik matched her smile. "You have made an impression here at Holby, we always take care of the people that need and deserve it."

At that he stood and moved to the door and to usher he out.

"Thank you Mr Hanssen."

The door closed behind her. _Now for phase one._

She was bought out of her daydream by Jason who came bounding in.

"How was your day Jason?" Bernie asked.

Jason sat and proceeded to explain in great detail the adventures he and Alan had been on. Bernie sat with interest as she listened to him talk. Serena came to sit with them and poured the wine. Placing a hand on Bernie's knee under the table.

"How long until we eat Auntie Serena?"

"10-15 minutes. You have time to take your stuff upstairs and get changed."

He stood and went to the doorway up to his room.

"You sure you're OK." Serena asked tenderly.

"Absolutely." Bernie said with one nod. "Wouldn't mind an early night though." Serena gave Bernie a quizzing look, did she mean 'an early night' or ' _an early night?'_

"I don't know why you are looking at me like that!" She swatted jokingly at Serena's shoulder as she took a sip of wine. They both laughed.

Bernie leaned close to Serena and whispered, despite Jason not being in earshot, "You know how I feel about the kind of therapy you have to offer."

Serena felt goose bumps, as she whispered back, "Well I do hope you have made an appointment."

Serena got up to deal with the oven as delays would not be tolerated by her nephew, and at any rate; they had an early night in store.


	19. Chapter 22

With dinner and TV schedule sorted Serena and Bernie cuddled up on the sofa. Jason was watching another quiz show. Serena was always content just to watch Jason and Bernie battle it out to answer the questions. It was fairly one sided as Bernie was quiet tonight. Serena knew today had taken its toll on her emotionally.

They hadn't discussed it and would not until Bernie was ready. She knew it was a big step for Bernie and she just had to be there and be patient. She knew that Bernie's meeting with Henrik must have gone well as she had received, well they had received (but Bernie left the email reading to Serena), an email from Mr Hanssen; the upshot was that it was a gentle reminder that he trusted them to run the AAU and trauma unit as they had been doing for months; should they require assistance at any time his door was always open…. For anything. Relief of two fronts, no issue with their relationship or Bernie and her facing up to her demons. He was a man of layers, which he did not show very often.

Serena looked over and saw that Bernie had fallen asleep on her shoulder. Serena looked over at Jason, "I hope you don't mind I am going to wake Bernie and we are going to have an early night; it's been a busy day."

Jason nodded, "That's fine Auntie Serena, is Bernie Okay? She does not usually fall asleep in front of the TV, that's you." He smiled.

"She is fine Jason, just think her busy week has caught up with her."

Serena turned to Bernie and kissed her hair, "Bern, I'm sorry to wake you but shall we go up, I don't want your back to give you jip tomorrow."

Bernie stirred and looked up, "OK love."

They got up and went upstairs. "You can go back down if it is too early for you." Bernie stated as she grabbed Serena's hand. "I could do with a shower, if that's OK?"

Serena smiled at Bernie, "You don't have to ask to use the shower, but if you want some time alone, that's fine."

Bernie smiled, "I want you around; I might not be Little Miss Chatty tonight though." _Are you ever!_ Thought Serena.

Serena smiled and placed a hand to Bernie's cheek. "I'm here darling. Take as long as you like in the shower, I can potter about."

"Why don't you join me?" Bernie gave her a look, not passion or lust; it was a look that said, 'I need you.'

"I think that will be a first for me, but I have found I like trying firsts with you Major."

They entered the en suite and undressed. Serena entered the shower cubicle and found the right temperature. Bernie stood for a moment admiring Serena, in that shower. She had been feeling sleepy and emotionally exhausted but the sight before her suddenly woke her up and made her feel a little bit more human.

"Will you stop being a perv and get in here please."

"Seen as you said please." She smiled and entered the shower. She grabbed Serena by the waist and drew her close so that they were both under the stream of water. She kissed her deeply, thankfully Serena reciprocated the kiss.

"Someone has woken up a little." Her hands went up into Bernie's wet locks.

"So it seems." Bernie said between kisses. Her hands travelled around Serena's wet, naked body. "Mmmm you are so sexy."

Serena laughed, "Give over you daft woman." She ran her hands over Bernie's arm muscles and down to her stomach muscles, "There is only one sexy woman in this shower."

"Yup and it's you!" Bernie jumped in before Serena could say anything. "Now I need to wash my hair, unless…"

"Unless, I do it for you?" Serena queried.

"Well you do seem to like running your hands through my hair Frauline."

Serena got Bernie's shampoo and worked it into Bernie's hair. Serena had not realised that Bernie used baby shampoo. She laughed. "What's tickled your fancy?" Bernie said as she felt quite aroused by the head massage she was receiving.

"Baby shampoo Major?" She chuckled as she continued to work her fingers in Bernie's hair.

"Um, yeah. I like it. I can change it though…" Now a bit self-conscious about it.

"No, please don't, it's your smell. It has been vexing me why the smell seemed familiar, it's a good few years since I used it on Ellie."

They kissed again a deep kiss. A loving kiss. One for Serena that reaffirmed that she loved Bernie just as she is. She washed the shampoo out and fumbled for Bernie's conditioner. "Where is your conditioner Bern?"

"Conditioner?"

"You don't use conditioner, do you?"

"Nope, all down to the baby shampoo." She laughed as Serena reached down for the shower gel. "So what's the verdict on the shower gel?"

"Um, this I love, just like you." She massaged it over Bernie in the most sensual way, both could feel the sexual tension building. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes, thank you Serena. I feel much better." As Serena washed the shower gel away she planted kisses upon Bernie's body. At this point Bernie has her back against the cool tiles as they water continues to flow over them. "Mmmm, yes I feel better. You have magical powers Ms Campbell." Serena stands up from where she was kissing Bernie's stomach. "I didn't say stop." Bernie grabs Serena's arse and pulls her close, she pushes her leg between Serena's to get contact to her core. "I have no intention of stopping Major." She feels the contact on her core and knows they are both aroused. "I need you Bernie." They kiss as Bernie's hand goes between Serena's legs, she moves her fingers around Serena's clit. Serena throws her head back into the shower stream. "Stop distracting me, you; I was in the middle of something!" She kisses down Bernie's body until she is back where she was. Bernie's back on the wall and her hands Serena's hair secretly hoping that the kisses work lower.

The kisses did work lower and Serena pushed Bernie's legs apart, to gain access. She ran her tongue through Bernie's core as Bernie rolled her hips into Serena's mouth and pushed Serena's head into her. "Fucking hell Serena." Her legs were threatening to give way as Serena entered her fingers into Bernie's opening, pumping up and down as she sucked on Bernie's clit, knowing release was close. Serena felt Bernie's legs buckle slightly as she came hard, her cum flowing over Serena's face. Serena got up quickly to take Bernie's weight, Bernie was breathing heavily.

"You OK?" Serena asked tentatively.

"Are you joking? Fuck me."

"I think you will find I just did." She smiled. "Now come on Ms Wolfe, the bed is definitely calling." She switched off the shower and they exited in towels.

Bernie walked through to the bedroom and did now look tired. "Let me dry your hair darling." Serena patted to the chair in front of the dressing table. Bernie did as she was told. Serena started to dry her hair and planted kisses to her neck and shoulders as she moved her hair. If Bernie was going to talk tonight, now was the time to mention it. She switched off the dryer as she moved some more hair and whispered in Bernie's ear. "Darling are you sure you are OK after today. I know it was a lot for you."

Bernie turned in her seat and touched Serena's face. "Yes, it was a lot but it was a good step. I don't feel stupid for having the, um, nightmares and stuff. We had a group thing, I am not the only one who functions well but struggles sometimes."

Serena nodded and placed her hand on Bernie's, "I had a one to one session too. Yeah, that was, I don't know yet, it is going to be difficult to make it go away; it's how I handle it that they want to work on. Does that make sense?"

"It does yes. If it helps I will support you how I can. Whether you want to talk about it or not. Whatever you need darling." She placed a kiss to Bernie's lips. "Let me finish drying your hair and then we can rest." She turned the dryer back on and finished Bernie's hair and then concentrated on her own. As Serena teased her own hair ensuring it was dry, Bernie put on her pyjamas and moved over to the bed to get comfortable.

Serena got herself changed as she was about to speak to Bernie but could see she was snoring loudly in the bed. _Crikey, Bernie didn't snore, she must be catching up on years of sleep._

She got into bed next to Bernie, maintaining enough contact for Bernie to know she was there, but not enough to disturb her.

She fell asleep content, knowing that Bernie, her Bernie, was content and sleeping soundly.


	20. Chapter 23

Bernie awoke feeling refreshed. She had a deep and uninterrupted sleep and her darling Serena was there, fast asleep. Bernie wondered what had woken her and realised it was Serena's mobile vibrating. She looked at the clock and it was gone 10am. As they both had today off, a rarity; they did not set the alarm- this was late for both of them.

Bernie leaned over to look at who was calling, by doing this she leaned her front into Serena's back. She lifted the phone, it was Elinor. She kissed the back of Serena's neck and whispered in her ear, "Serena, Elinor is calling." Serena stirred and moaned grabbing the phone.

"Hello darling," She said sleepily.

"You took a while to answer." Elinor observed.

"Mmmm, yes, I was asleep."

All this time Bernie was cuddling up to Serena and placing kisses to her neck and shoulders, running her hands under Serena's pyjama top, suddenly running her hand over a sensitive part of Serena's midriff, Serena let out a high pitched squeak.

"God Mother please tell me I haven't called you while you are fooling around with Bernie, aurgh!"

"No, no, Ellie." She laughed and swatted Bernie's hand jokingly, and put a finger to her lips.

Bernie Sniggered as Serena continued, "What is it you wanted darling?"

"Who said I wanted something Mum?"

"Come on, I know you."

"I was wondering if I could come for dinner today, just wanted to see you."

"And raid my cupboards and freezer no doubt."

"Well, I can't make promises."

"You know you are welcome here always." At this point she turns over to face Bernie, "But Bernie will be here too, just so you know." She smiles at Bernie and Bernie returns the smile.

"I gathered as much Mum, I promise I will play nice; just keep the pashing and PDA's to a minimum."

"Elinor, I do not even know what that means." She laughed, "I will do a full dinner for about 5pm, OK?"

"Yeah, sounds great. Can I stop over too, Libs is being a bit of a ' ' at the moment."

"Of course. See you later darling." She hung up as Bernie had wrapped her hands around Serena and was kissing her collarbone. "Are you trying to distract me Major?"

"Possibly" She smiles.

"So Elinor is coming over later, and she wants to stay too."

"And she is OK with me being here?" Bernie asked tentatively, pausing her kisses to address the Elinor situation.

"Well she knows yes, and she knows; well suspects, you were distracting me while we were on the phone. She thinks we were 'fooling around.'"

They both laugh.

"Look, it will be fine, she knows Sunday Dinner will be all of us; me, you, Jason and Ellie."

"Erm, um, she wants to stop tonight you said?"

"Yes apparently Libby is doing her head in, the woman does have that effect."

"If you like I can go back to mine tonight." Bernie made a point of not saying home, as Serena's was more home that her flat was.

"Well what were you going to do?"

"I had not thought that far ahead if I am honest. If I do stay here tonight I did think about nipping back to the flat just to check on it and get a few bits."

Serena leans in to kiss Bernie as she can clearly see she is a bit ahrehensive and truth be told she was also a bit nervous as Ellie had not yet fully given her seal of approval other than agreeing to give Bernie a chance.

"Bernie, please don't worry about Ellie. She has asked to come around and knows we are still in a relationship; this is her reaching out. I see this as her coming around. Wanting to see if you do truly make me happy. As for you staying tonight, well she knows we are consulting adults in a relationship so your being here is something she will have to accept if she wants to stay over."

Bernie nodded.

"Put it this way, when Edward first bought the embryo home Ellie was incensed. She was livid that Libby was more likely to be confused for her sister than her step mum. She called Edward everything under the sun; nothing he didn't deserve if I am honest. Now though, they are best friends; they have mutual friends from college or something for god's sake. They share clothes and go on nights out, sometimes I think they have a better relationship than Libby and Edward do."

Bernie laughed, "I will try my very best to get on with Elinor but you need not worry about us sharing clothes and nights out."

Serena mock slaps Bernie again. "Will you stop beating me up woman?" She laughs as she brings Serena in for a hug. "Like you say, it will be fine."

Serena looked at the time, "As much as I would love to stay here 'fooling around' with you, I think we need to get up and go shopping. Maybe we could nip to the flat on the way back."

Bernie smiled in agreement. "Five more minutes though, please." She kissed Serena before she could argue.


	21. Chapter 24

They spent more than 5 minutes in bed, that was for certain, but it was not wasted. Bernie rationalised their further 'lie in' by explaining to Serena that they would have to reign it in when Elinor was here. _What was it, no pashing or PDA's._ Bernie could only assume that meant no feeling Serena up or snogging her, to put it bluntly. She needed to get her fill now then.

Eventually they were up and dressed, they went to Marks and Spencer to pick up food. Bernie, who usually hated the mundane task of food shopping, actually did not mind pushing the trolley behind Serena as she picked things from the aisles. She even took pleasure in spending more than a little time picking out some nice wines.

After that they headed to Bernie's flat to just check on things, pick up some post and some more clothes. Serena was still working on Bernie letting her put some of her clothes in with her washing, but it seems that the slowly, slowly catchy monkey approach was the right one to take regarding domestic bliss. She had to keep reminding herself that this was not something that came naturally to Bernie.

They got back to the house mid-afternoon and Serena hit the kitchen straight away as the beef joint needed to be in the oven. Bernie asked if there was anything she could help with but Serena declined. She loved standing in the kitchen with the radio on chopping up the veg and she knew that this did not appeal to Bernie in the same way, but bless her for asking. Bernie was happy to keep Serena company in the kitchen; she sat at the table checking her personal emails and dealing with the few bits of post from the flat. They talked about nothing in particular and sung along to the radio. It was all very relaxed; but inside each were wondering what would happen this evening. Serena just hoped Elinor did not kick off again. Bernie hoped that Elinor would at least see she made Serena happy and that this was not a flash in the pan.

Serena could see that Bernie was looking pensive so she went over to where she was sitting and perched on her knee putting her arms around Bernie's neck.

"Are we OK Major?"

"Mmmm, yeah; just hope it goes OK later, for your sake."

"I know." Serena places a kiss to Bernie's temple, "Dinner is going to be a while; you look like you could do with a run." Serena raised an eyebrow, hoping the prompt would be enough for Bernie to know that she did not mind if she needed some of her own space for a bit.

"You wouldn't mind?"

Serena shakes her head, "Not at all, you run, I bake. What would you like me to make?"

"Um, I don't know, everything you make is exquisite. Surprise me."

Serena smiled and got up, "Off you go then give me some peace while I work."

Bernie smiles as she goes up to change into her running gear, as she comes down the stairs Serena waves some money at her, "Not sure where you are running to but can you get a tin of ambrosia custard for Jason please. Apparently my custard is not up to scratch."

Bernie took the cash and smiled, Serena's custard was so nice she had eaten bowls of it even when the cake had ran out, but Jason…. _He really is a unique young man._

She dropped a kiss to Serena's lips and smiled, "See you in a bit love."

Bernie got back from her run about an hour later. She let herself in as Serena had just put a shortcrust lid on a pie. She was wiping the work surface as Bernie came in and wrapped her arms around her placing the can of custard on the counter.

"Good run?" Serena enquired.

She kissed Serena's neck and spun her round to face her, catching her in a full kiss. "Yes, super. I'm ravenous!"

"Well dinner will be at 5pm, so not long."

Bernie gave her a cheeky smile and ran her fingers over Serena's ticklish waist, "I didn't mean for the food." She lifted her eyebrows pulling Serena in for a kiss. Serena could not believe how wanted Bernie made her feel.

"Well Major, you know you will have to wait for that. In the meantime you better prise yourself from me and go and have a shower before Ellie gets here and thinks we 'fooling around' in the kitchen."

"Too late Mother." Comes an amused voice from the doorway. Elinor is standing leaning against the door frame with a bottle of wine in her hands. Serena does not know how long she has been there but probably too long, "God, you two are just like teenagers."

Both Serena and Bernie turned to look at Elinor, she is beaming. Bernie then turns to Serena and wipes the flour from her cheek and places a kiss there. "I'll be off for a shower. Can I fix either of you a drink before I go?"

Serena signals to the glass next to the hob and Elinor holds out her gift of wine to Bernie. Bernie pours drinks for both from the already open bottle. "I will join you for a glass shortly." She exits the kitchen to freshen up, glad to give Serena some time with Elinor, at the very least to gauge her mood after catching them getting frisky by the fridge.

Serena takes a sip from her glass as Elinor moves herself from the doorframe. "Sorry darling, we didn't hear you come in."

"Clearly Mother." She laughs as she hugs her mum.

"Um, how much did you see? I mean, how long have you been here."

"Oh, long enough Mum. It was like a car accident; you don't want to look, but you just have to." She laughs.

"Ellie!" Serena laughs, "You are just jealous."

"Of what exactly?"

"The fact I am getting more sex than you are." Serena takes another smug sip of wine.

"Good grief, do you have to." Elinor turns as red as the wine she is drinking. "I hope you don't act like that around Jason, poor lad will be scarred for life."

"Jason does not sneak into the house and lean on doorways young lady."

"Touché mother, touché. I don't usually sneak about like that but I just had to see, I mean, what I'm saying is I wanted to see how you two are without putting on a show for me. I wanted to see if she genuinely you know…"

"What?"

"Well everyone always tells people their relationships are brilliant even if they aren't. I needed to see for myself."

"And?"

"Pains me to say it mum but I think you may need to check Bernie for a concussion or something. She wants to ravish you, even when you are wearing that apron and have flour on your face. It's either a concussion or she is actually in love with you."

Now it was Serena's turn to blush the colour of Shiraz.


	22. Chapter 25

Elinor always enjoyed watching her mother put together a meal. She was an excellent cook and everything was always timed to perfection. If she said dinner would be at 5pm, it would be on the table at 5pm. _Good job she has always been like that especially now she has Jason the walking clock living with her._

Jason came into the kitchen to lay the table as if on cue. Ellie offered to help but was dismissed by Jason as she would not lay it correctly in his mind. She wandered into the living room as Jason busied himself and mum never needed any help as you just got under her feet.

Elinor wandered into the living room with her wine knowing there was at least 15 minutes before they would sit to eat. She had not realised that Bernie had come down and was settled in the living room. She was sitting back in the chair with a glass of wine that Serena must have bought into her. "I don't know about you Ellie but I find it best to stay out of the way until the call comes to sit to eat."

Ellie smiled, she was not sure if it was reassuring or disconcerting that Bernie was so settled in her Mum's house and life. "You seem happy to let my mum wait on you."

 _Oh shit, she wasn't going to make it easy was she?_ Bernie smiled a genuine smile, "Quite the contrary actually. I offer to help but I just get under her feet, and as for Jason; I've never quite mastered his way of laying the table. I am on pot washing duties, participating in endless quiz shows and losing at chess to Jason."

Elinor seemed to thaw a little at this, "You wash, I'll wipe then."

"You're on." Bernie confirmed with a wink.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, silence that Bernie could easily manage. Not so easy for a Campbell woman though. "You are a quiet one aren't you?"

Bernie looked up from the paper she was reading as if to confirm this was the case.

"Must drive my mum mad. Bet she sits trying to figure you out."

Bernie took a sip of wine, and left a pause "Is that what you are trying to do?"

This time it was Elinor's turn to give a look of confirmation.

"There is nothing to figure out Ellie, I promise. I know I did wrong by your Mum when I buggered off to Kiev, but I came back. For Serena. I get why you are mad at me for that. Hopefully you will see that I want nothing for the best for your Mum and Jason."

Jason popped his head around the door, "Dinner's ready."

As he disappeared Ellie and Bernie both stood, as they walked to the dining table Ellie quietly said, so that only Bernie could hear, "I'm sure you understand why I can't just take your word for it."

"I don't expect you to Elinor."


	23. Chapter 26

They sat around the table, Serena at the head of the table nearest to the kitchen area, Jason and Ellie both sides and Bernie facing her. Usually Bernie would have sat where Ellie was, closest to Serena, but she was willing to relinquish this post; as although further away she had direct eye contact with Serena and they had, being surgeons, learned to communicate with their eyes only across a table. Today it worked an advantage given that Ellie was still the unpredictable force in the room.

Before Bernie sat she ensured that all glasses were filled and that there was enough wine to hand for the rest of the meal. This was something she always did. Serena cooked, Bernie tended to the drinks, but she ensured that Elinor saw that she did have her uses, had her place; even if it was to ensure that everyone was suitably drunk.

Serena had carved the meat onto plates but the rest of the dinner was in serving dishes so that people could help themselves. This was something Ellie was used to. It was something that Jason had become used to and liked a lot as it meant that you did not have to eat things put on your plate, you could choose. As for Bernie this was a practice reserved for special occasions like a Christmas dinner or such like. It was nice but it doubled the dishes. She was quite happy to eat what was in front of her, army mentality probably.

The first few minutes of dinner were occupied with the passing of dishes and the filling of plates. Bernie ensured that everyone had what they wanted before she took herself. Serena did ensure that Bernie did get the last Yorkshire pudding though; something she was quite happy to pass over.

As they ate there was the need for silence to be broken. Jason, not picking up on the situation, was able to provide, without realising it. "Auntie Serena, I am so pleased we can have dinner with Elinor and Major Bernie."

Serena smiled, "Me too Jason, me too."

Ellie looked a little perplexed, "Um what's with 'the Major', have I walked into some subservient twilight zone here. You have both called her 'the Major' in a…. natural manor." She directs a glare at Bernie.

"Elinor, please. You do not always have to go routing for things that are not there, although it may be your journalistic nature." Serena said sharply.

"What! You both bow to her and call her Major. If it is that easy I may ask you call me Commandant."

There was an audible silence that again Jason broke, "Well Bernie is, was, a Major in the Army. You are not a Commandant of anything."

At this the 'surgical' looks between Serena and Bernie were bought to the fore as they did all they could to keep straight faces and exchange looks that said more than anyone else could interpret.

Eventually the silence was broken, "So you were in the Army then?"

As they continued to eat Bernie responded, "Yes, twenty plus years."

Serena sat in readiness to jump into the conversation should the need arise. Bernie did give her a look as if to say, 'I've got this, stop worrying.'

"Wow, so you were proper Army then?"

Bernie took a deep breath and made the effort for Serena if nothing else. "By 'Proper Army' I assume you mean front line?"

Elinor nodded slightly sheepishly.

Serena looked on as if to acknowledge that maybe her daughter needed to be knocked down a peg or two when it came to her journalistic curiosity.

"I was a trauma medic in the field." She looked at Serena and the Elinor, "I can elaborate if you wish." Hoping and praying that her bluff would not be called. It wasn't. Thankfully.

"Ok, so, you were… are an Army Major."

"Yes." Bernie confirmed.

"Are you going back?" Ellie put on her best 'Journo' stance, but this question was more for her mother than her.

"No. I was medically discharged. However they did give me an option to go back, an open option that I would not take." Bernie looked at Serena to reassure her.

"Medically discharged?" Ellie could not help but pick up on.

"ELLIE!" Serena cut in.

"It's OK darling." Bernie reassured Serena, "I was in a vehicle hit by an IED. An IED being, for want of a better expression, a home-made bomb." She sighed, "The injuries I sustained meant I was repatriated." She laid down her cutlery, "It was quite serious as it goes, and hence I ended up in the hospital closest to my UK address."

Ellie suddenly felt a pang of… something, was it guilt, she wasn't sure.

"Fate bought me back home. It has not been easy and as you know I have faltered." At this point Bernie did something she usually wouldn't. She reached for Elinor's hand and then Jason's. "But now I know where I belong. I only hope I can bring enough comfort to Serena as she offers to me."

Serena smiled as they both accepted the offer from Bernie.

The meal was all but done, as usual Serena had over catered but it meant that Ellie would get food to take back to uni digs and Bernie would at least get bubble and squeak tomorrow.

"There is apple pie but we can have that in a bit if everyone is full."

"Stuffed Mum." Ellie confirmed.

"Let's go through to the living room." Serena stood to indicate it was OK to leave the table.

"Can I top off anyone's drinks?" Bernie asked knowing that both Serena and Ellie would not say no to another. Bernie hung back to sort drinks, this would also indicate where she would sit. Ellie had the choice of the sofa, next to Serena; or the armchair opposite Jason. Bernie did not want to assume that she would be sitting next to Serena.

Bernie walked in with drinks after clearing the table, ensuring that Ellie was aware that she did not expect Serena to do everything for her. Thankfully Ellie had curled up on the armchair leaving the sofa space for Bernie.

By the time Bernie came in they were all watching Countryfile. Bernie was not a big television watcher but since being at Serena's certain shows had popped up on her radar; this being one she actually liked.

By the time the Antiques Roadshow came on Bernie asked if anyone needed more drinks, predictably glasses were held out by Serena and Ellie. Bernie bought their drinks in and kissed Serena on the cheek, "I'll go and wash the pots darling."

"Are you sure?" Serena pouted a little.

"God yes. You know I am rubbish at the Antiques Roadshow game. This is one where you and Jason can actually compete."

They both laughed.

"What is the 'Antiques Roadshow game'?" Ellie enquired.

"Well Ellie, when someone brings something on we try to guess the value, whoever gets closest to the estimate on TV gets a point; but Bernie is not really very good at it so this is when she goes and does the dishes for Auntie Serena."

Serena laughed and Bernie breathed relief as this was more evidence that she did not sit on her arse expecting Serena to do everything.

Bernie goes to the kitchen and pours herself a wine as she sets her phone to music and starts to stack the dishes to wash.

She is arm deep in the washing up bowl as the door opens and Ellie appears. "Turns out I'm crap at the 'Antiques Roadshow game' too. Plus I need make good on my promise right."

Bernie smiled at her.

She picked up the towel and started to dry, again silence was not really a friend to Ellie. "Didn't have you down as a Rufus Wainwright fan."

 _Oh Jesus, she is starting a conversation._ "I have eclectic tastes. Not many people know who this is."

Ellie smiled back. She was starting to see that Bernie did not say a lot but she put thought into what she said. Maybe silence wasn't too bad. She could certainly see her Mum was more chilled around Bernie.

"If you want to change the music be my guest." She indicated a soapy hand to her phone.

"No, this is fine. What does my Mum make of your music tastes? She is very much stuck in the 70's."

"HA, she does like the old stuff, but to be fair she is very open to new stuff too." Bernie felt herself relax a little. She was also glad that the dishes duties were now halved.

"Yes, she is 'open to new stuff'" Ellie said cheekily.

Bernie gave her a side look as if to say 'don't push it'.

Bernie had nearly finished the dishes after a second bowl of suds. "Shall we see if Serena and Jason want apple pie?"

"Yes! Mum's apple pie is the best."

"Isn't it just. You go check."

Ellie went into the living room and Serena returned. Bernie beamed. It seems apple pie was on the go. Plus she and Serena got a few minutes alone. Serena shut the door behind her as Jason hated it when music from the kitchen disturbed the TV.

Serena walked over to Bernie, who was finishing cleaning up the kitchen, "Are you OK love?"

"Yes."

"Sure?" Serena tipped her head, "Ellie made sure you spent time together, I hope she did not interrogate you too much."

Bernie shook her head, "No bamboo under the fingernails so far." Bernie laughs heartily. "What are they doing now?"

"Oh, Jason has roped Ellie into watching strongest man."

They both laugh as Serena puts the pie in the oven to warm through and pulls out the ingredients for custard. Bernie helps by opening Jason's custard and slopping it into a bowl for the microwave.

Bernie comes up to Serena and wraps her arms around her in an embrace. "Has Ellie been OK, honestly?" Serena asked a little worried.

Bernie squeezed a little to reassure Serena, "I think it bugs her that I'm not much of a talker. The silence gets to her; I don't do it on purpose as you know. I think she is still getting the measure of me."

Serena looked up, "I bet you really vexed her."

Bernie smiled with a knowing look.

An advert must have come on as Ellie came into the kitchen, "Thought I might risk getting another drink with the possibility of catching you two making out; but wine wins out."

"Funny" Serena replied as she stood still in Bernie's arms. "As I said, jealous." She plants a kiss on Bernie's lips much to the annoyance of Ellie.

"Just hurry up with the pie mother." She chirped as she left for the living room.


	24. Chapter 27

Jason went up at his usual time of 10pm leaving Ellie with Bernie and Serena. By this point they were on their third bottle of wine and the mood had somewhat relaxed as Ellie did not seem as concerned that Serena and Bernie were cuddled on the sofa.

"Are you two working tomorrow?"

"Yes 9am" Serena answered.

Ellie nodded; "Are you always on the same shift?"

"No not always sometimes we cross over but tomorrow is a meetings day." This time Bernie replied, her emphasis on the word 'meetings' showing clear distain.

"Don't you get tired of each other's' company?" Ellie asked genuinely.

Serena went to answer but Bernie squeezed her hand slightly to indicate she wanted to take this one.

"Well no, because work is work, and home is home. When we are at work we are often not actually working together unless in theatre. Plus I would never tire of the company of Serena." She gave a look to Serena and then Ellie.

At that she got up and swept up the dishes from the apple pie, "I'm just gonna sort these."

She left the room for the kitchen.

"Is she always like that Mum?"

"Like what?" Serena was wondering now.

"Well, not one for words is she? It seems when she does open up she wants to close again."

Serena patted the seat vacated by Bernie inviting Ellie to sit next to her. Ellie took the invitation.

"If there were a tax on words, Bernie would get a rebate. But when she does speak, it is thought out. I often think that is why she and Jason get on, because they cut to the chase and speak their mind and do not feel the need for small talk like us." She gave Ellie a little squeeze. "Why do you think Jason is so taken with Bernie, it's because they say what needs to be said but they can play a game of chess or backgammon without a word because no words are needed."

Ellie gave a suspicious look. "Doesn't that wind you up though?"

Serena tipped her head "You would think so. Jason taught me a lot, it isn't always easy with him. Bernie does help though because they do seem to click. Sometimes words do more damage than silence." _But radio silence for two months hurts._

"I have to be honest Mum, I have not given Bernie an easy time. She seems nice enough, but you're my Mum and I just want to make sure she does not take the piss like dad did."

"Ellie!" Serena said with a sigh.

"No Mum, I was not a bitch, but I was a bit of an ice queen. She's OK. Better taste in music than you and to be fair I think she unnerved me more than I did her."

Serena applied a kiss to her daughter's temple. "I like this one darling."

"I know Mum."

Bernie came back in carrying the last dregs of the bottle of wine. She took the seat occupied by Jason. "Here Ellie, finish this off. Mum and I have to be responsible adults tomorrow."

Ellie smiled and took the bottle and poured into her glass.

"So are you definitely stopping over?" Serna asked to Ellie.

"God yeah. I assume my room is vacant, Bernie isn't stopping there." She gave them a cheeky look, again pushing her luck.

"Correct. Jason assumes you are stopping. You know how he likes routine and knowing plans." Serena confirms.

"So how does it work with you two then?"

They both shoot a look to Ellie, "In what way?" Serena asks.

"Well, does Bernie live here or not?"

Bernie took this one, "I, um, well depending on shifts and stuff we plan. As long as Jason knows if I am stopping or not it's fine."

"So working on honesty, why are you keen to stay here?" Serena probes.

Ellie sighs, "Dad and Libs argue constantly, and I don't mean little quibbles either. Problem is they both try to recruit me as force on their side. It's exhausting!"

Serena hugs her, saying nothing. If Edward married someone with a mental age of a child that is what he gets. Just desserts.

"It's hard mum because, I know it took a while, but I accepted Libs. Now I am paying, she is OK, but when it comes to her and dad… nightmare."

Bernie decided this was too much for her, but given the look Serena just gave her, it was too much for her too. Bernie was going to make excuses to go to bed but stayed.

"It is better here, I know what I'm getting. No games. No offence Bernie but if you and Mum argued I would side with her even if we disagreed."

"Understandably. To be fair I would probably agree with you." A nod to the previous flair up.

Ellie smiled.

"Time for bed said Zebedee." Serena declared. Bernie was quite confused as she knew the reference to be from the Magic Roundabout but not sure why Ellie automatically stood and went to actually go to bed.

Bernie stood to follow and looked at Serena, Serena winked. Confirmation enough that she would explain shortly.

After Serena checked they were locked up, a routine now since Jason had moved in, they went upstairs. Ellie went to her room with no smart arse remarks about Serena and Bernie heading to the one room.

 _Either she is tired or accepts this._ Bernie thinks, either way, all is good. Ellie would rather be here; she would be sure to remind Serena of this later should she worry.


	25. Chapter 28

Bernie woke early and decided to leave Serena in bed until the alarm went off. She did not know why she was awake so early but lying in bed would not help, especially because Serena was so peacefully asleep.

She went down and made a coffee and threw on her coat over her pyjamas so she could go out to the garden for a quick ciggie. She sat looking at the big ash tree as the sun came up. Lost in her own thoughts. She suddenly felt a presence next to her.

Ellie sat on the bench, hands buried in the front pocket of her hoodie. "Can I bum a fag off you?"

"Sure." Bernie held out the pack. "Lighter is in the pack."

Ellie sparked up and took a long drag. "Does mum know you smoke?"

Bernie laughed, "Does she know you smoke?"

Bernie took a sip of coffee. "How come you are up so early then? Not like a student to see the sunrise unless it's on the way home from a piss up."

"I dunno, sometimes I like to watch the sun come up and reflect. It's the right time of day for yoga."

"I didn't have you pegged as the zen type Ellie," Bernie smiled genuinely looking Ellie in the eyes.

"We are all full of surprises if you think about it." She turned slightly to look at Bernie fully, "You have bought out a side of my Mother I have not seen before. I just needed to check that you were genuine because you make her genuinely happy. She shines around you. I just needed to ensure you aren't going to fuck her up like my dad did."

Bernie did not know how to respond to it, best be honest she thought. "Look I know I fucked up when I went away and as you know I totally understand why you were pissed off with me. I know Serena has had a series of people let her down and I did not want to be one of them. I did not think I was worthy of someone like your mum, so I ran. Instantly regretted it of course and eventually I had to come back and face up to it. Now I know it is Serena I want and I will do anything to make her, you and Jason happy."

Elinor expelled a cloud of smoke, "Wow, I think that's the most you have ever said."

"That is about as much candour as I can manage Ellie."

Serena woke to the alarm and knew that Bernie must be up. She opened the curtains to see if she was outside knowing that Bernie did like to catch the sunrise if the opportunity presented itself. The sight she was saw melted her heart. Bernie and Ellie were sitting on the bench smoking and talking. She did not know what they were talking about but it wasn't arguing or angst ridden.

She closed the curtains as she went for a shower. Whilst she was in the shower they must have come in because she entered the bedroom to find Bernie with fresh coffee for them both.

"Hello you." Serena said with a smile.

"Hello yourself." Bernie replied as she could not help but eye up Serena in nothing but a towel.

"Did you enjoy the fresh air and sunrise?" Serena smiled making emphasis on the word 'fresh' knowing that the air was anything but.

"I did. So did Ellie it seems."

"Wow, really." Serena was surprised.

"Yeah. Seems as long as I have cigs she can steal I have an in." She laughs. She pulls Serena in for a hug. "Honestly she only wants to make sure I treat you better than Edward did."

"That won't be too hard." Serena mused as she pulled away from Bernie to get some clothes, "Now go get your shower darling, we have meeting to be on time for."

Bernie smiled and kissed Serena's forehead as she darted to the shower. Serena got ready and headed downstairs to find Ellie curled up on the sofa watching some inane programme on TV. "Hey Mum."

"Morning darling, what are your plans for today?"

"No uni today, can I kick around here for a bit." She looked up pleadingly from her mug.

"As long as you like sweetheart, this is always home for you should you want to be here."

"Thanks Mum."

"Breakfast? I'm making porridge."

"Yeah, I mean if it's no trouble."

"Not at all."

Serena made porridge and the four of them sat at the table. It was nice. Serena felt this was what she wanted. The three most important people to her sitting here sharing breakfast.

"Jason are you working today?" Ellie enquired.

"Yes Ellie, I am going in with Auntie Serena and Bernie even though I don't start until later."

"Well Jase if you want you can hang around here with me a bit, we can watch some TV and stuff and I can drop you off later. I can pick you up when you finish if you want."

Serena looked on, Ellie did have her selfish streak from her dad but ultimately she did have a good heart and she should see that Ellie was trying with Jason.

"Well, that does seem like a good offer Ellie, does that mean you are stopping tonight too?"

"Yeah, no uni until tomorrow so thought I might doss here until then, if that's ok with you guys."

Serena squeezed her daughters hand to confirm that it was absolutely fine. Plus it might put Liberty's knickers in a twist knowing that Ellie would rather stay at Serena's with Jason and Bernie. Serena was aware that both Edward and Liberty were aware of her relationship with Bernie and whatever their opinion she quite frankly did not give a shit. At this point her family was content. She hoped that Cameron and Charlotte became part of the fold soon as that would complete the set. So far luck had been on their side, she just willed it to continue so that Bernie could make peace with the kids and soon enough hopefully they would accept Serena and her brood too.


	26. Chapter 29

It was a long day on AAU. With morning meetings and an afternoon of patients from A and E. Plus the red phone, both Bernie and Serena would be glad when they could call it a day.

Serena had the foresight to call Ellie and ask if she were picking Jason up would she mind sorting supper as it transpired that he would be finishing before them, as a trauma case was coming in. Ellie had asked what they wanted her to cook. Serena just asked her to sort herself and Jason out, she would see to herself and Bernie, especially as she did not know when they would be back.

By the time they got in Jason had retired to his room, very much sticking to his routine. He would still be awake and know they were in, but would not feel the need to stay up. Ellie was up, just about. She was on the sofa with her laptop across her, dosing slightly. Music in the background.

Serena and Bernie had picked up Chinese and a bottle of wine. Bernie was in charge of plating up as Serena went through to the living room. She planted a kiss to Ellie's forehead, "I'm sorry we are so late darling."

Ellie was immediately responsive as she was only half asleep. "It's OK mum, I understand, Jase said something about a multi car accident."

"Yeah, nasty business. Did you and Jason eat OK?" Serena omitted to mention that Bernie lost a girl, no older than Ellie during an operation, an operation that she was unlikely to survive. That did not make it any easier.

"Yeah, not sure he was as impressed with my cooking as my repertoire is not as wide as yours. We settled on omelette and chips with salad."

Serena smiled warmly, "That's my girl, thank you."

Bernie carried in 2 trays with plates of Chinese food on, "Hi Ellie, sorry I should have checked, do you want anything?"

"Oh, no it's fine, Cuz and I ate earlier. Won't say no to a prawn cracker though."

"Cuz?" Serena queried.

"Yeah, seems Jase doesn't mind me calling him 'Cuz'. Who knew?"

"You do like pushing your luck with him don't you." Serena observed.

Bernie looked up from her food, Ellie knew whatever it was Bernie must feel it profound to comment, she just was not sure if it would be in her favour or not. "I think…" Bernie mused, "Elinor is testing Jason, to see his limits." She paused. "No bad thing in my book. If he did not respond well she would step back." Bernie gave Elinor a look as if to take up the reigns.

"God yeah, if he freaked Mum I would not push it."

Serena looked between them both.

"Put it this way, look how far he has come since meeting you. We are all learning." Bernie indicated between herself, Serena and Ellie.

At this moment Serena could not wish more than she had right now. A wonderful Daughter and Nephew as well as Bernie. More than she could imagine. They sat in contentment eating as Ellie attacked the prawn crackers, dipping them into the sauce on Serena's plate.

"So what is this music anyway Ellie, it's a bit depressing?"

Bernie and Ellie looked and laughed. "Radiohead" they said in Unison. The sat and finished their food listening to Radiohead. _Christ this is melancholy._ Serena was not particularly a fan.

Serena yawned as she collected up the plates.

"I'm going up now, night." Ellie got up off the sofa and went upstairs.

Serena came back to the living room and sat on Bernie's lap. Bernie welcomed the move as she placed her arm around Serena's waist and bought her in. "You OK?" Bernie asked.

"I was going to ask you the same thing." Serena pressed a kiss to Bernie's lips.

"Yeah, you know; it never gets easier telling parents that they have lost their child and then having to ask if they are on the donor list. It's different with the Army, I'm not saying easier…. Because that is not true. Patching up kids Ellie's age on the side of the road…. Yes, they joined the Army by choice, but you have to ask if they knew about the harsh realities."

They heard a noise, Ellie was sneaking in not wishing to disturb what was obviously a serious conversation; not that she was eavesdropping. "Sorry, laptop." Ellie apologised.

Bernie smiled. "It's OK Ellie. Goodnight."

"Night darling." Serena did not move from Bernie's lap.

Ellie nodded as she left.

They sat silently holding each other for a while. Serena did not want to approach the subject again. If Bernie wanted to talk, she would in her own time. Serena would never push, that would only cause Bernie to close up.

Bernie drained her glass. "Shall we go up love?"

Serena kissed Bernie tenderly to confirm as she stood and took both glasses to the kitchen. As she walked she looked back into the living room. Bernie looked tired, really tired. She wondered whether Bernie had known the harsh realities of the Army when she joined, had she been talking about herself a little just now.


	27. Chapter 30

Serena was in the en suite as she allowed Bernie to rest, they had both woken early that morning and basked in each other's company. Conscious of Ellie occupying the room next door and the walls being relatively thin they had done nothing more than 'fool around' as Ellie termed it. They had a lot of fun and if Ellie heard anything it was probably her mother laughing as Bernie kept on discovering more of Serena's ticklish spots.

They had found out that Serena took far longer than Bernie to get ready for work, and Bernie had discovered she liked spending time in bed now; well more specifically, Serena's bed.

There was a tap at the door, Serena knew it to be Ellie's knock. "Come in." She called from the bathroom.

Ellie opened the door, "Hi Mum, didn't want to interrupt anything; I just wanted to say I think I am going to drive back down to uni in a bit. Was going to go back to dad's but I have everything here and I kinda need to get back and study."

"When are you leaving darling?"

"Oh probably after a brew. Do you want one? I want to make sure I say goodbye to Bernie before I go too. Do you think she will be awake or have you worn her out?"

Bernie was lying on her front in the bed, head to one side on the pillows and hair all over the place. "I'm just resting my eyes, coffee; milk no sugar please." Came the muffled response from the pillows.

Serena burst out laughing. Ellie went a little red, "Oh Jason has already gone off with Alan. Transport museum; deep joy. Said he will be back for tea. I'll go and brew up for you and sleeping beauty there." A little cheek in her last sentence as she took her leave.

As the door closed Serena approached and leaned in to kiss Bernie, "So do I have to kiss you to get you to wake up, 'sleeping beauty'?"

"Absolutely." Came the muffled response from the unmoving Bernie.

Serena planted a kiss to Bernie's lips and sure enough she seemed to come alive as she deepened the kiss. Pulling Serena to the bed she wrapped her arm around her waist.

"Oi, you need to get up, not drag me back to bed; however tempting it is." She got up and sat at the dressing table to fix her makeup and hair.

Bernie let out, what could only be described as, a growl. "Spoil sport."

"Yes, that's me; now get your arse in that shower."

As she padded across the bedroom in a mock grump she leaned to Serena and kissed and sucked at Serena's collarbone as Serena was applying her mascara. "I'm going to look like Alice Cooper if you keep distracting me."

Bernie continued her attack, "Last thing I wanted is to mess up your makeup," bringing back her attention to the love bite she was working on.

"But you don't mind giving me a hickie?"

Bernie straightened up and smiled. "Nope."

As she strolled off to the bathroom Serena swatted at her as she often did when Bernie was being Bernie. "I'll be downstairs darling. I need to regulate what provisions Ellie takes from the kitchen so I can ensure to replace it before Jason gets back." Bernie, now naked ready to enter the shower, turns and gives her a wink."

Serena holds her stare for a moment cataloguing the image for the future. She shakes her head as if to return to reality. "You are a wicked woman Major." She leaves swiftly before she is drawn to the shower.

Serena enters the kitchen to find the coffee's lined up; she quickly took Bernie's up and left it on the dresser. Smiling as she could hear Bernie singing in the shower, as she obviously thought no one would hear. She did not know the song but it sounded happy. Unlike that melancholy garbage from last night.

She sat at the kitchen table with her coffee as Ellie came in, on the phone to one of her housemates; she was in a flap about something. "Oh god, I don't know do I? I'm back today but the landlord has not answered by emails or calls." There was silence from Ellie as the person the other end said something, "Anyway, not sure why it's my responsibility all the time… can't you or Kristen sort it out?"

Serena gave Ellie a concerned look. Ellie returned a roll of the eyes and pointed to the handset. "Look, I'll try again, leave it with me and I will call you back. Anyway I will be back in about an hour so chill for fuck's sake."

She threw her phone to the table, sat and sighed.

Serena looked at her as if to say, 'tell mother'.

"Honestly Mum, I live with children, they can't do anything for themselves." She threw her hands in the air. "There is a problem with the plumbing or something. Something watery anyway. Gab's can't have a shower and she's expecting me to sort it out."

Serena looked at her, "How long have you had 'watery' problems?"

"Well, it started Thursday or something. No pressure in the water flow, and as for showers, weaker than a baby's piss. So I called the landlord; answerphone. Sent an email; nothing. Gab's and Kris' expect me to sort it because I found us the house and, um, well out of the three of us, I'm the most responsible. I say responsible, I mean the least stoned."

Serena looked a little horrified. _So she lives with potheads and she said least stoned implying she smokes cannabis. No wonder she had never been invited to Elinor's student house._ Before her thoughts were allowed to manifest themselves further another voice entered into the ether. Bernie was holding her mug and leaning on the counter, "Water pressure? Is that it?"

Elinor turned to face Bernie, "Yeah I think so, it's all still the right temp, just weak."

"Where do you live?" Bernie enquired, "I could have a look?"

Elinor looked surprised, "My digs are about an hour away Bernie, I couldn't ask you to…"

"Why not. I'm no plumber but I think I have an idea of what your problem may be. I wouldn't charge a call out fee either."

Serena looked across at Bernie, she had not prompted Bernie to make the offer, and she did not expect it. She knew that Bernie knew a bit about DIY and fixing things. This was Bernie making an effort.

"Are you sure?" Elinor asked, as surprised as her mum. "Don't you have to work today?"

Bernie pushed herself off the side and came to stand next to Serena. "I'm on the late today, so I need something to fill the morning. How about I go back to my flat to get a few bits; I doubt you have a spanner right? Then I can drive over to you. Write me down your address."

Elinor looked to her mother, who nodded to confirm that Bernie's offer was genuine. "Pass me your phone, I'll punch it into google maps." She directed to Bernie.

Bernie passed the phone and Ellie typed quickly then passed back. She retrieved her phone from the table and waved it, "I'll just call the moron twins and tell them I've sorted it then I'll get my shit together."

She was walking out of the kitchen, upstairs to get her stuff, "Right, I've sorted it. You can thank me by getting beers in later. I'll be back in about an hour and a half and I'll have someone with me. Don't be dick's cos we are getting a freebee job OK."

Bernie sat in Ellie's vacated seat as Serena reached and stroked her face, "You didn't have to do that."

"I know."

"But, …" Before Serena could get further Bernie pressed her finger to Serena's lips.

"Shhhhh. I can help, let me help."

Serena squeezed her hand and raised from her seat, she retrieved a cool bag from the drawer and opened the freezer throwing some Tupperware filled with various foods into the bag, she then attacked the fridge. Bernie watched thinking she had never had to do this with her kids, but then she was never around. If she had been the care package she sent them away with would not be home-made lasagne and pies; but pot noodles, multi packs of crisps and bottles of Bud.

Bernie moved to the hallway as she could hear Ellie still on the phone mauling her bag down the stairs. "Can you tidy the place up a bit, please; just a bit. At least so we can get to the kitchen." Another silence as Ellie listened. "God no, my Mum isn't coming but seriously." Another silence, Bernie reached out to take Ellie's bag and laptop. "Jesus don't tell Matt I'm back yet. He thinks I'm on study leave 'til Wednesday. Not ready for that crap."

Bernie could see Ellie was busy on the phone as she lingered on the stairs and Serena was busy ensuring Ellie had a 'big shop' to take back to her student house. She looked at Ellie and indicated outside to the drive and did a hand sign for the keys in the ignition. "Hang on." She said to the phone.

"You sure" she mouthed to Bernie. Bernie nodded as Ellie threw the keys, which Bernie caught arm stretched as Ellie had not really thrown on target. If she was to go to hers, get her toolbox, drive to Ellie's, fix everything and get back in time for work; they needed to get a move on.

Bernie went out to open Ellie's boot. She put in her bag and laptop and went in to retrieve the bags Serena had packed full of food. "Jesus Serena, how much food." Serena smiled and shrugged. She was packing for stoners it seemed.

"Ellie." She called.

"Yeah" Ellie called, terminating the call and entering the kitchen.

"I've got to go now. Work calls." She held out her arms for a hug, Ellie took the prompt and came in for a big cuddle. Not least because she was getting about £60 worth of food, not crap either, Marks and Sparks and home-made stuff no less. As they hugged she spoke to Ellie knowing Bernie was out at the car putting the bags in the boot. "Don't take the piss with Bernie please, she's doing something nice for you."

"OK Mum, I know, I won't"

"Can you feed her too, otherwise she won't eat before coming to work. You have enough food now."

"You really do look after her don't you?"

"We look after each other. Now I have to go, will you two be ok?"

"Yes Mum, go." Ellie gives her an extra squeeze before releasing.

Serena goes for her bag, coat and shoes as Bernie comes back in. "I have to go darling, text me OK."

"Mmmm will do." She places a chaste kiss to Serena's lips acutely aware that they have an audience.


	28. Chapter 31

Bernie pulled up at the address Ellie had given her but as yet there was no sign of her car. She pulled her phone out to text Serena.

"Hi Darling, I'm at Ellie's now, just waiting for her to arrive. B x"

Bernie was not expecting a text straight away, but that's what she got.

"Thank you for doing this. I know you usually go to the flat after a late but will you come to mine. I want to pay you for your good deeds. Supper and dessert? S x"

Bernie raised her eyebrows, she liked the idea of being remunerated for her efforts.

"What's for supper?"

Again the reply was instant again.

"I will save you some pie and as for dessert…."

Another message came through, this time a picture message. Bernie opened it. It was a selfie shot of Serena lying on her bed in sexy lingerie, with stockings and suspenders on. Her right hand just sneaking into knickers. The shot was from the neck down but Bernie knew that hot body anywhere. She stared at the photo for a few minutes.

"Fucking Hell Serena, can I skip to dessert? Pie can wait. B x"

A simple message came back from Serena, it was an emoji of a winking face. Bernie took a breath out as she tried to compose herself. Suddenly there was a knock at the window. Bernie wound down the window to Ellie's smirking face. Swiftly pocketing her phone.

"How the fuck did you get here before me and manage to get in some sexting to my mother?"

Bernie was lost for words, how long had Ellie been there, had she seen Bernie's phone or was she making a joke because of how the pair of them were around each other, "I, um, I'm a fast driver."

She wound the window up and turned off the ignition and got out of the car. Ellie was now in the boot of her car pulling out her bags. Bernie goes to give her a hand. "You are really rather chivalrous, aren't ya? Far more than any of mum's other conquests."

"It comes naturally to me when it comes to your mum."

"Yeah you are certainly an improvement on the others. But then the bar was not very high to be fair. My mum usually has terrible tastes."

They walked to the door and Ellie opened up, the smell of stale weed and fabreeze hit her like a ton of bricks. They were in a corridor as the front room; or the parlour as her mother would call it; had been made into another bedroom with the corridor running to the side. They entered the living room, this was a typical terrace and was decorated in a rather old fashioned way, it reminded Bernie of her childhood home.

Bernie carried the shopping through to the kitchen and puts it on the side. She shouts through to Ellie "Do you want me to put this stuff away before I look at the taps?"

"Nah, you're OK Bernie, I'll do that."

As Bernie comes back to the living room she spots one of Ellie's house mates lounging on the sofa with a suspicious looking roll up cigarette and a share bag of crisps to her side. Judge Judy was playing on the TV.

"Bernie, this is Kristen. She's studying law."

Bernie turns to look at the TV. "So I see."

"Yeah, revision. You are?" She eyes Bernie suspiciously.

"This is Bernie, she's come to look at the taps for us."

Bernie could sense that Kristen was curious, "I'm just nipping to the car." She made her exit, hopefully things would be more relaxed when she came back.

"Chill, she's mum's friend." Ellie confirmed.

The penny dropped for Kristen, she held her index finger and middle finger to her lips and pushed her tongue through and wiggled it laughing.

"Pack it in Kris." Ellie says laughing as Bernie comes back in.

She follows Ellie through to the galley type kitchen as Ellie starts to put away the provisions in the bag.

Bernie tests the taps, seeing the lack of pressure. She opens the cupboard under the sink to switch off the water so that she can tinker about without getting drenched. As she shuts the water off an angry voice comes from the bathroom as the other house mate enters the kitchen, "Oh. The plumber. Sorry was just going to kick off."

Ellie laughs, "Mum's friend, Bernie. She's looking at it as she is free of charge."

Gabby mouths, "Mum's friend" to Ellie making inverted commas with her fingers.

Gabby laughs, "Good old Mama Campbell, sends food and emergency plumbing services."

Bernie is reaching for her spanner and clanging about under the sink. As the space is pretty tight Ellie and Gabby are both stuck in the kitchen until Bernie has finished. Bernie is kneeling down and leaning in. Her top has ridden up and the students have a view of Bernie's arse crack and the top of her boxers.

Ellie gets out her phone and holds a finger to her lips to hush Gabby's laughter as Ellie takes a picture of the view afforded to them.

"You want a brew Bernie?" Ellie asks stifling a laugh.

"Yes please." Bernie calls from the cupboard.

"No milk mate." Gabby says to Ellie. Ellie picks up a bottle and waves it at Gabby, "Nice one El's, you need to visit your mum more often."

Ellie sticks the kettle on and fires the picture of Bernie to her mum with the caption, "If Trauma surgery does not work out for Bernie, she could become a plumber… or a porn star. You could be her bored housewife." She completed her text with a winking emoji, just like the one Serina had sent to Bernie.

Ellie passed her phone to Gabby silently as she poured the tea. Gabby burst into fits of laughter.

Bernie comes out from the cupboard and runs the taps, running perfectly. "What's funny?" Bernie looked confused and had the feeling they were laughing at her. But why.

"Don't worry Bernie, I just sent mum a message saying that if being a surgeon didn't work out you would make a good plumber."

"…Or porn star." Gabby added.

Bernie's head whipped to Ellie, "What? I just thought mum would like a picture of you too." She added a wink. She handed her phone to Bernie. At least Bernie now knew that Ellie had seen her phone and the messages from Serena.

"Bloody hell Ellie," Bernie said with a sigh, "I need a smoke." She went out to the back yard and leant against the wall. She was getting her cigarettes out as Ellie came out to lean on the wall adjacent to her.

"Sorry Bernie." Ellie said with a genuine air.

Bernie lit a cigarette and offered the pack to Ellie, she took a fag and Bernie lit it. Ellie took this as the apology accepted that Bernie intended it to be.

"Don't worry mum will see the funny side."

"Will she?" Bernie queried.

"I assume you know my mum quite well, yes?" Bernie tipped her head in agreement. "So you know that she is a massive flirt, she has a good sense of humour and she is a very sexual kind of person." Ellie paused hoping she was not going too far, "As you are aware she has a world record of number of decadent and matching underwear sets."

Bernie blew out smoke, "Don't think I've seen the same one twice." She raised her eyebrows.

Ellie continued, "So I'd like to wager that when she sees that message she will come back with a cheeky quip with the intention of embarrassing me."

Bernie considered the bet. She knew Ellie was probably right, knowing her mum so well. She would like to see how Serena played it. She held out her hand to shake on it, "Bottle of red on it?" She offered to Ellie. Ellie accepted her hand and they shook.

"I'll definitely win this one Major. Who do you think taught my mum how to take a picture like that one she sent to you?"

Bernie's eyes widened as she took a long drag and stubbed out the end of the fag in the ashtray on the windowsill.

"Oh hello, message from the mothership." Ellie exclaimed excitedly.

They both looked at Ellie's phone as she opened the message.

"As long as Bernie is between my sheets I would never be a 'bored housewife'" The message topped off with a winking emoji.

Ellie laughed, "Looks like you owe me a bottle of wine."


	29. Chapter 32

Author note: This is most definitely an M rated chapter. I should have my wrists slapped for being so filthy, but quite frankly I do not care. Just ensure you are not reading this at work or in the eye line of ANYONE. We all know what happened to Bernie when she got caught out by Ellie! Enjoy my little Berina-kins.

CH 32

Serena was in theatre when Bernie arrived at the hospital and due to the steady flow of patients and the activity on the red phone they were a little like ships like passed in the night during the few hours their shifts crossed over. In a way both ladies were grateful for the busy pace of the day, not least because it flew by.

Bernie could not wait for the end of her shift. With half an hour to go it had gone quiet so she retreated to the office with a sandwich. She had not eaten since lunch and knew she was going to need to keep her energy levels up for when she got home. She pulled out her phone for a cheeky look at the photo from earlier. Serena must have read her mind as picture message came through. A full frontal shot of Serena's tits with the message, "I'm bored, hurry up and get your treat."

Bernie laughed, so loud in fact that Morven could hear her from the other side of the door.

Bernie typed a response, "I'm ravenous; I will be there ASAP. B x"

She finished her sandwich and decided to do a ward round to fill up the remaining time. She went over to Morven who was taking over from her. "Come on Doctor Digby, let's do a quick lap so I can get off."

Morven smiled, she liked Bernie; no nonsense, level headed, calm in a crisis. She hoped to be the kind of surgeon Ms Wolfe was one day. She also noted that both Ms Wolfe and Ms Campbell seemed far happier now than they had a few months ago. It was no secret by now that they were a couple and she for one was pleased for them. It also gave her hope that love can come along at any time, in any form.

Bernie ensured everything was ticking over nicely before announcing that she was off, pronto. Morven noticed that she virtually ran out of the door.

She got in the car and nearly broke the law getting home to Serena. She pulled up and let herself in taking a deep breath knowing that dessert was waiting in the bedroom.

Serena heard the front door go and swiftly removed her robe and hung it up as she positioned herself; in what she hoped was; a seductive pose.

Bernie burst into the room and took in the sight before her as she pushed the door shut.

"You took your bloody time!" Serena beckoned her to the bed.

Without hesitation Bernie removed her shirt and trousers so that she was in just her underwear, un-matching of course. She leapt onto the bed and took Serena in her arms bringing her in for a deep kiss. This kiss was urgent, desperate and feral. She didn't care, she needed Serena immediately. "Fucking hell Serena, that picture this morning!" She said between kisses. "I nearly had a heart attack in my car." Serena laughed into the kiss. "Ellie saw it, crept up to my car when I was…" They kissed again, this time a little calmer.

"I gathered she'd seen it."

Bernie was running her hands up and down Serena's body taking in the sexy underwear, she literally did not know where to start. "Serena, I'm, um." She sounded a little panicked.

"Calm down Bern, we don't need to rush. I'm all yours. OK?"

"Yes, sorry just, um, Wow!" Serena took advantage of Bernie's stunned state and pushed her on to her back as she straddled her hips.

"You deserve a treat for being so nice to Elinor." She rolled her hips into Bernie and received a groan from her as she leaned in to kiss her neck. She then moved to her ear, "You can do whatever you want with me Major."

She sat up as Bernie reached out to play with the lace on Serena's knickers. "Mmmmm." She leaned up to kiss where her fingers had been. She was taking her time, savouring every second. Bernie's hands went to Serena's arse as she pushed her up a little. She was kissing at Serena's core through the now wet knickers. Serena reached to remove the garment, "No, leave them on." Came the muffled response from Bernie. She was kissing at the top of Serena's thighs. Serena let out a rather loud yelp.

Bernie looked up and put a finger to her lips, "Jason."

Serena panted, "He's at Alan's tonight, decided to stay." She smiled. This gave Bernie a little more free licence as now she did not have to worry about sending Serena into a wailing frenzy. She quite fancied the challenge.

"Well in that case…" She grabbed Serena's thighs and lay back as she guided the kneeling Serena so that her thighs were now straddling her head, "You might need to hold on to something." She guided Serena down a little as pulled her knickers to one side and took a swipe at Serena's folds before forcing her tongue into Serena. She had her hands on the back of Serena's thighs encouraging her to ride her tongue as she pushed in and out.

Serena was holding on to the headboard, it literally was a white knuckle ride. "Bernie, I… wow." She knew she was going to come hard but she did not want it to end. Bernie's hot mouth, her electric tongue inside her. _Fuck it I'm going to scream._ Serena let out an orgasmic cry as she came. Bernie's tongue was now lapping up the copious amounts of cum that Serena had released. A second wave came over Serena as she had the overwhelming urge to sit down, remembering that if she did she may suffocate her lover and that would be a difficult one to explain to the authorities. She literally fell off Bernie and came to rest at her side panting heavily. Bernie lay next to her also catching her breath. Bernie knew she had tears in her eyes and did not feel ashamed to let them roll down her cheeks.

Serena had not seen Bernie's tears but as she looked up at the ceiling she wondered if she were a little selfish when it came to love making with Bernie. Bernie always seemed to give to Serena first and she was happy to receive; but this did make her feel a little selfish, especially tonight; shouldn't it be Bernie having the orgasm of her life.

"Bernie," She all but whispered.

"Yeah." Bernie replied still catching her breath.

"Am I selfish in bed? What I mean is, um, I." She sighed, "I should be the one pleasuring you and well…"

Bernie turned swiftly to face Serena, so that Serena could see her tears. "Darling why ever would you think that. Making love to the woman I love is the greatest pleasure I could wish for." She took Serena's hand and bought it to her face to trace the tears. "Nobody has ever had this effect on me, I can absolutely assure you that you are the most wonderful and generous lover. Never doubt that."

"But."

"No but. You said I could do whatever I wanted with you, and I chose the thing that would give me the most absolute pleasure."

This time Serena was crying, how could Bernie just be so wonderful? Attentive and kind and, generous. "Bernie I just, well, I wanted to make you…"

Bernie gave her a look, "Don't you worry about that darling, I am only one behind you on that score sheet. I was not joking when I said that making love to you gives me the greatest pleasure."

Subconsciously Serena's hand went down between Bernie's legs and she had most certainly also come hard.

Bernie looked a little sheepish as she made a further admission, "Um, that first night I stayed and we didn't go all the way, well, I um. You know."

Serena looked a little shocked but was pleased that Bernie was able to be so honest with her.

"Would you mind if I evened the score out a little?" Before Bernie could answer Serena had pushed her onto her back and was tracing kisses down her body in order to meet up with where her hand was already resting.


	30. Chapter 33

The next day Bernie was very quiet at work. Serena knew not to take it personally. Bernie had some more counselling today and she knew that Bernie was still getting used to opening up and addressing the issues she had. As they had cuddled in bed that morning Bernie had asked Serena if it was OK if she stopped at her flat tonight as she wanted to have some time to herself.

Serena thought that it would be better for Bernie to spend the night at hers, even if she decided to spend it in her own company at the bottom of the garden; but she wasn't going to push her. She knew if she pushed too much Bernie may run, it's what she was conditioned to do, and although she had made it clear to Serena that she was tired of running away, there was not guarantee she would not do it again.

She agreed to follow whatever Bernie wanted on this one, but should she need Serena she would be right there in whatever capacity she needed her.

Bernie was leaving shortly to ensure she made her appointment. Serena went to the office to ensure she saw her before she left. As she came through the door Bernie was just putting on her coat.

"Hello you." She said quietly.

"Hello yourself. Are you OK?" Serena asked with trepidation.

"Me, yes, um just…. Nervous." Bernie admitted.

Serena sat on the corner of Bernie's desk, "Can I ask why?"

Bernie could not quite look at Serena, "Um, difficult one, um, each time I go, they unlock more feelings in me and I, um…."

Serena wanted to help her to finish the sentence but she was not sure what to say so she just sat on the desk looking at Bernie.

"Feelings I buried deep down, well, they are being bought to the surface and, they say it helps; so that I can learn to let them go."

Serena stood and turned Bernie to face her and grabbed her hands, "And you would prefer to keep them buried where they were?" She ventured.

Bernie nodded behind her fringe.

"Bernie I do understand and I am here for you in whatever capacity you need me. Just remember that, just please don't shut me out darling."

Bernie squeezed her hands to confirm she had heard and understood.

"Just please give it a chance darling because you are doing so, so well; and you have to admit that you are sleeping better and are more…. Settled."

"That's because of you Serena. You are my anchor." She mumbled.

"That's as may be sweetheart but there are things I cannot do for you, I wish I could." She planted a kiss to Bernie's forehead. "You better head off. Please call me later if you feel up to it."

"Promise." She gave Serena's hands a squeeze as she left the office not looking back. She felt vulnerable, weak and stupid to be honest. A grown woman needing counselling. She shook her head at the thought trying to remember that it was not stupid.

Bernie got back to the flat and felt exhausted, mentally shattered. She could not decide if she was hungry or not so settled on a beer, given that this was actually the only thing in her fridge. She sat on the sofa. She did want to call Serena but wasn't really in the mood to talk, she kind of wished she was at Serena's because she would be near to her wonderful girlfriend but if she wanted alone time she would be afforded it.

She lit a cigarette as she opened the back door. She would not smoke in the flat, plus she got a certain amount of comfort from leaning on the wall and staring at the tree the other side of the fence.

She felt her phone go off, she knew it would be Serena. She read the message.

"Hello you, hope this afternoon went well. Here if you need me for ANYTHING. Will leave you alone if that is what you need, just wanted to check you are OK. Love you. Sx"

Bernie read the message, she could not recall if Serena had said she loved her in a text message before but it was nice to see it in black and white. Someone who knew her well and was not obliged, loved her; Bernie the fuck up.

She needed to reply. Ideally she at least owed Serena a phone call, but she did not really have a lot to say.

She took a drag of the cigarette as she typed a message, deleted bits, retyped, deleted more and finally decided on, "Hello yourself, I'm OK. Promise. Are you free for a phone call? Not feeling overly chatty but it would be nice for you to talk to me."

Serena looked at the message from Bernie. She was not sure how to read into it. She had made the effort to reply with their little in joke of 'Hello you/ hello yourself' which she saw as positive. She wanted a phone call but didn't want to talk much herself. _Well Bernie is hardly a chatty Cathy anyway so not going to overthink that_ Serena rationalised. Should she ask if Bernie wanted to come here? Should she offer to go there? She decided to play it by ear. Let Bernie bring such things up. She fired a quick message.

"I'm free to talk anytime darling."

Bernie was pleased that Serena had agreed to the call even if it meant that Serena babbled on as Bernie listened. She shut the back door, got another beer and sat on the sofa and dialled Serena's number.

"Hello beautiful," Bernie said as the phone was answered. If there was such a thing as hearing a smile she was sure she could hear Serena's. Her heart lifted. She knew then it was worth the effort not to run or lock Serena out of her life.

"You must have the wrong number." Serena replied.

Bernie could not help it, she laughed. This pleased Serena as she knew that it would be inappropriate to ask Bernie how she was; knowing exactly how she was. So laughter was the route she chose.

"Definitely not. I called Serena Campbell, the sexiest woman on the planet. Do you know her?"

Serena chuckled as her cheeks flushed.

"I do indeed, she would like to know if her wonderful girlfriend is OK." Serena usually hated when people referred to themselves in the third person. Edward had done it on more than one occasion; dickhead. Robbie had done it during sex; dickhead. She figured if this worked and got Bernie to talk then she would let the matter slide.

"I'm exhausted to be honest. OK but tired. Tell me about your day."

 _Ah, diversion technique_ Serena thought, "As long as you are fine, have you eaten?" She wasn't going to give up so easily.

"Yes," Lied Bernie "Now can you tell me about your day please, I'd like to hear."

Serena smiled, she had obviously hit the wall, best not to push it. "Well after you left the place turned into a madhouse to be frank. Nothing serious patient wise, more the staff rather. One would think it were a full moon tonight or something." Serena paused not wanting to waffle, "It seems we are no longer the main fuel of the rumour mill either, not that I am one for gossip but it seems that focus has shifted to Keller; it's a hotbed of activity up there based on what I know; which isn't a lot. Was it like that when you were on Keller?"

Bernie laughed, "If you recall my first stint at the fore of the rumour factory was during my time on Keller."

"God, sorry Bern." Serena scolded herself, she automatically forgot about anything before Bernie tipped up on AAU.

"S'OK, was good practice for our run." She stated rather matter of factly. "So what else is going on at Holby towers?" She wandered to the fridge and silently opened another beer as she spoke.

"Mr Mayfield wandered down earlier." Serena said with more than a measure of disdain, "He came down regarding a patient but he seemed keen to look around for you for some reason. I think he knows that you and Doctor Copeland have your little roof top chats and get on well."

"Mmmm" Bernie said in acknowledgement, she also could not make her mind up about Mayfield. Dominic seemed smitten but he did have a habit of falling deep with any man who showed him any affection, even if they were wrong for him…. But only he could decide.

"Not that I know Mr Mayfield very well but he comes across as a bit of an arrogant prick."

Bernie laughed, "That's a fair assessment."

"Oh, guess what I found out today?" Serena was trying to keep Bernie engaged and at least get her to participate a little in the conversation

"Go on?"

"Well as we all know the porters and receptionists are the driving force of the spread of rumours." Serena quite liked Noel Garcia but she swore his dreadlocks held lots and lots of hospital secrets.

"We do."

"Well guess who provides the most fuel to the fire?"

Bernie laughed, she knew exactly who, because he didn't mean it, "Jason?"

"Jason! I've had to speak to him over dinner about spreading gossip. You would have been very amused as it was very awkward for me and Jason was absolutely oblivious. I had to explain that not everything he heard was fact and nor was it for him to pass on, but he pointed out that when I had asked him to keep things to himself regarding you and I, he had. In respect of everything else he had received no specific instruction and so just did what the other porters did. Push trolleys and relay tales to willing ears. In respect of AAU our most grateful recipient of 'porter information' is…"

Bernie cut in, "Fletch?"

"Haha yes. Any bets that go on in this hospital are run by Fletch the bookmaker; it seems he supplements his income substantially.

"Yes, I can imagine." Bernie stifled a yawn. Not unnoticed by Serena.

"You sound tired my love, would you like to go to sleep?"

"I think I probably should, maybe."

"No maybe about it Major, you need to rest. I will see you tomorrow."

"Thank you my darling. Goodnight, love you."

"Love you too." They stayed silent on the line a few moments and Serena took a gamble, "Bernie I'll only go if you are sure you are OK."

"Yes, absolutely. Now go woman, I need my beauty sleep." She hung up before Serena could argue. Bernie was not one for the 'You hang up, no you hang up, no you…."

Serena was a little surprised at the abrupt end to the call but presumed it was more the practical nature of her Major as had it been left to her she would have spent the next 20 minutes drawing out the goodbyes. She decided to go to bed herself as Jason had gone to play on his computer and TV did not really interest her unless she was able to cuddle up to Bernie.

She adjourned to her bed realising that it was not really better there, Bernie should be here. Even if they were keeping silent company that would be better than the cold bed she now faced. With a sigh she changed and resolved herself to a restless night of slumber.

Slumber did not come easy to Bernie either, actually it did not come at all.


	31. Chapter 34

Serena got to the office on time, she was someone who could not tolerate tardiness. She had accepted that Bernie's watch always ran differently to everyone else's. She tolerated this, as yes, Bernie did always enter the ward in a rush but once she was here she more than made up for it and she often stayed longer than her shift stated. Today was different she felt. An hour in and no sign of Bernie. She wasn't usually this late and if she was going to be more than 20 minutes late she usually sent an apologetic message to smooth things over.

Nothing.

After hour two Serena wondered if Bernie had maybe confused her shifts. She had sent three messages to Bernie, but decided that anymore would be overkill, plus message three was final straw, girlfriend or no girlfriend; co lead or not… piss taking could not be tolerated.

The first message was 20 minutes into shift, "Hey you, this is late even by your standards, let me know if you need time. S x"

Message two was an hour in, "Bern, where are you? Your shift is the 10-6. Not sure I can cover your ass much longer. S x"

Message three was very much to the point, "Where the bloody hell are you, call me pronto."

Serena had tried to call too, once from her phone and once from the office phone but it just rang out. Serena's heart sank. Radio silence was never good.

Thankfully AAU was ticking over nicely, the red phone was behaving and the madness was kept to a minimum. She mused over her options as she sat at the nurses' station. Fletch and Raf could see the intense look on Serena's face and decided the best option was to give her a wide berth. They deduced that Bernie's unknown absence on the ward was the root of the storm cloud over the ward.

Serena made a decision, she needed to check if Bernie was OK. She picked up the phone and dialled the number for Hanssen. His secretary answered.

"Ah hello, I was wondering if Mr Hanssen was free for a 5 minute chat."

"When Ms Campbell?" Hanssen had a lovely secretary, she was a great gate keeper without being a monster about it.

"As soon as possible really."

"Let me check with Mr Hanssen, can you hold the line?"

"Of course." Serena replied and held patiently.

"Mr Hanssen said he can see you now if you are able."

"On my way." Serena confirmed.

She pushed herself from the chair and wandered to Raf, "I'm just off to see Mr Hanssen for a quick meeting. I trust everything is in order here?"

"Yes Ms Campbell." He said with a tight smile.

Serena stood in the lift thinking how to approach the matter with Hanssen. Yes Bernie was co-lead but basically she was now an un-authorised absence and quite frankly a concern.

She knocked on the door.

"Come." Came Hanssen's voice from the other side of the door.

"Ms Campbell, please take a seat; how can I help."

Serena sat rather nervously wringing her hands.

"Um, Henrik; I um…"

"Ms Campbell, please take your time." He poured a glass of water and placed it before Serena.

There was a silence, not uncomfortable per se as it seemed that Hanssen, much like Bernie was not one for filling the void with words.

"I have to report an unauthorised absence and, I, I am rather concerned."

"Ms Wolfe?" Hanssen deduced.

Serena nodded.

"I see, when was her shift due to start?"

"Ten."

"Ah, so not just the usual whirling dervish then?"

Serena shook her head.

"I take it you have tried to establish contact."

"Yes." Serena sighed.

"So she is somewhat incommunicado?"

"It would seem so." Serena admitted

Hanssen leaned forward and placed his fingertips together, "How would you like to proceed with this Ms Campbell?"

Serena was a little taken off guard, if she had her way she would be out of the hospital and away to check on Bernie; and Hanssen, it seemed was giving her the permission. She proceeded with caution, in case it was a test, to see if she could separate private and personal. So she thought about it, was it any of her other AAU family; Fletch, Morven, Raf; she would ask for permission to go and check on them, putting the concern she had before anything else. Yes, when it came to Bernie the concern was somewhat amplified but all the same she proposed what she would were it any of the team on her ward.

"If you are agreeable I would like to use my lunch break to go and check that Ber… Ms Wolfe is alright. At the very least we need to ensure that she is safe and well."

"I agree, the safety and wellbeing of any member of staff is the priority; but I would ask that you just go and ensure that Ms Wolfe is well. You need not use your allotted lunch; I am certain Mr Di Luca and Nurse Fletcher are able to hold the fort. I would ask that you keep me abreast of matters. I understand that Ms Wolfe is addressing some personal issues and I assume that this is not unrelated."

Serena gave Hanssen an understanding smile, she had limited information regarding the conversation he had with Bernie other than it seemed that he was understanding of her situation.

"Naturally Henrik. I appreciate your understanding."

"Absolutely."

Serena had to smile inwardly. 'Absolutely' was something Bernie said often and much like her relationship with Jason, she could see why Bernie and Henrik were on the same page. Both strong, but slightly damaged people who were very measured when it came to expressing themselves. She could only imagine how a conversation would flow between them.

"Well Ms Campbell you have places to be, I shall not keep you." He stood to open the door for her. As Serena walked through she lightly touched Hanssen's arm. "Thank you Henrik."

He nodded in acknowledgement. He did hope that Major Wolfe was alright, not just for Serena's sake; but her own. He knew how hard things must be for her at this time and only hoped that if she should need support she knew it could be sought here.


	32. Chapter 35

After Serena had checked on AAU and simply said she was taking an early lunch she got in her car and drove to Bernie's flat at breakneck speed. She did consider texting or calling but then she had not had any response previously and in all honesty she did not want Bernie to give her an excuse to not check on her.

She arrived and saw Bernie's car parked in its usual spot. She rang the buzzer to get Bernie's attention but after the third attempt she decided that Bernie was purposely not answering or she could not answer. Damn it to the fallout she decided to let herself in. Bernie had given her a spare fob and key shortly after she had received keys to Serena's house. She, rather unromantically declared it was a fair swap and on top of that she needed someone to hold spare key, and Serena seemed the obvious choice.

Serena eased her conscious about letting herself in by justifying that Bernie had furnished her with the means to enter should the need arise; and in Serena's eyes it had.

Serena entered the flat and called out to Bernie. Absolutely no answer. She started to wander the flat, living room, kitchen, and bedroom. Bedroom; Bernie was passed out on the bed. Serena had been a doctor long enough to know someone sleeping from someone passed out pissed. Bernie was passed out; surrounding evidence of a virtually empty Whiskey bottle and a tipped over tumbler, as well as an ashtray on the bedside table told Serena all she needed to know.

Thankfully Bernie had not been sick and, as Serena was aware, Bernie naturally slept in a recovery position of sorts. She could see Bernie was breathing, albeit shallowly. She checked her pulse, a little slow. She sat on the bet and shook Bernie to wake her; "Bernie," she shook her again and said a little louder, "Bern, Bernie!" A little stir but nothing akin to waking.

Serena leaned in and grabbed Bernie's face in her hands, "Major Wolfe, I need you to wake up!" She said very loudly.

Bernie groaned, "Fuck off!" Bernie said lazily now stirring.

"Fuck off yourself." Serena was feeling something between relief and anger. "I'm not going anywhere Major. Now if you are going to tell me to fuck off a least look at me when you do it."

Bernie did her level best to compose herself to focus on the person who was shaking her to reality. What the hell had she done last night? She then groaned at the realisation that drunk, restless Bernie had remembered the special reserve whiskey at the back of the cupboard and decided that was a suitable replacement for sleeping pills. She moved her head and the room spun uncontrollably. "Serena, I'm sorry. Just leave me to sort my own mess, you don't need this. Just go." The words were quite concise in Bernie's mind but they came out as a drunken drawl.

"No way, I am going to make some strong coffee and then you are going to level with me; no argument."

Bernie had no strength to argue. But she knew Serena was a little scary when she was in full Campbell mode.

Serena left the bedroom picking up the bottle and glass on the way, no affection towards the woman pulling herself together on the bed.

As the kettle boiled Serena pulled her phone out and sent a message to Hanssen.

"I am with Ms Wolfe, she is safe and well (?) I may be longer than I anticipated. I will update you upon my return today."

She made a strong black coffee for Bernie and a coffee for herself, which was also black due to the lack of in date milk. _Christ almighty she can patch up soldiers in warzones and fix serious traumas but looking after herself is a big feat._ Serena felt quite sad that the contents of the fridge consisted of a small tub of butter, a few bottles of Bud and condiments.

Her phone went off, Hanssen, "Thank you Ms Campbell, and take as long as is needed; please ensure that matters are in hand and I shall remain here for your update."

Serena had been toying with asking Bernie to move in, especially given that she was at hers more often than not and Jason loved having her around. Now seeing the contents of the fridge, or lack of, she decided that it really would be the best option. Just to check that she wasn't jumping ahead she checked the cupboard. No bread, no biscuits, no cereal. Pot noodles, cup a soups, instant mash. Serena shut the cupboard with a sigh and grabbed the coffee mugs. _Once more unto the breach._

Bernie was now sitting up of sorts, shame and nausea washing over her in equal measures. Serena sat on the bed next to Bernie, she did smell like a distillery and looked like shit, but probably felt a lot worse, so she decided to contain her anger as this would not achieve anything; and would probably make Bernie feel a little more guilty if Serena was empathetic and kind to her.

Serena passed over a mug to Bernie. "So… is this what happens if I leave you alone for one night?"

Bernie had no answer. She looked blank.

"Do you know what day it is, what time it is?" Serena asked quietly, seriously. Bernie reached for her phone. Serena grabbed her wrist, "No, no cheating. Do you have any idea?"

Bernie looked down, an admission that she had no clue.

"Why the bloody hell do you think I am here, letting myself into your flat?" The tone of Serena's voice remained steady but raised a little as her anger started to creep in. "Here check your phone!" The last sentence reflected her anger as she picked up Bernie's phone as she all but threw it at Bernie.

Bernie fumbled to catch it and saw it was after lunch time and she had a number of texts and missed calls. She threw the phone across the room and dropped her head.

"Look Bern, not going to say I'm happy about this, I'm bloody livid. You have put me in a right position; but I love you and care about you. Over 3 hours late for work, and radio silence again," She sighed, "I had to go to Hanssen to express my concern; luckily for you it seems he is as emotionally barren as you are so he has an empathy for you."

Bernie took a sip of coffee hoping it would offer comfort or solace; neither appeared.

Serena picked up the conversation again, conscious of what she said but also feeling that there were certain things that needed to be said, regardless of how it would make Bernie feel. She turned to face Bernie, hoping the gesture would be returned. "Look I can smooth things at the hospital, Henrik understands, he really does… but I worry… I, I don't like the thought of you being here alone; I mean, if this is what happens."

Bernie did turn to look at Serena, so she took the plunge, "I'm not saying you need to move in, I'm not asking you to get rid of the flat, but please would you consider letting myself and Jason support you more?"

Tears were forming in Bernie's eyes, she was not sure if she could prevent them from falling.

"It's OK to want support and help. Jason and I have learned this over time. He supports me as much as I support him and that really is OK and we really want you to be part of that; if you would only allow yourself."

"Really?" Bernie asks with genuine curiosity.

"Yes really. Jason likes having you around actually because you are 'less boring' than me, his words. Also you can play scrabble, backgammon and chess; you also give him a run for his money on the quiz shows. As for me you know I love having you around and the fact that you and Jason are as thick as thieves, well…. That is something I think I can live with."

Bernie was taking in the words, "Seriously?"

"Do I look like I am joking Wolfe?"

There was a pregnant pause, "No, no; you are serious I know, I just…."

"Just stop. Take the offer as it is. There are people who really bloody care about you, it would not do you any harm to let them in."

Bernie relented, "OK, yeah, I need to pull myself together and get some stuff sorted but yes. If you want this," She motioned to her as a person, "Then who am I to stop you."

"You can't, you will find I am very stubborn when it comes to getting what I want." Serena said seriously as he drained her mug.

Bernie nodded, "Look, I'm sorry. But… I don't think I'm fit to go to work today. I will face the music tomorrow."

Serena raised her hand to Bernie's hair and grazed the side of her face, "I will smooth things over at the ranch. You sort yourself out and get your things together. I promise I will come back soon to pick you up."

Bernie was nodding the whole time, totally engrossed in Serena's faith in her.

"I'm sorry Serena…"

Serena cut her short, "Stop with the sorry. I may have to invest in a sorry jar if you continue. I don't want to go but let me sort things with Hanssen and check AAU has not fallen into disarray and then I will be back to fetch you. I will cook for you. Something tells me you have not eaten well since you left mine.

Bernie looks sheepish, "I, um, no I haven't. Bit crap to be honest. I will eat whatever you cook, but don't go to a special effort for me."

"No effort at all Bernie, just understand that." She planted a kiss to Bernie's forehead, "I'd kiss you but I think if I did I may be over the drink drive limit my love. I must dash, damage limitation to perform."

"Off you pop. I promise I will be sorted when you return."

With that Serena stood and left before she was pulled further back.


	33. Chapter 36

Author note: Thanks for all the lovely comments, it really is spurring me on. I'm sorry about the angst-y phase we are going through but as we know no relationship is all sunshine and lollypops and lots of sex. There is real life too.

Also I hope nobody minds the inclusion of Hanssen. I think he adds value and I think after Berina he is my favourite character.

And so on to... CH 36

Serena returned to the ward and Raf noticed that seemed a little calmer than when she had left, but he still thought she looked….. worried. Yes worried was the word. It must be something to do with Bernie because she was supposed to be on shift today. In Serena's absence Mr Hanssen had been down to ask about the surgery schedule. He sat at the computer at the nurses' station and did some creative rescheduling. It was a very strange sight to see the CEO sitting bolt upright at the desk in the middle of the ward. "Mr Di Luca, I have made some minor alterations to the schedule to allow for staffing issues. Please can you ask Ms Campbell to come and see me upon her return?" He turned on his heel and left before Raf could ask when Ms Campbell would be back.

Serena came over to Raf, "Sorry I was such a long time Raf, all sorted now though. Has everything been OK here?"

"Um yes Ms Campbell, is Ber… Ms Wolfe OK?"

Serena nodded slightly, "She will be back tomorrow."

"Oh Mr Hanssen came down, made some changes to the surgery schedule and has asked if you could go up to see him when you return."

"Already on my way." She called as she made off through the doors.

Serena knocked on the door of Henrik's office, although she got on with him, and he was a fair man; she always found entering his office a little daunting. Especially if you did not know what to expect.

"Come." Came the usual response. "Ah Ms Campbell, please take a seat." He gestured to the chair, "How is Ms Wolfe?"

"Can I be honest Henrik?" Serena thought it best to level with the stoic Swede.

"I would expect nothing less Serena." It was not often he called her by her first name, this must be him showing warmth. "Anything you say in here will remain within this office, between us."

"Thank you." Serena took a breath. "Ms Wolfe, Bernie is, she finds it difficult..."

Hanssen raised his neck a little and looked like he was going to say something profound to assist Serena, "Addressing one's mental health can be a difficult experience, and it takes a certain strength of character to face up to these things. I would be surprised if you told me that Ms Wolfe is taking all of this in her stride."

Serena smiled, he really did understand these matters. "Well she isn't coping too well. Her way of coping is a bit rubbish, hence her absence today; she um, is in no fit state to come to work today but I have insisted that she comes to stay with me so that I can look after her and she will be back tomorrow" She was not willing to admit to Hanssen that Bernie was comatose after downing a bottle of expensive scotch, he could draw his own conclusions form this statement.

Henrik tilted his head to the side, he was aware of their relationship and was actually rather pleased for them both. He had not thought about their living arrangements, naturally the hospital buzzed with all sorts of rumours and theories; but he never took any notice of these. He knew Serena had a very caring nature given her responsibilities towards Jason and obviously he knew Serena would put him before anyone, but maybe Ms Wolfe was receiving equal pegging given Serena's natural need to want to care for her.

"Are you sure Ms Wolfe will be alright to return tomorrow, I have said that should she need time off she only need ask. I know she has leave to take, or maybe we could work with HR to arrange compassionate leave of sorts."

"That is something you would have to discuss with Ms Wolfe. I imagine she would decline such an offer as she likes to keep busy and occupied. Her own company is not always best for her. Plus I can keep an eye on her here."

"Very well. May I ask you a rather personal question Serena? You do not need to answer, of course."

Serena nodded.

"Are you coping?" Serena looked and furrowed her brow in confusion as to why he would ask. He decided to elaborate a little, "What with young Jason to care for and Ms Wolfe needing your support; as well as your duties here; are you coping?"

She nodded, "I care very much about Jason and Bernie, I want nothing more than for them to be safe and happy. My main problem is getting Ms Wolfe to accept such support. But she is coming around to the idea. As for the hospital, I assure you Henrik things will continue to run smoothly; should there be any issues you will be the first to know."

They sat for a moment in silence. "Thank you for accepting that my assistance is always available. I often find; much like yourself; that when assistance is offered it is not always taken. It may be pride, it may be a feeling of weakness, it might be shame that stops people. But as you know, it is always OK to ask for and accept help."

He stood, "Would you like to accompany me to the lift, I have an overwhelming urge to make my presence felt on Keller ward." He said with a wry smile.

Serena gave a small laugh and offered her hand to Hanssen to shake, "Thank you Henrik."

With that they left the office and headed to the lift.


	34. Chapter 37

Serena arrived at the flat after her shift and Bernie was ready and waiting; outside with her rucksack and few other bits. She was sitting on the wall smoking. As she saw Serena's car pull up she waved and stubbed out the cigarette, blowing out the last of the smoke and waving the smoke away with her hand. She went to the boot to throw her stuff into the boot and then climbed into the passenger seat.

Serena leaned over still holding the steering wheel and placed a lingering kiss to Bernie's lips, "How are you feeling darling?"

"Much better. Honestly, I am sorry about earlier."

Serena had started the engine and was pulling off, she looked across and put her hand on Bernie's thigh, "Forget about it now. No lasting damage done, water under the bridge."

Bernie placed her hand on top of Serena's. "Thank you. I promise I will perk up, I don't want Jason to see me in a state."

"Serena kept her eyes ahead as she had to move her hand to change gear, "A slightly perkier Bernie would be nice but you don't have to worry about Jason. He is stopping at Alan's tonight. So it's just you and I. "

"What, so we can talk." Bernie asked hoping that tonight was not going to be all about Serena getting her to open up.

"No, not if you don't want to darling. I am not going to force you to do anything you don't want to do. I just want you safe and protected is all."

Bernie sat back and closed her eyes as Serena was pulling into the drive, "Is curry OK?"

"Only if it is not too much trouble."

Serena turned off the ignition and turned to face Bernie, "No trouble at all."

She got out of the car and went to the boot to pull out the bags, Bernie called out, "Let me get those." She came round to where Serena was and snaked her arm around her waist, "I really don't deserve you." She whispered as she picked up the bags. Serena's heart tugged as she wondered if that was what Bernie truly believed. She would need to rectify it as soon as they were inside. She rushed to the door as the heavens had just opened up and it was heavy cold rain.

Serena was through the door and her coat hung as Bernie followed through and put everything down and shook herself to rid her coat of the rain. Serena went up and started to undo Bernie's coat, in a caring, not sexual manner. "Let's get you out of that wet coat eh." Bernie smiled, "Listen, you don't truly think that do you?"

"What?"

"That you don't deserve me." Serena said quietly as she hung Bernie's coat next to her.

Bernie didn't know, she didn't think so, she knew she was bloody lucky to have Serena. She grabbed Serena's hand and pulled her through to the living room. Bernie sat and invited Serena to straddle her lap. "It's, it isn't that simple. You are so, so wonderful. You give me purpose, make me feel useful, wanted, loved." Bernie is looking directly at Serena, to show the sincerity in her words. Her hands on Serena's hips under her blouse. "I'm not exactly sure what I offer you, other than a myriad of problems."

Serena rested her forehead to Bernie's and cupped her face in her hands. "You offer me comfort and love. Bernie there are so many good things about you that you just don't see. You always have my back. You have been my support just as I am yours." She kissed Bernie, "Jason and I would not be without you now. Even Ellie is asking for membership to your exclusive fan club."

"Really." Came the surprised response.

"Really really. She called me yesterday and she thinks you are funny and chivalrous. She said you 'were a keeper'. And I agree."

Serena kissed her again and ran her fingers into the hair she just loved to mess up. "If I have to I will remind you every day until you get it into your head that it is me who is the lucky one. The Major stopped running for little old me."

Bernie smiled.

"I just need you to have some faith in yourself, you are brilliant and I know you are not perfect; as nobody is. But I accept the whole Major Berenice Grizelda Wolfe package." Serena wrapped her in a huge hug which Bernie returned. "Now as much as I love this." She wiggles on Bernie's lap, "I need to make good on my promise to make sure you eat properly. Why don't you take your stuff upstairs while I make a start on the curry."


	35. Chapter 38

Bernie came down after a while and Serena was at the cooker in her apron stirring the curry having just weighed out rice. Bernie decided to sneak up and grab around her waist and kiss her neck. Bernie loved it because it always made Serena jump.

As she kissed her neck Serena did indeed jump, "You silly bugger, the curry nearly went everywhere." She said in a teasing tone. Bernie smelled great, she had showered and changed. It was like one Bernie had gone upstairs and her Bernie had come down, transformed. "If you are going to loiter, try the curry, let me know what you think." Serena took a fork and scooped a forkful for Bernie, she turned around in her arms and held out the fork. Bernie, not letting go of Serena's waist leaned forward to accept the food.

"Mmmm, perfect." She moved her hands down to Serena's arse and gave a little squeeze.

"What, my arse or my curry?"

Bernie tipped her head, "Both." She planted a kiss on Serena's lips. "How long until it's ready I'm starving?"

"About 20 minutes." Serena suddenly yelped as Bernie picked her up and wrapped Serena's legs around her waist and made for the stairs. "My Big Macho Army Medic!" She exclaimed as she clung on the Bernie as she carried her up the stairs.

"Mmmm just enough time to get you out of those work clothes Frauline."

As they got through the door Bernie lowered Serena to the bed, so that Serena was sitting on the end and Bernie was kneeling between her legs. Without breaking the kisses Bernie undid her blouse and removed it, she then ran her hands up Serena's sides to get her to lift her arms to remove her camisole, Serena laughed into the kiss as Bernie's touch running from her hips to her armpits always tickled; and Bernie knew it.

Bernie moved down, planting kisses to Serena's jaw and neck; "I'm sorry I didn't stay last night, I missed you." She said between kisses. Serena planted a kiss in Bernie's hair to confirm that it was OK, "I missed you too." Serena moaned as Bernie was working on a love bite on her left breast having removed her bra.

Bernie was working quickly as she was aware that the curry was simmering downstairs, but she needed this first. As she sucked and bit on Serena's right nipple her hands were running across Serena's torso and then worked to her hips, around to the front to undo her trousers.

"Ahhhhh Bernie, I need you." Serena moaned as she was now fully aroused, _the fucking curry will be fine for a few minutes more_ she told herself. She lifted her arse slightly as Bernie stripped her of her knickers and trousers, she even removed her socks.

Bernie bought herself up to kiss Serena, "Are you sure?"

"Good god yes." Serena said in desperation.

Bernie kissed Serena deeply, exploring her mouth with her tongue as she found Serena's core and started to fuck her slow and deep.

"Yes!" Serena exclaimed as Bernie hit her G spot. "I'm going to come!" Bernie curled her fingers inside Serena as she released, coming over Bernie's hand. "WOW!"

Bernie gently removed her fingers from inside as Serena was tight, throbbing with pleasure. She didn't want to hurt her. "Are you OK Serena?" Bernie asked quietly as Serena had covered her face with her bended arm, lying back on the bed.

She nodded, "Mmmm just recovering." She grabbed Bernie's hand. "Can you give me 2 minutes? Why don't you sort drinks sweetheart."

"OK if you are sure you are OK."

"Mmmm. Yes. More than OK." She panted.

Bernie kissed Serena's stomach and left the room.

Serena lay there for a minute. Bernie really had given her a good seeing to, her head was still spinning and she really couldn't feel anything below her waist. "Fucking hell." She muttered to herself. _How does she always manage to reduce me to a puddle on the floor._

Serena sat up and a wicked smiled played on her face as she retrieved her underwear and the apron… leaving all other clothing where it was thrown.

Bernie had laid the table, lit a candle, put on the radio and opened the wine to breathe. She could hear Serena coming down the stairs. Her heart skipped a beat as Serena walked past her to the cooker wearing her sexy matching underwear, her apron and her trademark cheeky smile.

"Jesus Christ Serena!" Bernie was rooted to the spot.

Serena switched off the rice and the curry and sashayed over with poppadum's and dips as a starter, she planted a small kiss to Bernie's cheeky, "Come on Major, pop your eyes back in and get the wine poured."

This awoke Bernie from her stunned state as she sat adjacent to Serena. She tucked into the starter as she was bloody starving realising that she had not eaten for over 24 hours. Serena sat and lazily ate one poppadum letting Bernie eat the rest. Serena could not help but watch her wonderful Bernie. This time it was her who was caught staring.

"You know it's quite off putting trying to eat when you are being gawped at." Bernie said with her mouth full.

"Sorry love, I just love seeing you content and eating, because I imagine you lied yesterday on the phone when I asked if you had eaten."

Bernie stopped eating, she looked sheepish, "How did you know?"

"Because I know you and also know you have no food in your house, unless you count cuppa soup and smash."

"I'm sorry."

"Stop with the sorry darling, just enjoy your food. Can you see why I want you here, I love you and want to make sure you are well…. And well fed."

She swept up the starter plate and bought over the curry and rice, it was in proper curry bowls and they had other sides and naan bread too. Both sat and polished off the lot as they talked easily and laughed, a lot.

Serena loaded the dish washer as Bernie sat, stuffed, drinking her wine. Serena then took off the apron and switched it for a long silk robe.

"You are so sexy. Did you know that?" Bernie stated more than asking.

Serena turned and looked over her shoulder and wiggled her bottom before turning around and flashing Bernie a full frontal view of the underwear before tying up the robe.

"And a tease too!" They both laughed as Serena came over to top up wine. Bernie wrapped her arm around Serena and pulled her to sit on her lap. "Oh and exactly how many pairs of matching underwear do you have?"

"More than you?!" Serena joked.

"Well that isn't hard, nothing of mine matches; but seriously how many, I don't think I've seen you wear the same set twice, and I have seen quite a bit of your underwear." Bernie gave Serena a little squeeze on her side knowing it would induce a laugh.

"What can I say, I've always had a penchant for sexy underwear; especially when I have someone who appreciates it to show it too."

Bernie leaned in for a kiss which Serena was hungry for. They kissed and groped for some time taking advantage of the fact that they could be so free in the kitchen without Jason walking in on them.

Their bliss was broken by the doorbell. _Who the bloody hell is this?_ Serena wondered as she got up to answer the door.


	36. Chapter 39

Author note:

thanks again for all the positive comments, I enjoy writing and will continue to do so as long as people enjoy reading.

Please let me know what you think of this chapter and what you would like to see for the big 4 0 chapter, would you like to know what happens next (cheeky wink) or skip to work the next day.

Happy Sunday Berina-kins

Ch 39

Serena opened the door to find Robbie standing there with a large bunch of flowers. "Serena."

"Robbie… what are you doing here?"

"Um, can I come in?" He looked pleadingly.

"No, I'm busy, please leave." There is no mistaking the hostile tone in her voice. Bernie was listening and decided to go out to the hallway. She came up behind Serena and placed a protective arm around her shoulder bringing her into her body slightly. Thankfully, for once, Serena was not startled; she seemed grateful for the reinforcements.

"I see, busy with Army Dyke Barbie." He threw his head back in a laugh. "Decided to shack up with the next poor unfortunate soul who took a shine to you. I mean you come with baggage and you're not exactly in your prime. Talking of baggage where have you shipped the retard off to while you sink your claws into this one."

Serena felt Bernie tense up and saw her right hand clenching. _How dare he show up here and upset Serena. How dare he speak about Jason like that. Jason was ten times the man this scumbag was._

Serena wrapped her arm around the back of Bernie's waist and gave a squeeze to her hip followed by making patterns with the pad of her thumb. She could feel Bernie's breathing and new she was trying to restrain herself.

"She wants to deck me doesn't she Serena?" Robbie smirked. "Come on then, give it your best shot."

Bernie, who was starting to simmer down; felt her anger rising and went to step forward.

Serena placed her right hand on Bernie's abs, "He isn't worth it Bernie." She directed a deathly stare to Robbie, "If she did punch you, you would definitely need a bloody doctor. But not this one."

Robbie looked at the scene in front of him, _there's no way Serena is happy with this substitute!_ "Why are you so angry Bernie, is it because you know Serena needs a real man and you are just, well, something to fill the gap for now?"

"Shut up Robbie." Serena all but shouted at him. "Why the hell would I settle for a McDonalds Happy Meal from the drive through" She swept her arm motioning to Robbie, "When I have prime steak here at home." Her hand returning to Bernie's stomach.

"Ha, you are joking right! I know exactly what you need to be satisfied, no woman can offer you that Sweetheart."

Serena was now virtually holding Bernie back, "Poor Robbie, you no idea! I did think you could satisfy me but quite frankly in comparison to what I have now, you were crap. I don't have to fake orgasms anymore, or pretend that I'm asleep." She said the words to her last sentence slowly to ensure that it sank in. He just stood there his mouth agape. Bernie seemed to relax a little as Robbie was definitely winded by that comment.

"Now if you wouldn't mind buggering off and not coming back that would be great; and I will say this only once; if you come back here, or to the hospital I will call the police and report you harassment. This," she waved her arm in his direction, "Is what this is. I don't want you anymore. I have everything I want and need with Bernie."

With that she slammed the door as she pulled Bernie back. She looked through the spy hole to see Robbie throw the flowers at the door and head to his car and speed up. She turned round, Bernie stood stock still both fists clenched, she was breathing heavily, "You should have let me deck him."

Serena ran her hands down Bernie's arms and grabbed her wrists, putting her fingers to Bernie's pulse points. Her pulse was racing, "No darling, that would have played right into his hands. I need you to calm down for me please." She was now rubbing the pulse points with the flat of her thumbs and looking into Bernie's eyes encouraging her to match her breathing. "Had you hit him you would be in a police cell now; remember he has a lot of clout. He would have claimed he was visiting me in peace and he got KO'd by his exes crazy girlfriend." Serena instantly regretted her last sentence, _FUCK!_ She was thinking how to back track. She did not think Bernie was crazy. At all. Before she could fix the situation Bernie looked up, "Is that what you think, that I'm fucking crazy?" Her tone cold and serious.

Serena let go of her wrists and wrapped Bernie in a hug that included her arms, "Good god no, darling no. I think you are wonderfully sane. You, you are not crazy. That bastard deserved a punch on the nose, but if you did, he would have twisted it and made it look like an unprovoked attack."

She looked at Bernie, she looked wounded. Serena started to cry, "Please believe me darling." _FUCK!_

Bernie wriggled free of Serena's grip and gave her a small smile and gave her a peck on the lips. "As long as you don't think I'm crazy…. Is it OK if I get some air."

Serena wiped her tears, "If it helps." She opened the door for Bernie as she was now in her trainers and coat.

Bernie gave Serena a look as the door closed. Bernie picked up the abandoned flowers and put them in the outside bin, she then paced. She went for her cigarettes and put one between her lips as she went for the lighter. She sat on the wall as she flicked the lighter on, and then off as she decided not to light the cigarette. For some time she sat on the wall focusing on the flame of the lighter going on and then off. The unlit cigarette remaining in her mouth. She felt herself calming as she replayed the door step scene. Serena had been wonderful. She only hoped that Serena was not too upset by that bastard's words and the fact that Bernie got angry. Serena did really cut him down with her words, Bernie wondered if it was all true. After some time she made for the door as she suddenly realised she had left Serena alone for a while and she would also be recalling the poison that Robbie had spouted.

Serena paced the kitchen with her wine, "Fucking bastard!" She said to the kitchen. _How bloody dare he!_ She did not care what he had said about her. But Jason, Bernie; they did not deserve that. She should have kneed him in the balls, he would have required surgery to retrieve his testicles from his stomach. "Bastard."

She started cleaning the kitchen work top and put everything else in the dishwasher needing to do something to contain her anger. Once the kitchen was as clean as it could possibly be she sat at the table and topped up her wine. Bernie had been outside ages, she wanted to go out but knew not to, Bernie needed that space; she would come in when she was ready. _Jesus Bernie does not need this after everything._ She laid her head in her arms on the table and cried loud tears in frustration.

She did not hear Bernie come in whilst she was breaking her heart, she just felt strong hands lift her from her position and arms wrap around her. "Serena, I'm here, please stop crying; he is not worth your tears." Bernie lifted Serena's face and wiped the tears. "Your words did more damage to him than a broken nose from me would have done. You were right to stop me hitting him." Serena nodded and Bernie kissed her passionately seeking permission with her tongue to explore deeper. Serena was surprised as Bernie had been outside for such a long time but she did not taste or smell of smoke at all, she pulled back at the surprise.

Bernie looked at her in confusion. "Serena?"

"I thought you had gone out to smoke? You didn't did you?"

Bernie shook her head. "No, I just needed time to calm down and think. I didn't need a smoke." Serena stroked Bernie's face, "I'm learning to manage my emotions better; not always good at it, but it takes practice." Serena realised that Bernie was giving her a small insight into her mind. Serena knew that when it came to Bernie it was better not to ask, but rather wait and accept these moments of openness.

Serena resumed their kiss as Bernie pushed Serena against the kitchen table, she broke the kiss to catch her breath, "Er, Um, was everything you said to Robbie true? The faking it…. Etcetera?"

"Yes, true. All true."

"And you never have to fake it with me do you?" Bernie asked knowing the answer but still a little doubtful.

"Oh come on, you know the answer to that." Serena answered kissing deeper. Bernie pushed into her grinding into her and pushing her against the table. Bernie undid the robe and pushed it off Serena's shoulders so that it dropped onto the table. She stepped back to admire Serena in the sexy lingerie. "My god. You are fucking gorgeous. I can't get enough of you." She plays with the fabric on the bra with one hand and the knickers with the other. "You know, I think I have decided I like your underwear better on you than on the bedroom floor. You look amazing, a goddess before me. Plus I like that there is still a bit of hidden mystery." Bernie ran her hand over Serena's knickers feeling how wet her core was through the fabric.

Serena could feel herself unravelling once again for the Major.

"What about if my underwear were on the kitchen floor, what would you think then?" Serena flashed her dirtiest smile.


	37. Chapter 40

Bernie had her hands on Serena's hips, playing with the elastic on the sexy knickers, "Pardon?"

Serena, was an ocean of calm despite the fire raging inside of her, "You heard me Major." She started to undo the button on Bernie's loose top, "I think you may to test your theory elsewhere; here…. Now." She pushed her top off and make for the button and zip on her trousers, "It's simple, you need to see if my underwear looks better on me, or there on the floor." She nodded her head vaguely in the direction of the kitchen floor as she pulled Bernie's trousers down for her to step out of. Bernie now stood gobsmacked in the kitchen in her bra and pants. Serena continued her slow seductive explanation, "So all you need to do, is decide if my underwear is better on me." She reaches behind, undoes her bra and pulls it off; throwing it to the floor "Or whether it is better over there."

Bernie was trying to compose herself as she looked from Serena's face, to her breasts, to her knickers and then to the bra abandoned on the floor. She was currently stood a step apart from Serena with her hands still on the sides of the sexy knickers, subconsciously playing with the lace on them. Serena lowered her voice, "Take your time, I expect you to conduct a thorough experiment." Bernie could feel herself trembling at the power Serena had over her. She never thought that when she fell for Serena that she would be the sexual force that she was.

Bernie slowly hooked the sides of Serena's knickers and pulled them down her legs for her to step out of. Bernie discarded them in the general direction of the bra and was impressed that they ended up together. She stood back, wearing a purposely questioning face as she looked at Serena, then to her breasts, down to her pubic area and then to the underwear. "Mmmmmmm" She tipped her head and smiled; she knew that always got Serena.

She suddenly pounced and grabbed Serena by the hips pushing her against the table and grinding into her, her mouth meeting with her neck as she kissed deeply. "Hey, watch the hickies; we aren't fourteen anymore!" Serena exclaimed jokingly. Bernie ceased her assault and went to Serena's ear. "What would you like me to do?"

Serena saw an opportunity and felt she knew Bernie enough to know she would take it. She leant into Bernie's ear "I think you need to eat me off this table Major."

 _Holy fucking shit!_ Bernie is fairly sure those eleven words just caused her to orgasm but she was not going to miss an opportunity to satisfy this insatiable woman. She lifted Serena on to the sold oak table. _Good thing it's solid oak!_ So that she was resting on the robe. Without words Bernie pushed Serena back so that she was lying on the table and her legs were pushed push so that her feet were also resting on the table. Bernie had full access and was not going to let it go to waste.

She let her mouth go straight to the source that was crying out for it. She ran her tongue through Serena's wetness. Serena moaned into it pleasingly. Bernie knew she was on to a winner here.

It took all of Bernie's resolve not to rush this and get them both to where they needed to be. She worked her tongue over Serena's clit, and then as she felt her rising to this she moved her tongue to her opening; thrusting inside. She could feel Serena tighten and she then moved to kissing her thighs. She wanted to test her insatiable woman. Every time she felt Serena rising she would switch gear, prolonging the experience for them both.

Serena lay on the table and was literally seeing stars as Bernie worked her into a frenzy. She made encouraging sounds as Bernie switched her attack on her senses. She did not know what was coming next. Before she knew it an involuntary laugh left her lips. This seemed to halt her lover for a second, "Serena?"

"Sorry Bern." She said between breaths, "I'll never be able to look at this table in the same way now!" She laughed.

"Oh thanks, neither will I now; cheers!"

They both laughed. Bernie continued her assault as she found time to comment, "I can't believe I'm eating you out on the table!"

Bernie did not expect it but that comment sent Serena wild. "Oh god Bernie. I never thought it, that's so hot." Bernie was pleasuring the woman she worshipped as she felt her buck beneath her as Serena came hard.

Bernie took a final swipe knowing that Serena was probably close to too much as she climbed onto the table to straddle Serena.

"Oh my god, that was…. "Serena kissed into Bernie now they were face to face, "I'm spent." She kissed Bernie and accepted Bernie's body rolling against hers. Bernie could feel herself close to the edge. She looked Serena in the eyes as she came, knowing she had given they woman she loves ultimate pleasure.

"Good god Bernie, where did you learn to be such an amazing lover."

Bernie smiled as she lay on her side next to Serena, she beamed, "HA, amazing?"

"Yes, amazing."

"I'm your 'prime steak'!" She laughed, "No seriously, loving you is easy. You are the fire within me Serena." They kiss lazily and then they remember they are naked on the kitchen table, "Um, would you prefer to snuggle under the covers darling? I for one am too old and knackered to pretend that this is now comfortable."

Serena smiled and then grimaced, "Thank God, my back is killing me. Take me to bed Major."


	38. Chapter 41

They had been at work for about three hours. As far as the staff on AAU were concerned Bernie had a 24 hour bug yesterday and Serena had gone to check on her mid shift as Bernie had not answered her phone due to being so ill. Only Hanssen knew the truth and even then it was not a full disclosure.

Serena knew that Hanssen was due in any time and would be wanting to see Bernie. He had not scheduled in a meeting, it was more his style to call during a gap in his schedule or to appear on the ward; that man really could give Bernie a run for her money on the sneaking about stakes, he was ninja level.

Bernie entered the office after a complicated surgery, she sat in her chair and stretched out. She closed her eyes for a minute.

Serena braved it, "Bern, you know Henrik will want to speak to you at some point today."

"Mmmmm." Came the reply.

"It might be good if you call his secretary to express your need to speak to him, showing that you…."

"Proactive, yes." She nodded eyes still closed.

"Are you OK Bernie?"

"Mmmm yes, bit of a mussy head. I'm going to get some air and then I will seek out our fearless leader for a chat."

With that she stood and pulled her hoodie from the chair zipping it up. "Promise."

Before Serena could argue Bernie left as Morven appeared, "Ms Campbell, can you take a look at the gent in bay 4; I need a second opinion."

"Of course, lead on Dr Digby."

Bernie walked out into the freedom of the roof. She settled in her usual spot and closed her eyes; rubbing her temples. She had felt the emotions of the last couple of day were finally catching up with her. The counselling, the being MIA from work, the visit from Serena, Robbie bloody showing up and the intimacy and truth between Serena and her. It was a lot to take on.

She exhaled a large breath as she felt normality restoring and knew she would need to change out of her scrubs and face the music with Hanssen. From what Serena had told her of yesterday, and her knowledge of Hanssen in general; he had been good about the whole thing, he was a good man. Serena considered him a friend and confidant, so in her book he must be pretty decent.

Her thoughts were interrupted by someone clearing their throat, she opened her eyes, "Ah Ms Wolfe would you mind if I joined you." Hanssen asked very politely, not motioning to sit until she confirmed that it was OK.

She looked up, from this angle he was taller than he usually seemed, "Um, please do, of course."

"Forgive me for the intrusion Ms Wolfe, I sought to find you on AAU but Serena told me you would be here."

Bernie looked at him directly as if to indicate that the intrusion was accepted, she did not mind.

Hanssen offered Bernie one of two takeaway cups he was holding, "I thought you may appreciate a cup of tea; I know it is an awfully British tradition but I feel there is some weight behind this particular myth."

Bernie accepted the cup graciously, "Thank you."

They exchanged thin smiles.

"So, Ms Wolfe, I apologise for cutting to the chase but I need to discuss yesterday. Serena was very concerned regarding your welfare and the fact that you did not show up for work. I am glad that she felt able to approach me regarding this as I will always offer support to those who ask for it." He decided not to look directly at Ms Wolfe, unlike Serena; who very much wore her heart on her sleeve; Ms Wolfe was a little emotionally reserved and would probably appreciate a conversation devoid of eye contact. On this matter he felt that he and Ms Wolfe would be on the same page. His next words were selected carefully and spoken with a degree of measure. "Do you recall out last meeting?"

"I do, yes." Bernie confirmed, not sure where Hanssen was going with this.

"I asked you if your current…. Situation… affected your work. Your answer was no." He paused and cast a fleeting glance to Bernie to see if she could register where the conversation was going.

"Yesterday it did, in fact, affect your work; but also Serena's." He paused. "I am not an unreasonable person Ms Wolfe; the opposite I would like to think; but I cannot afford to have two of my best frontline consultants out of action unexpectedly. Do you understand?" His words were soft and showed genuine concern, but at the end of the day he had a hospital to run.

"Understood Mr Hanssen. I can assure you that it will not happen again. Serena; Ms Campbell; has put measures in place to assist me. I have recently learned it is OK to accept help from those who care." Her head was dipped as she spoke.

"Indeed. Yes often the first step is accepting the help, don't you think?"

Bernie turned to look at Hanssen and smiled.

"You will also recall during our last conversation that I am aware you have leave to take and it may be prudent to take some time off when you need time to process."

"Thank you Mr Hanssen I will bear that in mind."

"Yesterday should go down as an unauthorised absence, as you well know, but please leave it with me. I will speak to Human resources and see if we cannot record this as a compassionate leave day." He paused, "But I would ask only one thing of you."

Bernie nodded, thinking that Hanssen would say something along the lines of 'Don't let it happen again'.

"I would ask that you consider Serena's feelings during your… journey. I have known Serena long enough now, and she is a very emotional person; as I am sure you know." He paused to turn to Bernie. Bernie was aware that he was not finished, in fact, she had a feeling his next words were going to be quite important. "I have seen the full spectrum of her emotions, but never had I seen what I saw yesterday. Even when it comes to young Mr Haynes. I know that Serena felt a little obligation towards Jason; however when it comes to you she is not at all obliged, her concern and actions all come from a place of love. Please remember that."

"I will. I don't know what I would do without her. I need to appreciate her more."

They both nodded and finished their drinks in silence, not an issue to either of them as they were both of the mind not to speak unless there was something worth saying.

Hanssen took a sip of his tea and wore a pensive expression, "Before I leave you Ms Wolfe, may I ask something?"

"Of Course."

"Have you heard of the expression 'mindfulness', has this been mentioned to you recently." He was obviously referring to her counselling but did not want to say it directly.

"Yes, I did wonder if it was a load of old boll… mumbo jumbo." Bernie remembered to measure her response to the CEO.

"Well on the face of it, it would come across as 'mumbo jumbo', especially when it is endorsed by people like the Kardashians.'"

Bernie was surprised that he knew of the Kardashian's, she did because of the garbage that Charlotte watched on TV in the brief spell of domestic bliss. How Hanssen was aware of them she did not know.

"I can actually confirm that mindfulness is a useful tool to have in one's arsenal. I hear that you like to run Ms Wolfe."

Bernie shot a look thinking that he was referring to her running to Kiev. Cheek of the man, he was the one who gave her the option in the first place.

Henrik could see Bernie had misunderstood his words and elaborated, "By that I mean you like to take a run to exercise."

"Yes."

"When you run, what do you do whilst you run?"

Bernie shrugged and shook her head, pulling a face, "I don't know, I suppose I run to clear my head."

"And you feel better afterwards?"

"Generally, yes."

"Mindfulness, Ms Wolfe, mindfulness."

"Not mumbo jumbo then?"

"No, certainly not. Mr Griffin embraces his inner Cassius Clay." He pushes his glasses up his nose recalling the punch he received from Rik that day, "Mr Levy seems intent on dragging Doctor Copeland on jogs around hospital grounds." He rolled his eyes, "and I like to play unusual musical instruments. Have you heard of the theremin?"

Bernie laughed and tipped her head, "No."

"It is my current project. You must come to see it once I have mastered the art of being a thereminist."

"I'll hold you to that Mr Hanssen."

As he stood gracefully, "On that note," He paused and smiled at his own pun, "I shall take my leave. I imagine that you will need to be heading back too."

"Ah yes, reality beckons."

She stood and waited until Hanssen had left before heading to the stairs.


	39. Chapter 42

Bernie for one was glad to be going home, and by home she meant Serena's place. They pulled in the drive and Jason went to open the front door. Bernie made to leave the car, as she did Serena grabbed her wrist, "Awful quiet there Major, are you OK?"

"Ah, yes, I am."

"You still got a bad head?"

"Only a little. Has eased off a lot. Would you mind if I went for a run in a min. I might run to the flat to collect my car?"

"Yes darling, no problem. You have a while before we eat." Serena leaned in to give Bernie a tender kiss.

Jason popped his head out of the front too, "Are you both staying in the car, or coming inside?"

Serena rolled her eyes and got out, followed by Bernie. "We are coming now Jason." He beamed and went inside.

At the bottom of the stairs Bernie reached out for Serena's hand, "I'm going to change and head off for that run. I won't be long."

"Take your time darling, you and I can eat when you are ready; his lordship can eat his in front of the telly at the usual time."

"Thank you my love."

She bounced upstairs as Serena made a start on lasagne. She was chopping up and prepping as Bernie came down and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. She wrapped her arms around Serena, as she so liked to do when Serena was cooking.

"Now Major, you need to get running otherwise I might find myself sending Jason down to the chippy so that I can concentrate on other things." She carried on chopping up, trying to hide how much Bernie was driving her to distraction.

"Spoilsport." She joked as she kissed Serena's cheek and left her to the cooking.

Bernie enjoyed her run, Henrik was right, running probably count as mindfulness. When she thought of 'mindfulness' things like meditation came to mind. She was not in for all of that hokey shit. Listening to ocean waves and feeling the calm wash over you. She much preferred listening to Fleetwood Mac. She ran at a decent pace, letting the brusque air run through her senses.

Her head was definitely clearer.

As she got to the flat she did not even bother going in, there was nothing in there she needed. She went straight to the car, feeling desperate to get back to Serena and Jason. Everything she needed was right there.

She strolled into a house full of warm smells. Serena's cooking was always fantastic but she did particularly love the lasagne. As Serena always made extra she knew that she had lunch for tomorrow sorted too. Everyone on AAU knew that Bernie was eating better since she shacked up with Serena.

Serena was sitting at the table with a glass of wine poured for the two of them. "Hello you, good run." Serena smiled kindly at Bernie.

"Yes, clear head now."

"Good good."

Bernie came round to Serena and offered her hand to pull Serena up to her. "Quick smooch and then is it OK if I have a shower."

"Course, we can eat after." Serena leaned into the kiss. Bernie was not joking when she said a quick smooch. It literally was a planted kiss, slightly more than a peck actually. It concerned Serena a little that the kiss seemed empty, devoid of emotion. She had been the recipient of many of those kinds of kisses with Edward. Serena tried to hide her disappointment but Bernie saw a flicker of it on Serena face as they separated.

She dismissed it but said "You don't want kisses from me in sweaty state darling, let me freshen up for you."

She headed up before Serena could reply. Serena could not help but feel a little concerned. Bernie seemed a little distant, cold today. But then last night, well… indescribable feeling. Serena reminded herself that Bernie was going through a tough time emotionally, addressing issues that she had gotten used to supressing. Serena had no idea what Bernie was going through and was not willing to ask Bernie outright, she just had to wait for her to open up and offer the information. _Patience is a virtue Campbell._

Serena checked on Jason, he was perfectly happy watching the TV, so she went upstairs to check on Bernie. Not that she wished to suffocate her but she had a feeling Bernie was distant.

She knocked on the bedroom door, _why the fuck am I knocking on my bedroom._ She entered a little tentatively. "Bernie."

Bernie was dressing and turned around. "Hey gorgeous. I was just on my way down." She smiled at Serena, maybe she was being paranoid but Serena did not think the smile reached her eyes. "Come here." Bernie wrapped Serena in a hug. "I'm sorry."

Serena looked up. "What on earth for?"

"I suppose this is an advanced sorry, I'm just a bit all over the place at the moment and I am probably going to be a bit of a pain in the arse to figure out; because I have no idea."

Serena stroked her face, "Darling, I'm here; and I don't care if you are a pain in the arse, because you are my 'pain in the arse'. OK."

Bernie nodded.

"Just promise me one thing."

Bernie looked at her, as if to say, 'Don't ask too much of me.'

Serena could read her like a book, "Don't worry not going to ask you to open up or to tell me about how you're feeling…. Just no running. Please don't run from me, from us. Jason and I are here for you."

A soft tear ran down Bernie's face. "No running." She held Serena for dear life, "I promise, you are stuck with me now. Warts and all."

"Good, now let's go and eat shall we, then we can maybe watch a film or something."

"That would be lovely."

After they had eaten, and boy had Bernie eaten, they settled on the sofa as Jason scrolled through the films on Amazon Prime. Serena watched as he searched quickly, "Jason darling, please can we have something light and funny. Not too taxing on the brain."

He beamed and changed the search criteria to comedies. Bernie was snuggled up to Serena, content and safe. _Jesus how could I ever run from this?_

Jason had selected a film and Bernie nudged Serena and raised her eyebrows and directed her eyes to the film on the screen. Serena rolled her eyes, she had not seen the film before nor did it seem like her kind of thing but judging from Bernie's look 'Kevin and Perry Go Large' was not a Jason appropriate film. Serena gave Bernie a look as if to say she understood and then waited. Jason always asked when he selected a film, it was the one condition she had. Obviously she had set certain parameters on Amazon, but they did not have a Jason filter. She was thankful that Bernie was there to give her the heads up as otherwise she would have nodded and half watched the film. She would have to remember to ask Bernie what the film was about when they were alone.

"How about this one Auntie Serena, Bernie?"

"Ah, no. Pick something else please Jason."

"Why?" Jason asked with genuine interest, not at all sulky or affronted.

Serena did not have an answer, she looked at Bernie. "Bern?"

"Um, well ah, it's a bit…." _Christ this was worse than explaining to a kid because he was not a kid. He was an intelligent and rather unique man. A man who might get ideas._ "It's a bit naughty in parts Jason."

"Naughty in what way Bernie?" Serena was sitting pissing herself, it was usually her who had to struggle with this, it was nice to see someone else having to endure the questioning.

"Ah, um, it contains sex and stuff."

"Oh, yes I don't want to watch that." Jason screwed up his face and handed the remote to Bernie, "Why don't you pick something Bernie?"

Bernie took the remote and held it for a minute,

"Bernie are you OK?" Jason looked perplexed.

"Oh, ah yes Jason." She was not used to being couch commander, it was an unusual feeling. "This is not my home so you pick."

Jason looked genuinely confused, "This is your home Bernie." He beamed. Bernie settled further into Serena and picked 'You've Got Mail'.

At that moment Serena could not be more proud of Jason.


	40. Chapter 43

Serena liked the fact that Bernie was cuddled up to her, usually it was the other way around. Serena always felt protected by her big macho army medic, but it was nice for the roles to be switched; for Bernie to feel protected by Serena. Serena slipped her arm around the small of Bernie's back and her hand went under her top so she had direct contact with Bernie's skin. Luckily Bernie was not as ticklish as Serena and so this action went unnoticed by Jason.

The film started and Jason decided he was going up to play on his computer.

"Goodnight Auntie Serena, goodnight Bernie."  
"Goodnight Jason," They said in unison.

Serena smiled at Bernie, "Good choice of film darling, I did not really have you down as a romantic."

"Full of surprises me." Bernie flashed a smile.

She really did love this film, she had seen it dozens of times; not being someone that had previously had a lot of time for films that was a bold admission. She liked the idea of snuggling down with Serena to watch soppy films.

She put her hand under Serena's top to run her hands over her stomach. _Two can play at that game!_

They sat and watched the film, neither realised as they watched the film that their hands were wandering further; Serena was now rolling her fingers along the waistband of Bernie's trousers. Bernie was rubbing Serena's breast over her bra.

Serena's breath hitched, she could not even concentrate on the film; she too had seen it more times than she cared admit, so she allowed her mind to wander along with her hands. Serena put down her wine glass on the table to the side. Her hand now free to explore more of Bernie.

Before Serena could decide what she wanted to do Bernie had repositioned herself and was now straddling Serena. "I'm sorry, you have me a bit worked up Ms Campbell."

Serena smiled, she caught Bernie's lips in an intense kiss, "Glad it isn't just me."  
"I'm surprised I lasted as long as I did to be honest." She rolled her hips into Serena. Bernie went into a tenderer kiss working her hands under Serena's clothes. "I'm sorry I was a bit distant earlier. Hopefully I can make up for it now."

She pulled Serena down the sofa a little so that she was lying flat beneath Bernie. "Um, are we OK here?" Bernie checked, "Um, Jason."

Serena laughed, "Yes, he will not come down now. The advantage of his little quirks regards the routine." She smiled and kissed Bernie, "Plus why do you think I never had the squeaky stair fixed?"

They both giggled, "Let's just keep the noise and the nakedness to a minimum eh?" Serena added.

Bernie ground her body against Serena's, "I like the challenge."

Serena placed her hands under Bernie's waistband and cupped Bernie's tight arse encouraging Bernie's rhythmic grinding. Bernie undid the button and zip on her jeans to allow Serena easier access; her jeans were tight.

"Thanks." Serena said breathlessly. She squeezed Bernie's bum and laughed.

"Bernie brushed Serena's face with her fingers, "Question."

"Yes?"

"Do you like this?" Bernie asked giving a look as if to gesture that they were doing.

"What?"

"Foreplay, 'fooling about'."

"God yes, you know I do." Bernie smiled.

"Good, it's my favourite."

Serena smiled, "Me too. It makes me feel…"

"What?"

"I dunno, because before you I had not been made to feel like this. I wish I'd met you years ago."

Bernie ran her hands down Serena's sides, "Things happen for a reason and we were meant to meet now. And I for one am not going to waste a moment." She resumed her grinding and undid the button on Serena's trousers. She slid her hand into Serena's pants. "Good god."

"You can call me Serena." She laughed as she breathed heavily. Still in awe at how her body responded to Bernie's touch.

Bernie's finger tickled at Serena's clit. Should they get interrupted it would be fairly easy to break their current stance and pretend to be fairly normal.

Serena started to moan as she moved her hand around from Bernie's arse to find her wet arousal. Bernie gave out a low but loud moan, Serena kissed her to swallow up the sound, as not to disturb Jason.

They were now working each other to climax as their bodies moved in tandem. Serena could feel herself coming. "Woah, Major, wow." She whispered as he body shook involuntarily. It was the fact that Serena reacted to her touch in that way that tipped her over the edge. She leaned her head on Serena's chest.

They looked across at the film still playing on the TV, "So how come you love this film so much?" Serena was genuinely interested.

"Dunno, just do. It gets me every time, even though I know the ending. Plus I love the music of Harry Nilsson. I think it shows love can spring from anywhere."

"That's quite profound."

"But true, right?" Bernie making a reference to the two of them.

"True story." They settled to watch the remainder of the film and it was not lost on Serena that Bernie got goose bumps at the end of the film when Meg Ryan realises that the mystery man was Tom Hanks all along, she could swear she saw Bernie wipe away a tear.


	41. Chapter 44

The next week or so passed in a blur, a blur of contentment. Bernie, as yet, had not returned to the flat and to all intents and purposes was now living at Serena's, although they never actually said this. Serena was quite happy with the situation and did not wish to rock the boat by defining this stage of their relationship.

Bernie and Jason's relationship was great too. It turned out that Bernie was a great buffer between Jason and Serena and truth be told Jason looked forward to the evenings when he and Bernie could hang out while Auntie Serena was on a late. Secretly Auntie Serena liked those evenings too as she got a break and knew Jason was in good hands.

Bernie was sitting on the bed waiting for Serena to get in from work. She was reading the book Serena had bought her last week. It was about army medics in the First World War and it was fascinating. When Bernie had queried why Serena had bought her the book the response was, "Just because; do I need a reason?" Bernie shook her head. She was not used to this kind of treatment.

The door opened, "Hello you," Serena said with a peck to Bernie's cheek. "Enjoying your book?"

Bernie beamed and folded the corner on the page of the book. "Hello yourself, the book is very interesting. How was your evening?"

Serena was now in the en suite removing her makeup and getting changed. "It dragged, glad to be home. How was your evening, was Jason OK?" Serena knew that Bernie had been another one of her sessions today, but did not want to directly ask about that. She would let Bernie raise it if she wanted to.

"Oh yes, we had a lovely evening, we had the pie you made; and then we went bowling."

Serena popped her head around the door, "Bowling?"

"Yeah, Jason dropped a not so discreet hint that there is an online deal on Thursdays."

"Ah, plus he knows I'm absolutely terrible at bowling and figured you might be more of a challenge?" She queried, knowing this to be the case. Serena let her mind wander as she pictured Bernie bowling in her tight jeans. Serena thought she might like to go next time, even if it was to spectate.

Bernie laughed, "Ha, he did say that if you were with us we would have to have the bumpers up!"

Serena disappeared back into the bathroom, "So, did you win then Major?"

"I won the first one, Jason upped his game for the last two, made sure I knew my place."

Serena entered the bedroom in her silk nightdress, it always took Bernie's breath away, "HA, a firm second, yes?"

Bernie nodded and patted her knee, "Come sit darling." She held out her hand for Serena to take so that she could assume a position straddling Bernie with her legs wrapped around Bernie's back. They were sitting face to face, in very close proximity.

Serena wrapped her arms around Bernie's neck, "Everything alright?" She hoped it did not come off as worried.

"Yes, my love; I just wanted to talk to you."

Serena tried not to react in surprise, Bernie wanted to talk; not only that but she had positioned them so that they were close and eye contact was unavoidable really.

"I'm all ears."

Bernie had her hands on Serena's hips, under her night dress. She was drawing little patterns on Serena's skin with her thumbs.

"I, um, I want to ask something of you; a favour. No, um request."

Serena bought her left hand to rub the top Bernie's arm, "Anything, take your time."

"Ah, well I know you avoid touching my scars. You have since that first time that I….." She let the sentence hang.

Serena smiled encouragingly, to reassure Bernie that she understood and was still listening.

"Well I'd like to ask you not to. That is, um, there is no need for you to make that conscious effort to avoid touching me in certain places. OK? If it is that during our intimacy that you touch or kiss my scars then that is, its fine." Bernie exhaled hoping that she had expressed herself well enough.

Serena stroked Bernie's face, "I just don't want to hurt you physically…. Or otherwise." Serena wanted to say 'emotionally' but settled on a broader definition.

There was a pause as Bernie considered what she was going to say.

"You won't Serena. The scar from the IED has healed well, it does not hurt, it is a little sensitive; but not in a bad way. The rest of my scars are so old, I forget some of them are even there now darling, but they are part of who I am now; so it is OK sometimes to be reminded that they are there."

Serena realised that this was Bernie's way of granting permission to her, saying she can pay attention to her body in every way; even those scars she is not proud of.

"But what if, I, um, what if like last time?" Serena bumbled out.

Bernie wrapped her arms tighter around Serena's waist and pulled her closer, if it was possible. "Well I'm getting better. The dreams and waking up have decreased significantly, that is not unrelated to you. It has improved considerably since I got back."

Serena did not ask for confirmation but knew that Bernie was referring to the return from Kiev rather than the return from her last tour. She would not push Bernie to talk about her time in the Ukraine, she knew it had taken its toll on her given her drawn look and weight loss. Serena had seen it the second she had clocked her on the ward.

"Yes, I know darling. I'm glad that you think that I help."

Bernie pulled her into a hug, "There is no 'think' about it. You do help, immensely."

They never really discussed this, even on the occasions that Serena had woken up to find Bernie sweating and restless, talking in her sleep to the people in her dreams who would not answer. On occasion Serena had woken to find Bernie asleep in the chair, she will have woken in the night and removed herself from the bed to protect Serena from harm should she lash out in her sleep. She could have taken the spare room, but nowhere felt as safe as when she was with Serena; so back be damned she had slept in the armchair more than once.

Bernie came out of the hug and resumed eye contact, "Let's just see eh. All I am saying is that I do not want to shut off any part of myself to you. I am learning to handle my emotions better now. That day you kissed my scars I am certain that was not the cause of my disturbance; a mere coincidence, or a tiny contributing factor. We were going through a very emotional time; well I know I was darling."

Serena placed her hand on Bernie's top where the IED scar lay underneath. Bernie leaned forward and caught Serena's top lip between her lips and held the chaste kiss for a time as she felt a tear roll down a her cheek. She could also feel that Serena was also silent crying. Bernie pulled Serena into a hug, breathing deeply in relief that she had not fucked this particular moment up. She had managed to open up, talk coherently and Serena had understood.

"Now in the spirit of honesty," Bernie looked at Serena, "Is there anything else you want to ask about me, or anything you want to tell me? I, I like this feeling… getting to know each other inside and out."

 _Finally, she bloody gets it!_ Serena pondered as there was something she wanted to say, something sitting in the back of her mind; whether this was the right time to mention it was another matter. She pulled Bernie into a kiss to give her time to decide whether to broach the subject now given that the opportunity had been presented to her on a plate.


	42. Chapter 45

Afternoon Berena fans. Sitting in the garden writing an update instead of moving the lawn. Sorry for the amount of smut right now (#sorrynotsorry) I can only see the next chapter being worse should be public desire it.

This is M rated so just make sure you are not having afternoon tea with your mother when you read this. xx

chapter 45

Serena looked at Bernie, she would be a bit of a hypocrite if she did not take a chance to reciprocate this open discussion between the two of them.

She let out a breath and Bernie suddenly looked worried. Serena grabbed Bernie's face with both of her hands. "There is nothing to worry about between us darling. I can honestly say this is the best I have ever felt in a relationship. You make me feel amazing. I just wanted to check something with you."

"You make me feel amazing too Serena, I am a different person now and that is because of you." Bernie confirmed, just in case this was the thing Serena was wishing to check.

Serena kissed Bernie, "Good, I'm glad you feel the same, but it is something else I wish to check with you. It might just be me being stupid, still finding my confidence after a lifetime of having it bashed in the bedroom."

"Nothing you could ever say to me could be stupid. If I can help I will OK?" Bernie knew that despite her flirtatious confident exterior and her high sex drive; well at least with Bernie, she did not know about with previous lovers; Serena still had confidence issues at times. Probably stemmed from Edward being an absolute bastard to her, or the way that Robbie treated her like a sex object; to pick up and pick put down as and when he fancied.

Serena relaxed a little. "So firstly I Love what we have Bernie, and I know I can be rather insatiable when it comes to you. I just wanted to check that it's not too much for you. I don't want our sex to become a chore to keep me satisfied."

Bernie listened intently, Serena really was worried about this she could tell. It wasn't a problem to Bernie, she liked it very much she just needed to make sure Serena knew this. She moved her right hand from Serena's hip to the inside of her leg and gently stroked near to her knickers, "Honestly not a problem for me. I've had a lifetime of intermittent marriage sex and more recently tawdry knee trembles in hidden corners. With you I have had a sexual awakening and quite frankly I really do not think there is such a thing as 'too much sex' now I have you." She leaned in to kiss Serena hard and deep as her hand squeezed at the wet patch on Serena's knickers. "As long as I have the desired effect on you," She winked, "I can't see us having a problem."

Serena was breathing heavily, Bernie would always have that effect on her; "Christ Bernie I can never see a time when you don't have that effect on me. Even seeing you in your scrubs gives me fizzy knickers."

Bernie burst into a loud laugh and threw her head back, "Fizzy knickers!" she had never heard that expression before and it was funnier that the sight of her in scrubs did that, made her laugh because quite frankly Bernie always has to control herself when Serena wandered around AAU in her light blues.

"So, is that all that was worrying you; that I wouldn't be able to keep up with your gargantuan libido?"

Serena giggled, gargantuan did not even cover it, but it would do, "Yes… well, kind of."

"Go on, you've started so you may as well finish." Bernie chucked at how mastermind must have infiltrated her brain. _Thanks Jason!_

"OK so I know I have mentioned this before and you have reassured me, but cards on the table time, be totally honest Bernie because it sill worrie…"

Before she could finish her sentence Bernie cut in knowing exactly what was coming, "Serena, you are not, I repeat not, a selfish lover. I think you have to look at it like this," Bernie moved her hands from Serena's pants and placed it back on her hips so that Serena would concentrate on what she was about to say, "We make a good fit OK. We are still experimenting and discovering new things about each other right?"

"Yes"

"And part of that is discovering what we like and don't like and the roles we play, yes?"

Serena nodded knowing Bernie had more to say. For a more reserved person to the world she was definitely the more confident of the two of them in this arena.

"So you will have realised that I love to make love to you, to satisfy you. I get off on that. You love to be satisfied, that gets you off. We are a good fit. Conversely we do switch and you give and I receive, there are no set rules; also very much something we love. We enjoy making love together. If it were you lay there like a sack of potatoes while I did all the hard work to try and satisfy one or both of us then this would be a valid conversation. Does that make sense?"

"Perfect sense. Thank you darling, I told you I was being stupid."

"No never stupid, it would have been stupid for you to let it fester and potentially cause issues later because I know how you worry. Remember this is a learning curve for us both. Sometimes we might not get it right, or we might find we don't like certain things, but don't let it worry you OK. Here," She motioned around the room, "Is a place where we leave worry at the door, this is our sanctuary."

Serena kissed Bernie in grateful thanks.

"Now, all this talk of sex has got me wanting to do some more learning about my delicious girlfriend." She ran her hands up Serena's sides as she lifted her night dress up and pulled it off. Perky breasts were now in her eyeline, "Now, I'm that hyped up I am going to let you pick what we do, what does the lady desire?"

Serena removed Bernie's top, looked at Bernie with a finger held to her lip as if she was thinking, "I'd like to try something new, when I read about it they said it's better if you are both really aroused."

Bernie smiled, "I'm listening!"


	43. Chapter 46

Author note: Hi Berena-kins.

Sorry this is short and sweet (well not sweet, just very, very, naughty)

I am a very filthy minded young lady and should be punished (I wish), I'm living vicariously through my Berena fics!

Anyway kids enjoy a bit of naughtyness. Thank me later.

chapter 46

"Well I think that sounds like it could be fun. It's a new one for me, how about you."

"Ha Edward would not indulge in anything that required work on his part, and as for the others; never really felt it was something I would try with just anyone." Serena confirmed.

"But you want to try it with me?" She gave Serena's side a playful squeeze.

Serena winked, "If you're up for it, yes." She kissed Bernie moving her tongue inside her mouth and played with Bernie's nipples to ensure that she remained suitably turned on.

"Well the only thing you need to decide is top or bottom," She mumbled as Serena kissed her.

Serena looked her "Bottom please, let's face it we can always try it the other way around next time."

"That's the spirit sexy arse." Bernie laughed as they untangled themselves and Serena lay on the duvet as Bernie turned around straddling Serena's head and then leaning forward over Serena's body, her hands gripping Serena's raised knees as she maintained her strength to lower her face to Serena's throbbing core. Her grip on Serena's knees nearly faltered as she felt Serena's mouth on her clit, "Woah, are you starting without me Ms Campbell?"

"Sorry, I got a bit excited." She giggled, "Are you the six and me the nine or the other way around?"

Bernie laughed, "Not sure. I doubt we look like the diagrams in Cosmo though."

Serena was kissing and licking at Bernie's inner thighs not paying any regard to avoiding Bernie's scars; to be fair she would not have been able to avoid them at this angle, even if she had wanted to. Bernie was responding well to these touches, maybe this would be OK.

Serena laughed, that is exactly where she had got her new found knowledge of interesting sex positions.

Bernie pushed Serena's knees further apart to get where she needed to be, she let out a breath on Serena's core and kissed her public area. Serena took this as a green light as she started to lap at Bernie's labia, all the more fun as Bernie was moving and grinding into her tongue. She could feel Bernie making patterns over and around her clit. Any moans and noises were lost as they continued to work on each other with gusto. The purrs and moans vibrated through them both and they found a rhythm that they both fell into.

Bernie could feel her orgasm building as Serena stepped up things a notch, her fingers digging into the front of Bernie's thighs. She kind of enjoyed the feeling. _Pleasure and pain, that's a new feeling!_

Bernie inserted 2 fingers into Serena and pressed thrusted deep and slow as she rested her tongue and concentrated on her own impending orgasm.

Serena could feel the intensity from pleasuring Bernie, she could feel that Bernie was probably going to come any time. She pushed inside of Bernie and pressed hard on her G spot as she could feel a gush of fluid. Bernie nearly collapsed onto Serena as she not only orgasmed but ejaculated hard. _Wow that was intense. Serena a selfish lover, my arse!_ Bernie knew in her 30 plus years of sexual activity that this was something else. She had never ejaculated for anyone before, she certainly knew that's what it was as she was 100% certain, as a medical professional, that she had not just pissed herself mid orgasm. Plus Serena seemed to be enjoying the aftermath of her explosion, so much so that Bernie felt Serena's muscles tighten as she came hard and loud. _A little too loud for 1am probably._

Bernie kissed Serena's thighs as she slipped down slightly so that her body was resting flushly on Serena's for a minute while she regained control of her muscles. She flipped on to her back so that effectively they were now top and tails on the bed. She could see the rise and fall of Serena's chest. "Darling are you OK?"

"Jesus, yes; that was intense wasn't it?"

"Mmmmm. Sorry about the er… "Bernie said apologetically.

Serena laughed, "Are you joking that was amazing, has that ever happened before?"

"No." Bernie admitted.

"Well I must be doing something right then eh?"

"I did tell you that you are not a selfish lover, is that proof enough?"

"Yeah, that will do. Dunno about you but I was worried I had wet myself when it happened to me that time at yours. Thought the menopause might be reminding me I am too old to be bonking like a teenager."

They both laughed as they regained their composure.

"I know it's late but I feel like a shower, is that OK?" Bernie asked.

Serena waved her arm as if to gesture 'go ahead' as she lay her head back and took in breaths.

Bernie got up from the bed and headed to the bathroom.

She suddenly turned around and reached for Serena's hand, "Are you coming or what?"

Serena did not need asking twice as she rolled off the bed with the promise of a hot sexy shower.


	44. Chapter 47

They were sat at the breakfast table drinking coffee and eating toast, laughing and joking; good moods all around. That was until Jason came into the kitchen, his face very much wearing a frown.

"Are you OK Jason?" Serena asked.

"No Auntie Serena, I am very tired actually."

Serena looked at Bernie and pulled her face, she could hazard a guess at what was coming next, she could feel her face going red.

"Yes, I didn't get much sleep last night. You and Bernie were very noisy. Bernie was laughing a lot and I know you had the shower running because I could hear it in my room. What a silly time to have a shower."

"Ah sorry Jason, Bernie and I stayed up talking and then I decided I wanted a shower before we went to bed, next time we will be quiet."

Jason looked at her cynically, "You said that last time."

Bernie was laughing behind her coffee cup. Serena kicked her under the table. Jason had not mentioned how noisy Serena was but they both knew that if Jason had heard the laughing and the shower; he definitely heard other things too.

"Do you need a lift anywhere before we go to work?" She directed to Jason.

Before he could answer Serena's phone rung, _Beyonce ringone; Elinor._ "Hello my darling how are you?"

Elinor started talking at the usual rushed pace, Serena nodding at the right places.

"Oh yes, I forgot that was tomorrow; yes I will be there."

More talking from Elinor.

"I will ask her now darling, give me a second." Serena put her hand over the phone and looked at Bernie, "Sorry I forgot," She whispered loudly, "Elinor has an am dram show on Saturday, she wants us to go and meet her for dinner after. Do you want to come?" She smiled at Bernie, she lowered her voice, "You don't have to if you don't…."

Bernie did not let her finish, "I would love to."

"Bernie is coming too darling." Serena was pleased that Elinor invited Bernie, the whole thing would be far more enjoyable with Bernie by her side.

Elinor carried on talking and when she paused for breath Serena cut in, "OK, OK, so 2.30 pm tomorrow, tickets at the box office, wait in the bar for you afterwards. Got it. See you then. I am going to have to go, work beckons."

With that she put the phone down.

She reached for Bernie's hand and gave it a squeeze.

"I'm sorry about that Jason, do you need a list anywhere."

"No thank you Auntie Serena, I am meeting Celia today." His face lit up. Serena was so happy to see that he was so happy with Celia; despite the awkward start and her first meeting with Celia, that being in the AAU with railings in her side; all seemed well with them. Celia's family were equally pleased and supportive.

"Good, good. Ellie tells me she asked you to come on Saturday to her show but you said no, how come? Too cool to be seen in public with me?" She laughed.

"No, it's not that. She told me the show is called Cats, and I don't like cats; allergic in fact, so I said I couldn't possibly go."

He turned around to go back to his room to fetch his rucksack.

Bernie turned to Serena, "I've not seen Cats, but he does know they are not real cats right?"

"No idea, not really wanting to broach that subject; not sure how that would go."

They laughed and got up to go to work.

They had decided to get the train to the theatre, as it was easier to do that than to drive and park, plus it meant that they could indulge in a nice shiraz or three.

They walked into the theatre, the foyer and bar were light and modern as they were a build on to the existing theatre. Serena had been several times before to see Elinor in various productions. They both had a fondness for the theatre. Bernie, on the other hand, had admitted on the train that the only time she had been the theatre was to take the kids to a couple of pantomimes when they were young; effectively she was a theatre virgin, she had been sure to show interest in this though as she knew it was important to Serena and Elinor. You never know she might even like it.

Serena went to the box office to collect the tickets. Bernie watched as she so elegantly sashayed to the desk. She was wearing a black dress, that hugged in all the right places; she had a burgundy pashmina and matching killer heels. Bernie thought she was sex on legs and had to maintain her best resolve not to grab her into an embrace and kiss the hell out of her. They were still working on their public displays of affection. They maintained their flirtatious to and fro's and they had always been tactile, even before they had got together; but this was also mainly within the hospital. Outside of the hospital they had held hands on occasion and acted a little more as a couple in restaurants that was about the limit. No public kissing or embracing. That would probably come in time.

Serena made her way back to Bernie, "Tickets sorted, drinks?"

"Yes, good idea."

As they turned to go to the bar Serena suddenly froze, "Shit!"

Bernie turned to Serena, "What, what is it Serena?"

Bernie directed her gaze to where Serena was staring; there was a man in his late 40's, attractive in the right light, but most certainly drunk; with a woman in her 20's draped around him. Bernie did not have to be a Sherlock Holmes to guess that it was Serena's ex-husband and his new wife. Bernie was secretly cursing Elinor as she obviously had not told Serena that Edward and Liberty would be here.

Serena was muttering under her breath, "Fancy not telling me she invited her father and the toddler for fucks sake."

Bernie gave Serena an understanding smile, "Calm down Serena, let's just go get our drinks and find our seats, chances are they are so busy practically fornicating on the bar that they won't notice us."

"You go to the bar, I'll stay here." Serena said as her confidence seemed to slip away and the gorgeous woman before Bernie was transforming into someone Bernie had not seen before. She had to rescue her Serena, if Edward and Liberty did see them she wanted them to see her Serena. The sexy, gorgeous, confident, sassy Serena.

"No, you know my rule about not leaving a man behind, we are doing this together. They will see you and he will wonder what he let go of and she will envy you like hell. You are stunning and I feel honoured to be here with you, so let's show them eh." She nudged Serena's chin with her finger and gave her a reassuring look. This seemed to spur Serena on, she grabbed Bernie's hand and they walked to the bar hand in hand.

There were a few people between the two Campbell camps at the bar. Serena was trying to hide her annoyance that Ellie had not given her a heads up. It's a good thing that she was proud enough of her daughter to appreciate that she would want both of her parents there. She was bloody surprised that Edward had turned up, granted he was drunk, but he was there.

She also congratulated herself on the fact that she looked stunning, if she did say so herself. She fitted in her LBD quite well and she knew that Bernie loved it when she wore her killer heels.

As they ordered drinks and a bottle for the interval Bernie went to pay as they heard a piercing scream, "Eeeeekkk 'Rina, you are here! Hugs!" Liberty was hugging Serena before she had chance to even acknowledge her. "Eddie, Eddie; it's Serena."

"So I see," Edward said with a slur. "You look well Serena." He said obviously taking in an eyeful.

Bernie handed a glass to Serena, "Edward, Liberty. Lovely to see you both." Serena said graciously.

"Oh god Serena, don't tell me," Liberty said excitedly waving her hands a little too enthusiastically, "This is Ber-nie." She said in a sing songy voice making emphasis on the two syllables of Bernie's name tipping her head left and then right." _Jesus this is what happens when you feed champagne to a minor._ Serena thought.

Bernie leaned forward to shake Liberty's hand, she pulled Bernie into a hug. "So you are the famous Bernie, the one making 'Rina happy." Bernie nodded her head up as she was speechless. Edward held out hand, "Good luck to you," He said in just above a whisper so that Serena could not hear. He could already see her scowling. "Remember when she gets all angry just 'feed the beast' as it were- Shiraz always used to work." He winked. _What an absolute prick._ Bernie tightened her grip on his hand and gave a look as if to say, 'You have been warned, say anything else like that and….'

Edward retreated knowing that he and Serena's girlfriend were not on the same page, at all.

The bell sounded for 5 minutes until curtain up. Serena, much relieved, grabbed Bernie's hand and made for the theatre knowing that they would not have to suffer this pair of cretins for much longer.

They sat in their seats in relief looking forward to the performance. Elinor was playing Jemima, so she had some singing to do. Serena was bursting with pride waiting for the curtain to lift having forgot all about that dickhead and his dizzy new wife.

That was until the curtain was up and the lights were down and suddenly their row was being disturbed by later comers who were going to take the two vacant seats next to Serena. Serena looked up and rolled her eyes as Edward plonked himself down next to her and asked quite loudly, "Haven't missed anything have I 'Rena."

Serena felt Bernie's hand grasp for hers on her knee and she felt with Bernie there she could even manage to survive this torture.


	45. Chapter 48

Serena was mesmerised with the show. Maybe she was a little bias but this was a really good production. The costumes were brilliant and the atmosphere was brilliant. She sang along to all of the songs as she rested hers and Bernie's connected hands on her lap, not making an effort to hide this from Edward. Bernie was mesmerised with Serena, she was in her element. Serena had totally forgotten that Edward was sitting next to her; Bernie hadn't though. She noticed that he was shuffling uncomfortably, especially since his drink had ran out and he kept checking his watch to see when the interval was. _That inconsiderate twit will probably leave 5 minutes before the end of the first half to be first to the bar._ When he wasn't clock watching he was either squinting at the stage trying to work out which character his daughter was, or he was glancing down at Serena's lap where their hands were interlinked.

As predicted Edward and Liberty were first up and out at the interval. Bernie and Serena were in less of a rush. Bernie went to fetch the pre ordered drinks and found a table as Serena went to the ladies.

Bernie picked a small table with 2 chairs hoping that Edward and Liberty would not join them once they had their drinks. She poured the wine and waited for Serena to reappear. She really could pick her out of a crowd in a room. Serena was stunning. She took her seat and raised a toast with her glass. "Here's to breaking your theatre virginity Major." They clinked glasses and laughed. "Are you enjoying it?"

"Very much so, it's so," She was trying to find a word, "Consuming."

"Yes, it is." She placed her hand on Bernie's thigh under the table.

Bernie could see Edward across the room, he was looking across at them, "You know Edward has not stopped looking at you the whole time."

"Really?" Serena sounded surprised.

"Yeah, he's looking now. If you turn he will look away but he is staring; and in the theatre he kept on looking at you and our hands in your lap."  
"Jealous methinks." Serena commented "According to what Ellie tells me, they spend most of their time either arguing or making up. What do you think today is?"

"Keeping up appearances darling." Bernie commented and Serena nodded in agreement. They drained their glasses and Bernie topped up their glasses to take in for the second half. Bernie stood and held out her hand to Serena for her to get up. As Serena stood, Bernie placed a kiss on her cheek just as Edward and Liberty were passing. Not that she had planned it like that, unlike Edward she had not spent the entire time watching their every move; it was just a very happy accident. Especially since Serena did not seem to mind this sweet public display of affection.

They took their seats for the second half but Bernie sat next to Edward this time. Not for any other reason than Bernie did not want Edward eying up Serena when he should be watching the show; the second half was where Elinor's character did her songs. _OK so maybe I am marking my territory a bit but that's my right. He lost Serena and he should be reminded of it._

The second half was amazing, Elinor really had a talent and you could tell she loved it. If it were possible for Serena to burst with pride she would have. Even Edward managed to pay attention and clap in the right places and generally behave. Liberty obviously was not a seasoned theatre goer and has no etiquette really, but it was easier just to ignore her.

The show seemed to end far too quickly. Serena and Bernie left the main theatre and went back to the bar where they ordered another drink, knowing that they would need to wait for Ellie so that they could go for food. Apparently Ellie had booked a really nice Thai place. _Probably knowing Mummy will pay._ Serena thought cynically.

Serena's phone went off, it was a text from Ellie.

"Hey mumsie, did you enjoy the show; are you and Bernie still coming for food? I will be out in about 20 minutes. Table is not booked until 6pm so we have bags of time. Kisses. E."

Serena was beaming, "Is that Ellie?" Bernie asked as she leaned with her back to the bar.

"Yes. Wasn't she amazing? Can you get me a glass of wine for Ellie please my love, she should be out soon enough."

Bernie smiled and turned to the bar to get another drink. Serena could not help but look Bernie up and down. She looked fabulous, she was wearing a grey tailored suit with a crisp white shirt and she was wearing heels; which made her sexy long legs even longer. Even in her killer heels Serena was still the shorter of the two of them.

Serena shot a message to Ellie. "Darling that was amazing, I think you may have converted Bernie to become a theatre goer. Just getting a drink in for you now. Hurry along can't wait to see you. Mum x"

Bernie had her drink and Ellie's drink on the bar, she turned around to rest her back on the bar and stood with her feet slightly apart. Serena was facing her taking a sip of wine as she put her phone in her bag. Bernie was feeling brave, the bar was all but empty as many patrons had now moved on, there were only a few people left in the bar; possibly waiting for one of the other actors. Bernie wrapped her arms around Serena's waist and pulled her a little closer. Serena placed her glass the other side of Bernie and responded to Bernie by wrapping her arms around Bernie neck.

"You look ravishing, did you know that?" Bernie said in a low voice.

Serena blushed, "That's what I was going for." She winked, "Did it work then?"

"Hell yes."

Serena ran her hands down the arms of Bernie's suit jacket, she loved the feel of Bernie's muscles, they were defined but discreet. The suit she was wearing just looked amazing, Serena thought it must be a made to measure suit as it just looked so good. "New suit."

It was Bernie's turn to blush, "Yeah, bit of a present to myself really."

"Bit of a present for me too Major. Is that a made to measure?"

Bernie smiled and flashed a grin, "Um, yes. I, er, used the tailor who did all of my Army dress uniforms."

Serena lifted her heels from the floor so that she was on her tip toes in her heels and planted a chaste but lingering kiss to Bernie's lips.

"You two might want to get a room."

They both turned to see Edward waving a champagne glass in their direction as Liberty stood in front of him, his hand around her waist massaging her stomach and virtually grinding into her back.

"Oh, says you, which one would you like to be Edward; the pot or the kettle. As public displays go Mr Campbell, I think you take the embarrassment crown." Serena spoke slowly and concisely, quite the opposite to her ex-husband.

"What compared to a couple of lezzer's?" Both Edward and Liberty laughed.

Serena maintained her hold on Bernie as she could feel Bernie tense up. "Ignore them darling."

As Serena was saying these words to Bernie, Elinor came out of the stage door, "For god's sake dad will you put Lib's down, it's embarrassing. And I heard what you just said to mum, just stop OK. If anyone is making a show of us it is you." She walked past her dad and Liberty over to Serena and Bernie, she shoulders sagged in relief as Bernie passed over the glass of wine, "Cheers Bernie. You still know you owe me a bottle through right?"

"Not forgotten." Bernie smiled.

"What's this?" Serena asked laughing. They were interrupted by Edward and Liberty coming over.

"El's darling, when are we going for food, I'm super hungry babes." Liberty all but whined.

Bernie, Serena and Elinor all did an inwards sigh.

Serena grabbed Elinor's arm and turned so she could whisper; not so quietly; "Elinor, please tell me that this is not a cosy table for 5?"

Elinor pulled a grimace, "Sorry Mum." She shrugged.

Serena sighed and grabbed the bridge of her nose, "You and I will be having words about this later lady."

By this point Edward was trying to get another drink from the bar before the staff pulled down the shutters.

"Mum, I am sorry I just wanted you and dad here really, which means; well you know; and I didn't want to show preferences. Sorry I just thought it might be fine. Promise you will be nice to them, just for tonight."

At the point Bernie is still leaning on the bar, watching the show that Edward and Liberty are making of themselves as Serena leans against her back against Bernie's front. Bernie had her hand on Serena's hip. Nothing as ostentatious as the show Mr and young Mrs Campbell were making of themselves.

"Listen Ellie, I promise I will play nice, if they do; but I warn you if they provoke me I will bite."

Bernie leaned in to Serena and said, so that Ellie could hear, "No you won't, they would love that; dine on it for weeks. Remain calm, it will annoy him more." Bernie winked at Ellie and Ellie mouthed 'thanks' as Serena scowled in the general direction of her ex-husband. _Lucky bloody escape there._

"Sorry excuse me." Ellie drained her glass and stalked off in the direction of Edward, "Dad, leave it, we are going for food in a min, we can get drinks then." She linked her dad on one side and Liberty on the other and looked behind to Serena and Bernie indicating that they should follow.

They linked hands and followed the other three. The pace was slow as it was obvious that Elinor was supporting Edward and Liberty to just put one foot in front of the other. They were hard to miss so Serena slowed their walking so that she could talk to Bernie.

"Are you OK darling?"

"Yes, I just don't like how Edward speaks to you."

"Oh, I'm used to it by now. I just ignore him and the embryo."

"The Embryo?"

"Liberty. You know she is only a few years older than Ellie. They actually have mutual friends from when they used to go out in town."

"HA." Bernie stopped walking for a minute to face Serena, her next words were serious, "Are you alright Serena?"

"Absolutely, I have you here with me. I am perfect."

"Listen I know that, um, in public." Bernie was faltering, her stutter always presented at the most inappropriate times, "Um, what I mean to say is if you don't want me to hold your hand or affectionate displays, just say OK; I won't be offended. I'm not trying to make a show of you, us. I just do what feels right."

Serena let go of Bernie's hand, temporarily confirming Bernie's fear, but then she put her hands to either side of Bernie's face. "This feels right, I am proud to be your girlfriend, in public. I don't care what anyone else thinks, especially him." She nods her head up the road, "Anyway I think any displays of affection have been out done by them pair; urgh." She smiled. She grabbed Bernie's hand and pulled her as she started to walk very quickly, almost into a run; "Come on, we need to catch them up, before they think we have sneaked off for a cheeky fumble."

They both laugh and run down the high street as elegantly as they can in heels.


	46. Chapter 49

It seems that the brusque walk had sobered Edward and Liberty up enough so that they could at least function to a degree; it probably would not stop them being totally inappropriate though.

They were seated at a round table in the middle of the restaurant Ellie was sat with her parents either side of her; Liberty next to Edward and Bernie next to Serena.

The waiter came to take the drinks order, Serena ordered a bottle of Shiraz for her, Bernie and Ellie. Edward asked for champagne. "Dad, don't you think you have had enough champers?"

"Nope, we are celebrating. You and your brilliant show! Annnnd, Serena and Bernie."

Liberty starts to sing the Diana Ross song, "I'm coming out, I want the world to know. Got to let it Show."

Elinor leans in, "Liberty, shhhh."

"Soz Els, I'm just pleased Rena' is finally happy. So is Eddie. I mean there had to be a reason they didn't work out right."

Bernie was stunned into silence. _What a fucking moron!_

Serena stood, "Excuse me a moment, just going to pay a visit."

Bernie looked up and mouthed 'OK?' Serena nodded and headed off to the ladies.

They looked at the menu for a few minutes and the drinks arrived, there was a distinct tension around the table. Bernie stood and excused herself to go and check on Serena.

She entered the toilets and could see Serena's heels under the only stall that was occupied. "Serena, it's me; are you OK?" She was met with silence. "I'm not leaving you here. Please talk to me."

She waited and a few minutes later the lock was undone and Bernie pushed the door open. Serena had put the loo seat down and was sitting with her head back breathing heavy fighting tears. Bernie shut the door behind her and grabbed Serena's hands to pull her to standing. "Darling, you can't hide in here. As much as you would prefer to that, it would only make them think they had been successful in getting to you." She spoke softly as she stroked Serena's hair.

"They have got to me Bernie. I know it's stupid but they do."

Bernie shook her head, "They are a pair of fucking morons; the reason you and Edward did not work out is because he was an arsehole to you and he did not know how to keep his dick in his pants. As for her, she's a vapid airhead. They are both plastered too; they are just embarrassing themselves. You should see Ellie's face. She is mortified."

She wrapped her arms around Serena's waist as Serena had her arms around Bernie's neck; this is when she felt happiest. "Thank you my love, I do feel able to go back out there and front it out, but as for Ellie she gets no sympathy from me. She is old enough to know that her dad will never change."

They exchanged a quick kiss to the lips, which turned into a couple of kisses. They suddenly heard the door go, "Mum, Bernie; are you OK?" Ellie called out. Much like Bernie had she could see that Serena was in the only occupied stall, but Bernie was standing facing her. It was quite obvious to Ellie that she had probably interrupting a snogging session. She couldn't be annoyed though at least they did not do it in public like her dad and Libs. Serena and Bernie stopped kissing and stood silently. "Hi Ellie," Bernie called out. "We will be out in a sec, your mum was a bit upset; have they piped down now?"

"Yeah, I've told them to behave." Ellie said seriously.

"OK, be there now. If the waiter is taking orders can you ask for 2 minutes and we will go up and order on our way back to the table."

Serena mouthed, 'thank you' to Bernie.

Ellie went back and Bernie stole one last quick kiss before they left the stall. Serena checked herself in the mirror, straightened herself up, fixed her hair and makeup and they headed back for round 2.

They sat down and took a sip of wine. Bernie placed her hand on Serena's thigh under the table; just to remind her she was there and together they were strong.

"Are you alright sweetie?" Liberty directed to Serena.

"Absolutely fine Liberty."

Before they could continue more awkward pleasantries the starters arrived. Edward, stupidly had ordered soup and it was quite the sight trying to watch him get more in his mouth than down the napkin that Liberty had tucked into the neck of his shirt.

Serena had ordered some Thai style prawns and Bernie had peanut chicken satay. The food was amazing, Serena saved one of her prawns for Bernie, putting it on the fork and guiding it to Bernie's mouth. Bernie laughed as she caught it in her mouth. "Wow, that's superb, I have menu envy now!" Serena smiled. Edward was staring again Bernie noticed. Thing was they were interacting as they always had and always will; they were not putting on a show. Ellie thought it was nice to see natural affection rather than the pantomime that Edward and Liberty always put on to show people how in love they were; when in actual fact they spent most of their time arguing.

Bernie managed to direct the conversation to Ellie's favourite topic; herself. She gave Ellie the bait to tell her dad about her upcoming project at the hospital. Bernie and Serena did not mind hearing about it again as it would be better than any other topic of conversation that might come up.

They received the main courses and they were as delicious as the starters. Bernie had a Thai curry and Serena had opted for a stir fry dish. They tried each other's dishes and decided they would have to come back her again to try other things. Only next time, just the three of them.

They were perusing the dessert menu as the opportunity arose for Liberty to open her stupid mouth, it was fairly certain that whatever she was going to say was going to be inappropriate and, or ridiculous. The 3 other woman braced themselves "So 'Rina, how long have you and Bernie been together?" _OK maybe not._ Serena was surprised.

"Not long, coming up for a few months, but Bernie and I have worked together for a while and I have known Bernie since she joined the hospital at the beginning of the year."

Liberty smiled, "So are you gay, gay or just gay for Bernie?"

Serena looked confused and looked at Ellie and then Bernie to check she had heard right.

Edward decided to chime in, "Lib's if she is a dyke, you better watch it she might fancy you!" He laughed, "Although, I think she would still want to fuck me more; you will always hold a candle for me won't you darlin'?" He added in a smarmy tone. Edward and Liberty laughed.

Bernie straightened up and reached into her pocket, she placed three £20 notes on the table; she held out her hand to Serena. "Come on darling, enough now. Sorry Ellie but your Mum does not deserve this."

With that Bernie guided them out with her arm around Serena's waist.

"Fucking hell, they're a bit sensitive aren't they?" Edward said not too quietly, so much so other diners were turning around.

"Oh shut up Dad. You can be a right knob when you are drunk." With that Ellie went after her mum.

They hit the fresh air of the street and Bernie turned to Serena, "I'm so sorry, I couldn't let him speak to you like that Serena."

"No need to be sorry, if you had not done that I can't guarantee I wouldn't have caused a scene."

Bernie rubbed her arm, "Ok, do you want to go somewhere else, or get the train back now?"

Before she could answer they heard Ellie calling out to them, "Mum, Bernie; wait!"

They waited, "Bloody hell Bernie, cause a scene why don't you!"

"You've got to be kidding right." Bernie said almost shouting, "I don't care that he is your dad, I am not letting him, or her for that matter" Referring to Liberty, waving her arm in the direction of the restaurant, "Talk to Serena like that."

"God Bernie, he was only joking!" Her voice now raised.

"Elinor." Serena stepped in.

"It's OK Serena," Bernie said in a more measured tone, "I think Elinor, that you and your father might want to look at what is joking. What he said was unacceptable."

Bernie grabbed Serena's hand as to walk away, but before she did she went into her pocket and pulled out a £10 note, "Here's what I owe you for that bottle of wine you won off me. Enjoy!"

With that Bernie and Serena walked off, with Bernie insisting that Serena held her nerve, head held high; walking away being the bigger person. They had absolutely nothing to be ashamed of tonight. Nothing at all.


	47. Chapter 50

Hand in hand they walked up the street. "That's it, we survived it; and to be frank we will be the only ones who do not have to feel ashamed of ourselves tomorrow." Bernie stated. "I will apologise to Ellie tomorrow for snapping at her, but this was all her doing."

"Yes, let her sweat a bit." Serena said knowing her daughter will not be having a fabulous time right now.

"It's an hour and ten until the next train, well there is one in 10 minutes but there is no way we will make that. Shall we grab a 'debrief' drink?"

"Sounds good."  
They were in the main part of town and Bernie scanned the square for a suitable bar. Nothing too busy, but somewhere with an atmosphere. She spotted a colourful wine bar with a rainbow flag at full mast, she pulled Serena in the direction of the gay bar.

They walked in and the atmosphere was nice and relaxed. Music on but not too loud; you could still have a conversation. Sofa's with low coffee tables lined the walls. The bar was not too full which Serena was thankful of. "Go and find us a seat and I'll get drinks." Bernie kissed Serena's cheek.

Serena opted for one of the sofas and not long after Bernie returned with a bottle and 2 glasses. "It was buy two glasses get the rest of the bottle free."

"Rude not to." Serena mused.

Bernie sat next to her and poured the wine. The sofa was quite cosy Serena noted and realised that there was no way they could sit without making bodily contact. Serena felt Bernie put her arm around her as she used her other hand to pick up her wine glass. "So, now we are in safety; really are you OK?" Bernie asked.

Serena looked at her, "Bernie, um, you have your arm around me."

"Yeah, and no doubt no one would bat an eyelid if I did this?" She caught Serena's bottom lip in a lingering kiss.

"Have you bought us into a gay bar?" Serena whispered.

"Yeah." Bernie answered as if it were obvious from the décor and their surroundings. "Thought it would be a safe haven from a certain bigot ex-husband and his trophy wife." _Plus I get to give my girl a proper kiss without people judging._ "So, are you OK?"  
Serena looked around, yes, now she looked it was kind of obvious that this place had a splash of the gay about it; well just like Julian Clary has a splash of the gay about him. She laughed, "I'm absolutely fine. Yes I am, was, a little upset; but sticks and stones and all that." She smiled and kissed Bernie, "thank you for being so amazing tonight. I've always wanted someone who would defend me like that. I never in a million years imagined it would be you." She giggled.

Bernie smiled, "Since I laid eyes on you I hoped against hope that one day I would be that person. Why do you think I always had your back at the hospital all those months ago?"

This was probably the thing she loved most about Bernie, the fact that she would always be there protecting her, "Everyone needs a Major in their lives protecting them. But you," She places her finger to Bernie's nose, "Are mine."

They laugh and drink their wine recalling the various silly things Liberty had done that night; Serena recalling her favourite and doing her impression of Liberty saying, "This is Ber-nie." Tilting her head to one side and then the other.

Bernie burst into her loud laugh, "I could have died."

"Do you think Edward gets embarrassed by her?" Serena asked.

Bernie contemplated for a second, "She probably has many good qualities."

"That isn't an answer."

"It is. Anyway, I was watching them tonight, far more discreetly than Edward was watching us, I might add. I came to this conclusion. Edward married her to recapture his youth, thinking she would make him young."

"Not in dispute."

"But it comes with a price. Not only is she young, she is immature."

Serena nodded, "And she can't handle her booze, which, if you are trying to keep up with 'Eddie'; would be a problem."

"They put on a show Serena, Edward probably gets pissed to forget what an airhead she is. I suspect the reason he was so mean to you tonight because he is jealous."

Serena smiled, "You think so?"

"I know so. He was trying to demean you and our relationship; because you have moved on and have something he does not have."

Bernie looked at her watch, "come on we better drink up and head for the train. I'm not sure but it might be the last direct one tonight."

They headed for the train station hand in hand, feeling much better about the evening. They arrived with a few minutes to spare. They saw from the boards that it was indeed the last direct train to Holby.

They managed to find some seats and settled in window seats facing each other. They were looking out of the window as the train doors closed ready to pull off. As it was about to pull off Bernie saw Edward and Liberty running on to the platform. They were looking as they saw the train they needed pull off from the station. Edward caught Bernie's eye, so she pulled Serena to her and kissed her as she flipped him the bird from the window of the moving train. _Have that you bastard!_

Serena looked at her with a questioning look, Bernie just pointed to the sorry looking pair on the platform disappearing into the distance. Serena put her hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter, "It's going to take them ages to get home, isn't it."

"Yeah, and that's if they can figure out which trains they will need to get."

"Quite."

"Look I know it would be nice to watch them suffer but we are not like them, should we throw them a lifeline?"

Serena tipped her head.

Bernie got out her phone and called Ellie's number.

"Hi Ellie."  
"Bernie, Hi, is mum OK. How upset is she from one to ten?"

"She's fine, listen, you might want to call your dad. We have just watched them miss the last train to Holby."

"What?"

Bernie laughed a little, "Yeah, we are on the last direct train, they are not. I am not sure if they will know which train they need to get on now."

"For fucks sake. That means I'm going to have to sort them out."

"Yes Ellie, you invited them, they are your problem."

"OK. Um, thanks Bernie it was nice of you to let me know. Left to them they might end up in Scotland."

"No problem, not that I would expect the same courtesy from them, so look, don't let on we told you. Just call and ask if he got on the last train alright?"

"Yeah sure. Look I'm sorry about earlier, shouting at you. You were right to leave."

As Ellie was talking Bernie mouthed 'Sunday Dinner' to Serena; Serena nodded back.

"I'm sorry for you know, being a bit… you know. Listen come over tomorrow for Sunday lunch OK."

"I'll bring the wine."

"You're on."

"Right, better sort out the kids hadn't I. Hope you and mum get back OK."  
"We will, see you tomorrow."

Bernie put her phone away, "You really are too nice Bern." Bernie shrugged, "I know."

The rest of the journey went well. Bernie received a text from Elinor, "Hi Bern, I spoke to dad and Lib; unless I got a train with them (no way!) There is no way they would get on the right trains. Booked them into the shittiest B&B. Serves them right! I'll let you tell Mum the good news."

Bernie was laughing out loud, so much so the few other passengers turned to look. Bernie passed her phone to Serena who read the message, "She's her mother's daughter alright!"

They got a taxi back home and let themselves in. Jason was stopping at Alan's so that Serena did not have to worry about what time they got back. All in all it had been a good night, not least because Edward got his just desserts.

Serena leaned on Bernie's arm as she removed her shoes. "Don't know about you, but I suddenly feel very drunk and very tired. Sleep beckons."

Bernie held on to the bannister to remove her shoes. "You read my mind. Lead the way darling."


	48. Chapter 51

Serena was chopping up the veg for the Sunday lunch now that the meat and the Potatoes were sorted. Bernie was sitting on the worktop next occasionally stealing a carrot baton from the pile. Music was playing on the radio and they were chatting easily.

Serena had never allowed Ellie to sit on the kitchen worktop, but for some reason she did not mind Bernie doing so; much like Bernie always perched on Serena's desk at work rather than using her ergonomically designed chair. She liked having her close. She liked that Bernie did not invade her personal space but certainly orbited close enough so that if Serena wanted to draw her in, she was there.

Serena was joking about how she would chop Bernie's fingers off if she kept on stealing carrots. Bernie saw it as a challenge and said she would draw on her stealth army skills.

They heard the front door go and Ellie came in holding flowers and two bottles of wine.

"Hiya Mum, Bern." She placed the wine down and held out the flowers to Serena, "These are for you mum, sorry about yesterday. I forgot what a bastard dad can be when he is pissed and in one."

Serena shrugged and waved her hand as if to dismiss.

"No but, I should have known it would go tit's up. I just suppose I had an unrealistic vision. I wanted you and dad to see my first night on the show. I thought he might behave."

Bernie smiled at Ellie, "I think he got his just desserts didn't he."

"Oh god yeah, he told me what you did at the train station. Pisser. Did you really give him the finger as you pashed mum on the train?"

"Um, yeah, maybe…" She laughed, "Does that make me a bitch?"

Ellie laughed. Serena revelled in this. Edward had been shaken by yesterday. "Yeah apparently, you are; what were his words; a 'head case' and you deserve each other."

Bernie laughed, "I'll take that, right love?" She looked at Serena.

Serena laughed hard, "Yeah". She slapped Bernie's hand has she picked up another carrot baton.

Elinor pushed herself from the wall where she was leaning, "Anyone for a drink?"

Bernie raised her hand as if she was at school and Serena looked as if to say, 'You don't need to even ask.'

Ellie poured wine and placed glasses by Serena and then by Bernie. Noticing that her mum seemed quite content to let Bernie take up worktop space.

"Anyway," Ellie started a little affronted, "You never let me sit on the work top, how come Bernie gets away with it?"

Bernie gave a grin with a carrot baton sticking out. "Special privileges."

"Urgh, I don't want to know." Ellie made a mocking grimace. In fact she was happy to see her mum content; she was happy to see she was loved. Happy to see Bernie had her back. Yes she loved her dad but he was not exactly nice to her mum and if she had to take sides… it would always be Mum.

Just then Ellie's phone rang, "Are you OK if I take this?" She winked, Bernie noticed it was the same wink her mum was good at giving. No one could say no to it.

"Go for it darling, we have a while until we eat."

Ellie went out to the conservatory, Serena sensed that the conversation was with a bloke, rather than one of her housemates or girl mates. Ellie was sensible enough and to be fair they did not really discuss love lives.

Serena looked up at Bernie and moved so that she was now standing in the gap in Bernie's legs as she sat sipping her wine. She could tell that Bernie was pensive and decided to try and call it, ""You're not a 'head case', you know that don't you?" Serena did not know why she said it but she felt she needed to say it. Bernie acted immaculately last night. Edward was just a jealous prick and his main issue was that Bernie had not rose to his bating but had still managed to get the last word as it were.

"Ur, um, are you sure. I mean I did practically cause a scene in the restaurant as we left, I also raised my voice with Ellie and then the train stunt. I didn't have to do that. I was lowering us to their level."

"Bernie, please. You did not cause a scene. If you had not removed us from that situation I would have lost it, so you took pre-emptive action. As for Ellie, justified; no harm done. Oh and the train, don't worry about that. I think the only person who would not laugh at that is 'Eddie'." She put an emphasis on the word 'Eddie' as if to support the ridiculousness of it all. "Plus you did let Ellie know he missed the train, those are not the actions of a 'head case'."

Serena pushed up on her tip toes to catch Bernie in a kiss. Her hands wrapping around Bernie's waist as Bernie's hands went into Serena's hair. With Jason upstairs and Ellie deep in conversation out back they indulged in a deep, passionate, lingering kiss. They were interrupted by the oven timer going off loudly. The kiss did not break straight away but when it did Serena commented, "I'm going to need you to move your arse Major, I need the work space, unless you want a beef joint in your lap. "

"No, I'm good. I'll just go and get some air." As she goes to jump from the counter Serena places her hands on Bernie's thighs, "Are you OK?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"Well you going out to get air. You either smoke, think or both. Not that I mind you smoking but.." She paused, "Don't go outside, if it's something we can discuss. I can put the beef over there." She nodded her head to the table.

Bernie sighed, Serena read her all too well. "OK, but promise not to get mad."

"Why would I be mad?" She removed the beef from the oven and returned to stand between Bernie's legs and put her hands on Bernie's thighs rubbing up and down.

"Well, um, I think it me just being stupid, my stupid insecure brain."

"Uh, OK. As you have said to me before, it's only stupid if you don't tell me and you let it fester."

Bernie smiled, she had her there.

"OK, so, ah; yesterday at the restaurant Edward said something and I didn't think about it at the time, but now, it's playing on my mind." She paused, "He said you will always hold a candle for him."

She put her head down and her hair covered her face, she didn't want to finish her sentence as it was so stupid now she was saying it out loud. Luckily Serena knew where this was going.

Serena stopped rubbing Bernie legs and gripped slightly. "Bernie, look at me please." She said quite seriously but in a kind way. Bernie raised her head to look at her. Serena started to shake her head slowly as she spoke, "I harbour no feelings whatsoever for that man. Not anymore. I am going to be truthful; there was a time when I still did, even after everything he put me through, even after the divorce. For a long time after. A couple of years ago he came to the hospital as a locum, it was when I was acting CEO." She paused and put her hand to Bernie's cheek, "I was passed over for the CEO position and Edward was there as a shoulder to cry on and I, I accepted it. We tried again." She shrugged, "It was a couple of months, but eventually I realised that he had not changed one jot. He was shagging one of the nurses on my ward and, this is the clincher; he put both of our careers in jeopardy as he was drinking at work and putting patients in danger."

Bernie leaned forward to rest her forehead on Serena's head, "I'm sorry I even thought you might, um…"

Serena moved her head to kiss Bernie, "It did take me being made a fool of, yet again, to realise."

They kissed, Serena was sure she could feel a tear on Bernie's cheek, "Now, it is you. Only you. You consume me; my mind and body. No one can even come close, OK."

A noise interrupted their moment and Bernie jumped causing her to bang her head on the cabinet. "What the fuck!" She exclaimed, followed by "OW!" as she touched her head and looked at her fingers to see blood.

Ellie came in, "Sorry I dropped my wine glass, don't worry it was empty, no Shiraz came to harm." She looked at her mum and Bernie, "But it looks like Bernie did."

Serena held out her hand to Bernie, "Come down darling, I can't check you out all the way up there."

Ellie had gone to get the dustpan and brush as Bernie jumped off the counter and Serena ushered her to a chair as she reached for the first aid box.

Serena took a chair and drew it to sit opposite Bernie as she did the checks she usually would to check for concussion, "Don't fuss Serena, I'm fine." Bernie waved her hand.

"Indulge me." Serena clipped.

She cleaned the wound. The cut was not too deep or long, certainly not hospital worthy, especially as Serena's first aid box was probably better stocked than any hospital. The side effect of living with the most accident prone nephew on the planet. She applied a couple of steristrips and applied a kiss to the side of the injury. "No lasting damage."

Bernie smiled, Serena could be a bit of a fuss pot, but she decided she liked it.

Elinor had taken the broken glass out to the bin and came in to see the scene of her mum fixing Bernie up. She smiled. She did not think she had ever seen her dad and Liberty show such affection towards each other. She then remembered the picture Liberty had sent her in the early hours of the morning.

As Serena moved of her chair and perched on Bernie's knee Elinor took the vacated seat. "Sorry for making you jump Bernie, are you OK?"

"Yeah, you know what they say, 'where there's no sense, there's no feeling' right?"

They laughed.

"I've got something to show you that'll make you laugh."

She pulls out her phone to get whats app up. She then passes her phone to Bernie so that she and Serena can see the last message from Liberty. It's a picture. A selfie of Liberty to the left side of the picture with smudged makeup from where she had been crying. To the right in the background was the scene of a depressing looking B&B room; on the bed Edward was passed out face down in a state of partial undress. The caption read, "Els how could you leave me here!? #living nightmare."

Bernie laughed, "I think I found my new screensaver."

Serena cuddled Bernie and whispered in her ear, "I definitely had a lucky escape."


	49. Chapter 52

A couple of weeks had passed and Christmas was fast approaching. Bernie had started to rebuild her relationship with Charlotte. Things with Cam were good. His rotation on AAU definitely helped. Cameron seemed alright with Bernie's relationship with Serena and to be fair he thought his mum had chosen well. Despite nearly fucking it up. That had not gone unnoticed by the sensitive young man.

Bernie had invited Cameron and Charlotte to go out for a meal with her and Serena. Despite Charlotte thawing out somewhat, and accepting that Serena entered the equation after her parents' divorce, she was still a little sceptical. She had outright asked Bernie if Serena was a rebound thing. Asked if Bernie was testing the waters with another woman, just to check if she was actually gay. Despite the discomfort of Charlotte's quizzing Bernie had answered honestly and frankly; so much so that Charlotte did have to say, "Too much information Mum."

Charlotte and Cam were already at the restaurant. Secretly Charlotte was looking forward to meeting Serena. Given how much her mum and her brother had carped on about her she must be something amazing. To be fair anyone willing to put up with 'Major Fuckup' must be special. That had been one of less kind names for her mother. Serena must be a keeper because mum had already messed her about and she was still around. To be fair it seemed like Bernie was all but living with Serena; which was a feat in itself.

Bernie and Serena were in a taxi, Bernie dropped a message to Cam to say they were a few minutes away. She was a little nervous, to say the least. This did not go unnoticed by Serena. She grabbed Bernie's hand. "Hey, if one of us is supposed to be nervous, it's supposed to be me right." She laughed a little. Bernie smiled. "You, my darling have nothing to worry about; Cameron has bigged you up somewhat and both of the kids have seen a positive change in me since I got back from the Ukraine."

Serena smiled, "Ah, so there is an expectation to live up to then? No pressure eh Major?"  
"None whatsoever darling." She turned and smiled "Just be yourself."

The taxi pulled over in the middle of town. It was busy. Late night shopping and Christmas Party revellers. Bernie was somewhat relieved that they had this Friday night off. It would be their last weekend off before Christmas. They were going to make the most of it.

Bernie paid the taxi driver and held out her hand to assist Serena out of the taxi. It was a little slippy underfoot as it had tried to snow, but it was that pain in the arse slush now. They linked arms, more to offer each other support as they walked to the restaurant. Bernie let out a long breath and turned to Serena before they went in; "Serena, in case I don't get chance to say it later; you look amazing and I am proud to call you my partner."

Serena leaned up and gave Bernie a quick kiss, "I hope you are not getting all soppy on me Major."

Bernie laughs, "For some reason I no longer feel the need to hide behind my British reserve."

They both laughed, "Good, I like it." Serena confirmed.

Unbeknown to Serena and Bernie Charlotte and Cameron were sitting in a booth looking out on to the street and could see the exchange between Bernie and Serena. Charlotte smiled; despite not knowing what they were talking about she had honestly not seen her mum look so free and relaxed in forever. "Are they always like that Cam?" Charlotte asked of her brother.

He smiled, "Yeah, well they tone it down at work but generally they are, yeah." He gestured his hand to the scene outside.

"I've never seen mum like that, have you?"

Cameron smiled, shook his head; "Serena has changed Mum for the better."

They smiled as the two ladies approached, they were sitting one side and Serena and Bernie slid into the other side so that Serena was opposite Cam. Bernie was beaming. The 3 most important people to her together. All was well.

The waiter came and took drinks orders and they all relaxed into the evening. Serena asked Charlotte a lot of questions as she had been told by Bernie and Cam that, much like Ellie, her favourite subject was talking about herself. Charlotte asked Serena about Elinor and Jason. Serena realised that Bernie must have spoken very fondly about them both and Charlotte had paid attention.

The starters arrived and they very much enjoyed the food. Bernie had asked Cam and Charlotte where they wanted to go and as she had promised it was her treat they had picked somewhere pretty decent.

When the waiter took away their starter plates Serena excused herself to go to the loo.

The second she was gone from the table Charlotte took her chance, "Mum, how the fuck did you manage to get someone as nice as Serena?"

Bernie held her hands up and shrugged, "Ask me another, I know I'm bloody lucky."

"She really likes you doesn't she?" Charlotte posed.

Bernie nodded, "The feeling is very much mutual sweetheart."

"Have you dropped the L bomb yet then?" Cam chuckled.

Bernie looked a little embarrassed, the kids laughed. "Ha ha, she really has you hook line and sinker doesn't she?"

Bernie nodded. "Listen, before Serena gets back; she is big on 2 things, family and Christmas. She is going to ask if you would like to do something with us, Jason and Elinor at some point at Christmas. I'm not saying Christmas day, but something around would be nice."

"Family and Christmas fan eh, opposite to you then eh Mum." Charlotte said, not with malice, it was an observation.

"Sure mum, will check in with dad see what he's doing and work; but yes. Judging by the look of you Serena is a good cook. Definitely a yes from me." Cam commented.

"We will sort something Mum, it might mean 2 Christmases though." Charlotte added.

Bernie laughed hard, "Jason certainly won't mind that." She saw Serena walking back, "Serena is helping to change my mind about many things, including family." She reached out a hand for each of her children.

Serena took her seat, "Not interrupted a moment have I?"

Charlotte smiled at Serena, a genuine smile, "No, of course not. In fact we can see what a good influence you are on mum."

The main meals arrived, again they were not disappointed. Bernie was so happy that everything was going well she finally allowed herself to relax. The contact between Bernie and Serena did not go unnoticed by the kids.

As they ate Serena felt Bernie rub her arm and give her what Charlotte would only describe as 'a knowing look'.

Serena was feeling brave, and buoyed by the success of the evening so far, she wanted to broach the subject of Christmas but was fearful that if Cam and Charlotte were unable to make it that Bernie would be disappointed.

Charlotte decided to throw Serena a rope. "So Serena, what are your feelings on Christmas? You do realise you are dating the Grinch right?"

Serena smiled, how did Charlotte know? She suspected that Bernie had a hand in ensuring that the topic swung to Christmas.

Serena laughed loudly and reached for Bernie's hand, "I think you will find that the Major's heart has grown a few sizes in the last couple of months."

Cam laughed, as did Charlotte. Serena was as sharp as a tack and knew her Dr Seuss.

"In answer to your question, I am big on Christmas. BIG. As this is my first Christmas with Jason too I would very much like it to be special. Also it seems that my daughter and I call a yuletide truce and it is the one time of year that we never argue."

Bernie laughed, "It is probably because you spoil her and feed her well."

"Not going to deny it darling, but let's face it you suddenly like Christmas too."

"Yes because you spoil me and feed me well." The table erupted with laughter.

"I'm sure there are other reason's too." Charlotte quipped with a wink. Bernie went a fabulous shade of red.

"Well um, ah yes. Anyway, Christmas invitations extended. Please consider it." Bernie said with sincerity.

"We have plenty of space if you want to stay over." Serena added.

"Or you can stop at my flat." Bernie added.

Charlotte smiled, "So what's the deal with you two?"

Bernie looked, "What do you mean?"

"Living together or what? You've heard the joke haven't you? 'What does a lesbian take on a second date… a removal van!'"

Bernie and Serena looked at each other, they had not really categorised it, or made an official arrangement.

They laughed and held hands, Bernie took this one, "We are just taking each day as it comes. I spend a lot of time at Serena's but…. We work around the hospital and Jason mainly."

Cam nodded, "You will like Jason Charl, he speaks as he finds and totally gets away with it right Mum."

"Haha, yes. Most definitely."

"Where is he tonight?" Charlotte asked.

Serena smiled, "Well I did invite him but today is the day he sees his girlfriend and we cannot interrupt that. He has his routine. Plus he likes familiar. Not too many new things at a time."

"Yeah probably best you meet him on familiar ground." Bernie added.

"Can't wait." Charlotte beamed. Serena noticed that when she smiled she looked exactly like her mother.

They finished up their drinks and Bernie paid for the meal and ordered taxis. She went to the toilets before they left. Serena did not tell her they were how far away they were. No wonder she was so long earlier. Serena was left with Cam and Charlotte.

"So Cam, when are you next working?"

"Tomorrow, split."

"Superb, you have the pleasure of my company for the day." Serena touched his arm. Cam noticed she was a tactile kind of person. "How about you Charlotte?"

"The intention is to study." Charlotte pulled a face.

"The best laid plans eh!"

"Yeah, that's the one." Charlotte laughed, it was a similar to Bernie's laugh; hearty and loud.

"Is it more likely you will end up studying the cocktail menu at the bar."

"No comment."

Charlotte decided she liked Serena. She was good for mum. She was a good person and she was funny. She only hoped that her mum did not balls it up. She deserved some happiness. Yeah she was pissed about mum's affair and upset about the divorce and all of the fallout from that; but she wanted the best for her mum and honestly thought her mum had dropped on with this one.

Her thought was interrupted by Bernie's return. Bernie came up behind Serena and wrapped her arms around Serena's waist as they waited for the taxis. She pulled money from her pocket and passed it to Cam. "For the cab. Will you both let me know you are home safe please?"

Cam and Charlotte nodded as their taxi pulled up closely followed by one for Bernie and Serena.

As Bernie and Serena entered their cab Bernie took a sigh of relief.

"OK?" Serena asked as she rubbed Bernie's leg.

"More than." Bernie said in a content tone. "Thank you; you know I love you very much."

"Yes, the feeling is mutual."

Bernie felt very relaxed and could not wait to get home and show Serena how much she loved and appreciated her.


	50. Chapter 53

It was Christmas Eve and despite having to do the night shift Bernie was in good spirits, Christmas spirit in fact. Cam and Charlotte had both agreed to come for Christmas lunch. Marcus had elected to work on Christmas day and so the kids did not really feel bad about agreeing to see their mum.

Marcus knew they were spending the day with Bernie and Serena as well as her family; not that he had a problem with Serena per se. In fact when he had met her he respected her as a fellow medic and it seemed she knew how to stand up for herself; especially to Bernie. No, the fact was that it irked him that Bernie had not made much effort with her own family and had caused their 25 year marriage to end and was now part of a new family. A family she was making an effort with; a family she was drawing their kids into. Not that he had completely voiced his concerns, well annoyances, to the kids. He had just warned them not to get to close to Bernie until they knew it was not another flash in the pan thing again. He knew that she could be a good mother to them, when she applied herself to the task; but more often than not it was more of a hobby than a full time obligation.

The plan was that Ellie would come Christmas Eve and stop over; Bernie would go to work and return early hours Christmas morning. While she slept Serena and Jason would visit Alan, Celia and Jason's mum's grave.

Serena had her plan of action for the Christmas dinner, most of the prep she was doing now. Cameron and Charlotte were due over about 1pm to eat at three.

It was 7pm and Serena had made Bernie something to eat before she went to work. She was busy doing something obscene to a Turkey; or at least that's what it looked like to Bernie. Serena was wearing a Christmas apron and sparkly Christmas earrings. Bernie was just thinking how cute she looked when the phone rang. It was Ellie's ringtone.

"Can you get that darling, I'm elbow deep in a Turkey." She laughed.

Bernie got up and answered it. "Hiya Mum, it's me." She sounded a little tipsy.

"Hi Ellie, it's Bernie. Your mum is currently assaulting a Turkey."

"Oh, ah; is she going full tilt on dinner prep for tomorrow."

"Something like that yes."

Ellie laughed, "Can you hold up the phone for her, I need to speak to her."

Bernie put it on speaker phone, "Ellie, you are on speakerphone." Serena warned just in case Ellie said something inappropriate. Ellie did not know what being reserved was like, at all.

"Ha, OK cool. Better not ask about your sex life or anything eh Mum?" She was laughing, they could hear laughter in the background. It was obvious she was in a bar.

Bernie pulled a face and points at the phone as if to ask if Serena does discuss their sex life with her daughter. Serena shook her head firmly and mouthed, "NO WAY!"

"So mum, was wondering if you could come and pick me up from town later?"

"No darling I can't, I have too much to do, and besides you know that I will have had more than one Shiraz by now."

"Bollocks, a taxi is going to cost a fortune tonight."

"Should have thought about that before you went out." Serena pointed out.

"Yes, thanks mother."

Bernie looked at Serena, she was probably going to regret this but she opened her mouth, "Um, Ellie, I could come and pick you up, but it would have to be before ten as I am working tonight."

Serena rolled her eyes.

"Oh yeah, sure. We are all splitting after this drink, so yeah that would be mint."

"Ok well text me the time and where you want picking up and I will be there."

"Thanks Bernie." The phone went dead as Ellie now had what she wanted.

"You didn't have to do that." Serena said has she washed her hands.

"I know, but it's safer and cheaper than a taxi; plus you get a drinking buddy when I go to work. Call it my way of making up for working tonight." She puts her arms around Serena and pulls her in.

"I have you tomorrow that is more important to me." Serena kisses Bernie, her Bernie. Yes she was a bit miffed that Bernie had the night shift but given that Hanssen had allowed them both to have Christmas day off and their other shifts over Christmas coordinated pretty well Bernie had taken some of the graveyard shifts in return.

"I promise you won't even miss me. I will be back before you know it." Bernie's phone went off. It was Ellie requesting a lift in half an hour. "Right Campbell you better put me down. My taxi services are required. Plus I can't guarantee my mind will be on work if I spend any more time in your arms." She gave Serena another hug and kissed her gently.

As she put on her coat she turned back, "Serena?"

"Mmmm."

"You don't discuss, us; um well our, you know with Ellie, do you."

"Our sex life Bernie?" Serena confirmed. Bernie looked sheepish. "No darling, there are some subjects that are taboo between Ellie and I. This is one of them. Ellie said that on the phone because she is tipsy and she likes to say things to shock and provoke people. Why do you think she went into journalism?"

"Sorry, I had to, um, check."

"No, that's fair enough. Just remember when you pick Ellie up she might say things to test your mettle."

"Duly noted." She strode across the kitchen to snatch one more kiss before laughing and heading off before Serena could react.

Bernie was in the agreed place at the agreed time. She had plenty of time before her shift started. Ellie came over, she had a suitcase on wheels. Bernie got out so she could put it in the boot. "Boozing straight from the train eh?"

"Started well before the train. Then I had to check in with a few people, so I've had a bit of a sesh to be honest. Don't tell mum." She said drunkenly attempted to get into Bernie's low 2 seater.

"I think she may notice that you are a few drinks in Ellie." Bernie laughed and opened the window as they turned onto the main road.

"Hey Bernie, thanks for this."

"No problem. Just remember to give me a good rating on Uber." Bernie laughed.

"Will do. Oh can you stop at the shop too, want to pick up some booze; show mum I aren't a complete sponger."

"I'm sure she doesn't think that, but yeah; as long I have time before work."

"Isn't it a bit wank working the night shift on Christmas Eve?"

Bernie laughed, "Yeah, it can be if it is busy and it can be if it is too quiet. I console myself with the fact I get tomorrow with Serena. That makes it bearable."

Bernie pulled up outside the shop and Ellie nipped in. As she got back in the car Bernie held out a box, and offered it to Ellie. "What's that?" Ellie asked hoping it wasn't a bloody engagement ring.

"It's my present to Serena. And, um before you jump to conclusions; it isn't an engagement ring. It's just a ring." Ellie opened the box. It was a Pandora ring, it was one of the droplet style rings containing Serena's birthstone.

"Bernie that's really nice, I think mum will love it. How did you get her ring size?"

"I was in the army you know, I'm…. resourceful."

They laughed as Bernie pulled up outside the house. "Are you coming in?" Ellie asked as she handed the ring back.

"No, um work starts in half an hour and if I come in it will make it harder to leave."

Bernie got out of the car and got Ellie's case out of the boot. Ellie was trying to get out of Bernie's car. A bit of a feat when you have a bag full, and a body full, of alcohol. The security light came on as Serena opened the door. Bernie was just coming to the front of the car with Ellie's case. Serena went over to take Ellie's case; as to her it seemed that Ellie was quite incapable. As she grabbed the handle on the case she pushed Bernie against the front of her car and kissed her, not really caring that Ellie was there or whether the neighbours saw.

"Oh god, get a room will ya; or at least wait until I aren't stuck in Bernie's car."

Bernie smiled into the kiss, she turned to Ellie. "I'm on a time limit, get moving."

Ellie eventually got out of the car in rather an inelegant manner and tutted with a smile as she went to the warmth of the house.

"I wasn't joking when I said I was on a time limit Frauline." Bernie said as Serena held on to her.

"I know, I wish you didn't have to go though."

"I know but as of 6am tomorrow I am all yours OK." She kissed her forehead and leaned up from the car.

"You better go, before I stop you." Serena said with a smile. There was a knock on the window and Ellie held up two large glasses of wine. They let go of each other's hands until just finger tips touched. As Bernie got in the car she willed her 8 hour shift to go as quickly as possible.


	51. Chapter 54

Bernie heard her phone go off at exactly 12.01, she did not need three guesses to know that this was Serena. She opened the text, "Hello you, Merry Christmas, please wake me up when you get in. Sx"

Bernie smiled. To be fair this was the first Christmas she had looked forward to since her kids were children. "Hello yourself. Merry Christmas. Now get yourself to bed, you have a busy day tomorrow and we all know what you are like when you don't get enough sleep. Bx"

The phone rang, "What do you bloody mean by that Wolfe?" Serena asked in a drunken tone, it was playful and made Bernie laugh.

"You can be bloody grumpy on lack of sleep." Bernie replied.

"Ha, you know me well. I promise off to bed now. I have a nice Christmas present for you when you get in."

"Oh Serena Campbell are you being a tease?"

"Absolutely I am." She laughed, there was a knock at the door. Morven had taken delivery of the pizzas ordered by Bernie. That was the deal. Bernie pays, Morven fetches.

"Ha, wouldn't expect anything less from you. Now as much as I love you my midnight pizzas have arrived."

"Ham and pineapple?"

"You know me well." Bernie laughed, "Right off to bed you."

"Yes Major. Love you."

"Love you too." Bernie put the phone down.

Morven smiled as Bernie went red.

The rest of the troops descended on the consultant office once they were aware that Bernie had pizza to share.

Bernie had just been dealing with a couple of drunks, a girl with glass in her leg and another with glass in her hand. Typical nightclub shenanigans. Pissed up and fell on the pavement. Sent up by the ED, given that they were swamped and AAU were eating pizza and playing UNO. Connie Beauchamp would be doing her nut if she knew. When she called Bernie up to see if they had spare beds she had to get her lot to quieten down before she answered the phone.

She came back to her office, she was tired. She told Morven that she did not wish to be interrupted unless there was an emergency. She pulled some paperwork towards her, she should at least try and get some of that done, not least to pass the time. Then she remembered she had not wrapped Serena's presents yet. She pulled out the gifts and wrapping paper recalling her last bad wrapping efforts and vowing to do better this time. There was a knock at the door as she wrangled with trying to wrap the small ring box. Morven entered, "Sorry Ms Wolfe, Um, can I get a second opinion on bay 3 please. She's the drunk one but with the hand lacerations but she is acting a bit strange."

"Strange, like off her face strange or other strange?" Bernie said between attempting to rip sticky tape off a roll with her teeth.

"Struggling there boss?" Morven asked.

"Mmmm just a bit. Fancy a swap?"

Morven smiled as she took Bernie's seat and Bernie went out to deal with the drunk.

Other than her being sick over Bernie's scrubs and admitting she might have done a bit of Whizz there was no drama for the rest of the shift and it went quite quickly much to everyone's relief.

Bernie had her coat on and was ready to leave. Morven had done a lovely job on wrapping the presents. So much so Serena would know that this was not Bernie's work. She couldn't wait to give Serena her presents, nor could she wait to see what Serena had got for her. Naughty thoughts crossed her mind as she put her car in gear and sped home.

Bernie entered the house quietly and the house was full of slumber. She quietly entered the bedroom. Serena was fast asleep and so she decided not to wake her just yet. She needed a shower. Not least because she felt like she still smelt of sick, with a hint of Sambucca; plus hot showers after a night shift always helped her to relax and sleep.

She stood under the shower and took some deep breaths. The weight of her first Christmas with Serena was hitting her. The domestic bliss of it all. She could not help but wonder if this Christmas would go well. Especially with two families joining together. She just hoped that world war three did not break out. She knew how Charlotte could start an argument or kick off. Especially with a few vodkas in her.

She must have been in the shower a good while ruminating about various Christmas scenarios, none ending too well. She got out and changed into her pyjamas ready to cuddle up to Serena. She got in bed and pressed her front against Serena's back. Serena stirred, "Um, why didn't you wake me when you got in?" she said sleepily.

Bernie whispered, "You looked peaceful and I needed a shower."

"Mmmm you do smell nice." Serena said as she turned over so that she was facing Bernie. Bernie ran her hands over Serena. "So do you want your Christmas present?" Serena said with a dirty grin.

"I thought we were doing presents later? Once the kids are here." Bernie thinks she knew the theme of Serena's gift, but Serena wasn't the only one who could be playful.

"Oh trust me, you don't want to open this one in front of the kids."

With that Serena moved swiftly so that she was on top of Bernie straddling her. Sitting proudly atop of her. "So do you want to unwrap me?"

"God yeah." Bernie had suddenly woken up, she was playing with the hem of Serena's silk nightdress. Bernie sat up as she pulled the nightdress off and took in the sight of Serena. Serena had found out that Bernie loved the sexy underwear and very much took advantage of it as she loved wearing it. "Festive." Bernie said with a nod as she felt the sexy bra. Serena was ravishing. "When did you put on the makeup?" Bernie asked. Serena looked perfect, there is no way she had slept in makeup.

"Whilst you were messing about in the shower. I had to occupy myself somehow."

Bernie laughed, "I'm sorry; a girl puked up on me earlier. All yours now." Serena kissed Bernie hard.

"Not too tired are you darling?" Serena asked genuinely

"No, not at all. You?"

"Nope, feel very awake actually; but we don't have to do anything to 'strenuous'"

"Sounds good. I'll let you take the lead." Bernie was still taking Serena in running her surgeon hands over Serena's ticklish parts. Serena was laughing loudly.

"You really like doing that don't you."

Bernie nodded and put her lips to Serena's pulse point, "I do."

"So you are now a little overdressed Major. I think I need to do something about that." With that she pulled off Bernie's top and took one of Bernie's nipples in her mouth. She climbed off Bernie and pulled off her bottoms. "Come on, kneel like this for me."

Bernie changed her position to mirror Serena's and then Serena bought herself to Bernie so that they were kneeling facing each other, knees intertwined thighs rubbing against each other's wet core's. "Wow, this is hot. You been googling again Campbell?" Bernie was rubbing herself hard against Serena's body.

"Yeah." They were kissing heavily and really going for it. Serena forgot that Ellie was in the room next door, "Fuck Bernie." She puffed heavily as she could feel a super orgasm coming. Bernie could feel hers rising too. She dipped her hand into Serena's knickers to finger Serena's clit. Serena was gripping Bernie's hair and kissing her neck as her orgasm ripped through her body. As she came Bernie also came. They fell on to the bed laughing.

"Jesus Serena."

"You need to get some sleep now darling." Serena stated as Bernie's eyes looked tired.

"Are you staying in bed?"

"No love, it's nearly 7. I have sprouts to sort." She kissed Bernie's head and pulled the covers as Bernie was now all but snoring.

Serena dressed and went downstairs to prepare for a perfect Christmas.


	52. Chapter 55

A/N- Hello Berena fans- not sure about you guys but I am a mess after Tuesday's episode. Shit! That was brilliant.

Anywho- this chapter is a bit longer, a bit angstier and naughtier (I am sorry)

Hope you all enjoy- thinking of slapping a bow on this particular story soon.

CH55

Bernie was running Charlotte and Cam home and dropping off Jason at Celia's as he had been invited over to spend the night there and remain there on Boxing Day. Serena did not really mind that it left just herself, Bernie and Elinor. Selfishly she wished Elinor would bugger of to her father's. After her display today she was not really in the mood for being endlessly hospitable to her daughter, _especially since she had voiced her opinions so eloquently too._ She just had go open her mouth. Did not help that it seemed that Charlotte was of the same ilk once she had a few vodka's down her.

Bernie had called it all along and Serena sensed this was why she had not had anything to drink that day. She wanted to ensure she had a clear head to referee any arguments and potentially remove troublemakers _(Charlotte)_ when or if it was required.

Once Bernie had left in her car, she went upstairs and left Elinor downstairs smoking in the garden. Not before she had given her a piece of her mind.

"For Christ sake Ellie, you had to go and open your fucking mouth didn't you."

"Oh so it's OK for Bernie's army brat's to have a pop and I am supposed to stand there and take it?"

"NO I am not saying it was OK for Charlotte to say those things, but you did not have to rise to it."

"I was defending you mum and Bernie to be fair."

"No, that's not what that was; you were as bad as her. Always the bloody alcohol talking with you."

"Oh, pot, kettle mother."

"Don't you dare Elinor. I bought you up better. How the hell do you think Bernie feels now?" Serena shouted.

"I'm not that bothered, she's your girlfriend and her daughter was disrespectful in our home."

"And YOU were disrespectful in MY home…. Oh I give up. Two wrongs don't make a right! I'm off to bed."

She stormed off with the remainder of the bottle of Shiraz hoping that Bernie was back soon.

Bernie dropped Jason off first. He had been infinitely patient today especially with the fracas that kicked off between Charlotte and Elinor. Both as bad as each other. Actually both really similar. Bernie pretty much called that something would kick off today and she had not been wrong. Only Serena had noticed she had not had any wine at dinner. She used being tired from the night shift as an excuse.

As she pulled up at Celia's parents' house she went up to the door with Jason to speak to Celia's mum. Thank her for inviting Jason tonight. Especially as they had to wait until Doctor Who had finished before he would consider leaving. Bernie was happy to pick up Jason tomorrow at any time as long as they called.

She was not looking forward to getting back into the car, at all. Cam and Charlotte had consumed quite a large amount of vodka between them and Charlotte was very much in her venomous stage of being a drunk.

"Typical, new family first eh Major." She spat at her mother as Bernie started the engine. Bernie had plenty she wished she could say. She certainly felt like telling Charlotte to shut the fuck up, but instead she was silent.

"Nothing to say. Not going to defend yourself. Not going to defend Serena and her bitch of a daughter, or that…"

Bernie slammed on the breaks, "STOP." She shouted, "Enough." She would not let her say anything ill of any of them, especially innocent Jason.

She continued to drive as they sat in silence. She pulled up outside the house. "Surprised you remembered how to find it." Charlotte said as she slammed the door.

Cam leaned forward and put his hand on Bernie's shoulder, "I'm sorry Mum, I should have done more to…"

"No Cam, you did what you could, she was never going to listen to you or me." Bernie said sadly.

"Be in touch, I'll speak to Charl." He got out of the car and went to the house.

Bernie pulled off ready to face the tension in the Campbell household.

Bernie opened the door and saw the downstairs in darkness. She went up and could hear loud music coming from Elinor's room. _The typical kind of angst ridden shite you would expect a student to play full blast. It must be really pissing Serena off._ Bernie sighed at the thought as she took her breath and opened their bedroom.

Serena was sitting in the armchair in the corner of the room with her fingers on her temples, a glass of wine on the side. She didn't look up when Bernie came in. It would be about 11pm by the time Bernie had dropped off everyone and returned. Bernie was shattered but she needed to ensure that Serena was alright before they even contemplated a disturbed sleep.

Bernie picked up her I pod from the side and put on Ben's Brother, it was relaxing and there was a couple of CD's worth on there, enough songs on there to allow them to talk and loud enough to drown out the thrum of Nirvana and the Foo Fighters.

She kneeled before Serena and placed her hands on Serena's thighs. "I'm here now darling."

Serena looked up she was crying, "I just wanted today to be perfect."

"I know, so did I." Bernie said sadly, "Are you OK?"

Serena shook her head, "I don't know. Every time I think we are going to get a break; something happens."

"I hear that." Bernie said as she put her hand to Serena's chin and then wiped away her tears.

"Are you OK Major? I mean Charlotte, and Ellie didn't pull any punches."

"Sticks and stones Serena. To a degree I probably deserved it."

Serena looked at her in the eye, "No, I don't agree. The past is past and you have built bridges and worked on relationships; just for them to throw it in your face. On Christmas too. It is not fair darling."

"Life rarely is," Bernie observed. "Listen, let me try and rescue our Christmas." She put emphasis on the word 'our'. "Fuck the lot of them, not Jason of course darling. I'm just glad he did not hear everything those pair said."

"Yes, thank god for small mercies and new headphones."

Bernie smiled, "You go and have a shower or get changed whatever; when you come back I have something nice for you. A late Christmas present."

Serena smiled. "Thank you Bernie, how can you be so… resilient?"

She shrugged, "I have you. It makes me strong."

They kissed as Serena got up and went to the en suite.

Bernie changed into some new underwear; taking a leaf out of Serena's book she thought she might try getting something other than the normal plain bra and pants that she usually wore. For a start these were matching, and blue. Not overly fancy but in Bernie terms they were. She had certainly blushed enough when she bought them.

She got into the bed and could still hear music from Elinor's room so she turned their music up a notch too. She reached down and retrieved a present that she had wrapped. No way would she have asked Morven to wrap this one.

Serena came back in to find a smug Bernie sitting in bed with the covers up. "Are you going to get in then?" She pulled back the covers and patted the spot between her legs. Serena looked in awe.

"Mmmmm you are matching. Very nice." She climbed into bed and faced Bernie. "You look amazing."

Bernie blushed. "Ha, is that the colour you went when you bought these?" Serena stroked the fabric. "This is like reverse Deja vu from this morning." She winked.

"Well, yes and no. This is not your present. More an extra. Turn around darling lean against me and close your eyes."

"I'm intrigued."

Bernie laughed as she reached for the gift and placed it in Serena's lap, "Open your eyes."

Serena picked it up, it was pretty big and heavy. A book she thought. Definitely wrapped by Bernie. She turned and gave Bernie a quizzing look. _What the hell could it be… what the hell could beat Bernie in matching sexy underwear._

"You need to open it." Bernie mused.

Serena ripped the paper open and turned the book over in her hands. She laughed loudly. This in turn made Bernie laugh, "Open it up." Bernie said excitedly.

Serena flipped the hardback open to find a message written by Bernie.

"To my dearest Frauline,

Just a little something to stop you relying on google, more idea's than Cosmo anyway.

Look forward to finding out together.

Love from your 'Big Macho Army Medic'.

PS- Page 76 looks interesting."

Bernie was kissing Serena's neck as Serena found page 76 in the book. "Ah, now I see why you wanted us to sit like this." She turned to kiss Bernie full on and then went back to the book. "This has better pictures than Cosmo," she ran her finger down the page, "and instructions too?" Bernie hooked her chin over Serena's shoulder to read.

"Yup, got it." She whispered into Serena's ear, "You up for it."

"I'm game if you are?" Serena had perked up somewhat as Bernie removed her nightdress and ran her fingers over her bare breasts.

"You OK if I take my time?" Bernie was running her hands up and down Serena's sides as she whispered in her ear. "I want to make love to you, and really savour you." Bernie rolled her hips up into Serena.

Serena managed a quiet purr as she leaned back into Bernie's body. Bernie had been really good at buying her presents. She loved the ring that Bernie had bought for her. As well as all the other little things. She really was thoughtful and kind, beautiful and funny; oh yeah- and hers." Despite all the bother earlier, Bernie had made this Christmas for her, for them. It certainly wasn't over yet.

Bernie took her time, as Serena seemed to very much enjoy the attention lavished upon her body and Bernie very much enjoyed pleasuring the woman she loves. She also managed to find some new things that really turned Serena on. One being placing kisses to the nape of Serena's neck as she ran her fingers up and down the insides of her thighs. Bernie also placed kisses to the scars on Serena's back; the memories from the abuse at the hands of her mother towards the end. Serena had felt comfortable enough to show these, talk about them and would let Bernie touch her there and kiss her.

All the while Bernie was asking if Serena was OK, asking what she wanted. Telling her she was beautiful and loved. She had given the book a quick skim read when it had arrived at the flat. She ordered it some time ago and ensured she kept it at her flat until yesterday.

Despite being under the covers Bernie could feel that Serena's skin was covered in goose bumps; she knew this was not because Serena was cold. The opposite, she was burning hot with desire. The covers had been flipped allowing a little more freedom. Bernie ran her hands down to Serena's pants. "I think these may be in the way now."

Serena was nodding quickly, unable to speak. She wanted to scream. Despite Elinor still playing her depressing music well into the night… well morning now, she was well aware that she was only next door and had not made any bones about bringing up hearing this morning's activities mid row with Charlotte. Her exact words being, "Oh at least you don't have to listen to them bonking like teenagers; like they were this morning!"

Bernie removed the pants and threw them somewhere, who cares where. She was hungry for Serena. She bucked into Serena with her body harder as her hand went to Serena's core.

"Fuck me Bernie." Serena breathed. Bernie did as she asked. Switching between her g spot and then coming out to swiftly flick her clitoris. Her spare hand playing with one of Serena's breasts. Serena was literally melting in her lap as she knew she was close, she was holding her hand to her mouth to stop herself from crying out and bringing the house down.

Bernie was inside pumping hard as Serena felt her orgasm. "Ah, oh Bernie," She breaths, "Stop, stop." Tears were coming down her face and she sounded soft; and to Bernie; in pain.

"Oh god, I'm sorry. I hurt you. Sorry, sorry."

Serena was shaking her head, she was not sure if Bernie had hurt her or if she was just tender or overwhelmed, but her body had hit the limit. "No, Bernie. Just overwhelming. Be gentle." Bernie was still inside of Serena.

Bernie was breathing hard. "Are you OK? What do you need me to do?" She kissed Serena.

"Slowly darling." Serena had composed herself and knew she was not hurt. But she had never felt anything like that before. "I'm fine. That was perfect. You took me over darling."

Serena could tell Bernie was now calming down. She turned so she was now facing Bernie and kissed her. "I don't know what you paid for that book but it has already paid for itself."

Bernie smiled, very smug indeed. "I don't know about you but I'm shagged out."

Serena breathed out as she climbed off Bernie and headed to the en suite ensuring that Bernie got a right eyeful. All of the shit of the day now forgotten as this had now made this the best Christmas on record since either could remember.


	53. Chapter 56

Serena awoke that morning, Bernie was wrapped around her nuzzling into her back. She could hear the gentle rise and fall of her breath. Serena closed her eyes and enjoyed this moment. She had an itch on her back below her shoulder blade, she reached around with her arm to try and relieve it, and she just couldn't quite reach. Just then she felt Bernie's arm move from around her waist and she scratched below where Serena's hand was. Serena sighed in relief as Bernie then kissed her back. She then snaked her hand back to its previous position ensuring she caught Serena's ticklish side on the way.

Serena laughed, "Good morning, you."

"Good morning yourself." Bernie said in a drawl.

"Didn't know you were awake darling."

Bernie smiled, "I was basking in the moment between dream land and reality." She gave Serena a squeeze and pressed her body into her.

"Me too." Serena turned around to face Bernie and caught her lips in a kiss.

"What time is it?"

"It's just gone 9 darling." Serena was happy to report.

"Ah, that's a lie in right?"

"Right." Serena winked. That always got Bernie.

"So what's the plan today?" Bernie asked ask as she nuzzled into Serena.

"Well, I was going to do a dinner but I really don't fancy round two with madam so last night I booked us a Boxing Day lunch."

"What about Elinor?" Bernie was secretly happy but had to ask anyway.

Serena pulled a face, "She does not care about our feelings, why should I reciprocate. Anyway chances are she will go round to her father's so that they can have a Serena bashing contest."

Serena kissed Bernie and ran her hands over her stomach muscles.

"Where are we going then?" Bernie was curious.

"The Metropole."

Bernie looked shocked, "The Metropole?"

Serena nodded.

"How the hell did you…?"

"Connections darling. Reception drinks at one, sit down at two. I want today to be ours; we can get a taxi."

Bernie looked excited, "Thank you for this, it sounds amazing. But what about Jason. I said I'd pick him up anytime."

Serena laughed, "Stop worrying I will sort it all."

"OK, Sorry."

As they were talking they were running their hands across each other's bodies. Serena rolled her hips into Bernie increasing their contact.

Serena looked into Bernie's eyes. "Are you OK love?"

Bernie nodded once but Serena knew that look, "Something on your mind?" Serena noted.

"I, um; well are you sure I didn't hurt you yesterday? You sounded hurt when you told me to stop."

Serena laid her hand on Bernie's cheek, "Bernie I promise I am fine, I was last night. What I felt was overwhelming. In a good way."

Serena could see tears in Bernie's eyes. "You sure?"

"Yes, what I feel with you, is so intense. No one has ever made love to me like you do. You have to understand then that there would be a point where I can take no more, a limit my body can withstand; last night you found it. That's no bad thing." She kissed Bernie deeply, "So you OK now?"

Bernie wrapped her arms around Serena, "Yes darling. I just needed to check; I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it's good we can talk about this, OK."

"Sorry."

Serena was tender and soft, "Stop worrying and stop saying sorry OK."

"Right ho. I'm just not used to this?"

"What?"

"This!" Bernie motioned her hands at the two of them lying in bed talking and cuddling.

"What. Pillow talk?"

"Yeah." She buried her head in the pillows, "I'm not used to it."

Serena put her hand to Bernie's chin to pull her from the pillow. "It's OK you know."

"Marcus and I, well..." She shrugged. "As for Alex and I, there was no pillows, so to speak."

"I understand." Serena said.

Bernie felt relief, "I didn't realise it was so easy to be open, if I am honest."

Serena flashed her trademark grin, "I do find pillow talk is the perfect way to exude candour." She leaned in to Bernie and kissed her softly. "You would tell me if it made you uncomfortable though wouldn't you?"

Bernie looked at her, she could not be anything but open and honest with Serena now. No question. "Absolutely."

Bernie loved the 'pillow talk' but she did feel a little turned on by the whole thing. She would have given it a more appropriate term; like 'pre or post shag chat' but that seemed a little sordid. At this particular moment she was thinking that the way they were going serious talking would take a back seat to other urges. She let out a rather long breath. She pulled Serena to her. "Is this pillow talk supposed to make you horny?" Her tone purposely deep and velvety.

Serena played the game a little, knowing full well the situation. "I don't know, does it?"

Bernie gave a mocking perplexed look, "It doesn't really help that you have been dry humping me for the last 20 minutes." She looked a bit embarrassed, "To be fair I came earlier when we were ' _talking'_ "

Serena looked, "You did, when?"

"Around about when you told me we were going to the Metropole. I'm sorry."

Serena pressed a kiss to Bernie's forehead, "Sorry, why? No need." She leaned to her ear, "I think it is amazing. A turn on."

Bernie was still ashamed that she came so easily at Serena's hands. _Or not as the case may be. A little shaming if the mere mention of a nice gesture and some heavy petting brings on an orgasm._

Serena did not seem upset or phased by the revelation, in fact she had taken the moment of reflection by Bernie to push her to her back and rest her body on top. She ran her hand down Bernie's front, "I'm sorry if you thought I was teasing you my darling." Her hand dipped into Bernie's pants and she gasped at how wet Bernie was. She ran her fingers through Bernie's core. "I know you have another in there for me don't you?"

Bernie purred in agreement as Serena moved her fingers swiftly to give Bernie ultimate pleasure. She was now pumping her fingers in and out of Bernie using her body to add weight to her assault.

Not that either of them heard but there was a knock at the bedroom door. At that moment Serena was concentrating on ensuring Bernie was suitably satisfied. Bernie was ensuring that she lasted long enough to show she could control herself and ensure they both got pleasure from this. Whatever happened Bernie knew she was going to come and vocalised it with a "Yes."

What followed next was something none of them expected.

Bernie came. Hard.

Serena collapsed on Bernie oblivious to anything other than her lover.

Elinor entered the room upon confirmation to find Bernie mid orgasm at her mother's hand.

"What the FUCK." Ellie exclaimed, grounded to the spot.

"Shit, sorry Serena." Bernie said as the situation played out to her.

Serena looked to her daughter in the doorway, then Bernie, then back to Ellie as Ellie slammed the door and ran down the stairs.

Serena pressed herself up from Bernie. "Shit, I, um; I'll be back." She left the bed and fastened her robe around her as she went downstairs to find Elinor.

Bernie lay in the bed trying to process the last couple of minutes. _When are we going to catch a break!_


	54. Chapter 57

Serena went downstairs after Ellie, her case and coat were at the foot of the stairs. She went through the kitchen and then the living room to see where Ellie was. She had pushed her feet into trainers knowing full well where she would be. Outside.

"I'm sorry Ellie." Serena said a little sheepishly, but stifling a laugh.

"Jesus Christ mum, last thing I wanted to do was walk in on you… it's bad enough when I hear it."

"Yeah well like I say, I'm sorry but it is my house."

Ellie cut in, "I did knock. Why the hell did one of you shout 'yes' then?"

"We were carried away." She commented a little nonchalantly for Ellie's liking, "We didn't know you had knocked. I didn't. I was busy." She laughed.

"Yeah so I bloody saw." Ellie clucked.

"Anyway not sure why you are so precious, remember when I caught you shagging, what's his name in _my_ bed?" She put the emphasis on the fact it was her bed.

Ellie smiled as she drew on her fag, "Callum, mum; it was Callum. The boyfriend I had for 3 years. Anyway that was different."

"Yes, because you were bloody 15 at the time."

"No I meant because no one my age should have to walk in on old people shagging."

"Excuse me… Bernie and I are not old. We certainly have more stamina than people your age. Anyway I think it is far worse for a mother to walk in on her 15 year old daughter being ragged by some spotty teenager."

Ellie looked and dropped a little laugh. "Call it quits."

Serena held out her hand for her daughter to shake.

"So you knocked on for something, I gather it was not to see what noise we were making. I see you are packed up to go."

"Oh yeah, Libs is picking me up in a bit. Thought you and Bernie deserved a bit of time to yourselves after yesterday."

Serena smiled, "Thank you darling, I have booked for Bernie and I to go for lunch. We are going to the Metropole."

"Look mum, about yesterday. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get mouthy. I just didn't take to Bernie's daughter. I thought she was a bit unfair to Bernie to be honest and I was trying to defend her; but the amount of wine I drank meant I was not quite as successful as I had intended."

"I understand, but just remember how you were when you first found out about us. Charlotte is a few months behind you as she only met me the other week so she is still adjusting and her parents have only just divorced remember."

"Yes, you are right mother. It's funny what clarity sobriety can bring the next day. I'd go up and apologise to Bernie now, but um." She pulled an awkward face.

"It's OK, Bernie will understand darling, but please do not feel you have to leave today because of yesterday."

"No, mum, I'm not; I promised Libs and dad I would spend today with them. Anyway you have a swish afternoon out with the Major don't you."

Serena blushed a little and quipped, "And you probably have to help Liberty to drink several bottles of Lambrini."

"Yes and we all know how Lambrini girls like to have fun." Ellie said with some measure of mocking."

They were laughing as Bernie, who was dressed came out with coffee for Serena and Ellie. "Sorry if I am interrupting but I do not want either of you to get hypothermia." Serena took the coffee graciously as she did realise she was bloody freezing as she was outside in effectively just a robe and not much else."

"Thanks Bernie." Ellie smiled.

Bernie nodded, she directed her next comment to Serena, "Why don't you go and put some bloody clothes on woman. You are going to catch your death out here in that." She winked. Bernie sat on the bench, "Don't worry, I'm not going out like this. I need to go to the flat to get my posh threads."

Serena smiled at Bernie and then Ellie. Ellie nudged her head towards the house to indicate that Serena should leave them two together.

Bernie pulled out her cigs and offered one to Ellie. Ellie accepted one and sat next to Bernie. "They smoked in silence sipping coffee before Bernie broke the silence. "I know what you were trying to do yesterday Ellie, so thank you. Unfortunately because you and my daughter are very similar it just exacerbated the situation."

Ellie was pleased that Bernie had glossed over this morning's walk in. Of the three of them she should be the more embarrassed. _Especially as I have seen your cum face._ Ellie thought to herself inwardly laughing. "She's very angry with you isn't she."

"Yes." Bernie sighed.

"Why did she agree to come yesterday?" Ellie paused as she formulated her thoughts, "Why come if she knew seeing how you were with Mum and us was just going to piss her off?"

Bernie looked at Ellie, "You do very much remind me of Charlotte." She said and added quickly, "And this is not meant offensively." Ellie had not taken it as such so listened as Bernie continued, "You are both strong and forthright. Not afraid to speak or show your emotions. I mean look how you reacted when you found out about me and how rubbish I had been regarding Serena." Bernie smiled as she drew on her cigarette, "Charlotte calls me 'the Tin Man'; this is probably one of her kinder nick names for me." She gave a sad laugh.

"So you think curiosity bought her here?"

"Mmmm, not sure. See the thing is, much like yourself 95% of the time Charlotte is good at making her point and presenting it. However, once she has had a few drinks she is unable to filter her thoughts or her mouth." Bernie looked at Ellie making it quite clear that this was a trait she felt that Elinor shared. "When Serena and I met the kids last week it went fabulously well; especially since it has taken Charlotte and I a while to rebuild our relationship. Charlotte knows I'm not perfect but she sees your mum has a good effect on me."

Ellie was intrigued now. She only knew what her mum had told her about Bernie. She knew that Bernie had been with a woman before and she was getting a divorce from her husband. But Serena had not elaborated any further. "So what happened yesterday then, to cause her to, you know; flip out?"

Bernie drained her cup, "I think it was seeing that Serena is my 'Wizard of Oz', the tin man has a heart now and Charlotte and Cam saw that. It probably hit home to her that although I love my family dearly I was always a bit…. Detached."

Bernie had not realised this revelation until she had said it out loud. A tear ran down her cheek. "I think I need to speak to Charlotte don't I."

Ellie rubbed her arm, "Sorry Bernie, I didn't mean to, you know…"

"S'OK, don't tell Serena. You get off. I imagine Liberty will be here any minute."

As if she had predicted it Ellie's phone rang, "Yes, yes. I will be there in 2 minutes. Just need to say goodbye to Mum."

Ellie smiled as Bernie got up and stretched. Ellie stepped forward and gave Bernie a hug. Bernie wrapped her arms around Ellie. "We can't promise a conventional family I'm afraid; but I'm glad we had this chat."

"Conventional, what's that? My Step-mother is 4 years older than me." Ellie laughed.

Serena was standing in the living room. She had been for a few minutes watching Bernie and Ellie. She knew then that there would be hurdles here and there but they would be OK.


	55. Chapter 58

A/N So thank you all for the follows and comments I have really enjoyed writing this story but I feel now is time to put a little bow on this so within the next few chapters I will be tying it up in order to concentrate on another story.

If you enjoy my writing then please read 'speaking as a friend' as this will shoe horn into a story regarding Serena's absence from Holby.

thanks again for all the support, here is the next chapter.

Serena and Bernie were now in the taxi on the way to the Metropole. Serena's friend had text her to check they were still coming. Serena showed Bernie the message. "You better be here soon Serena; I'm bored and want to quaff a sneaky champers with you and your new squeeze."

"So that's what I am, 'your new squeeze'?" Bernie queried as Serena chuckled. She squeezed at Bernie's side and then ran her hand down the lapel of Bernie's suit jacket. She had to say that Bernie looked amazing in her fitted suit. It was a tailored tux with a white shirt, top few buttons open. It was one that Bernie had made by the army tailor, when she was in the army and was forced to attend black tie dos. Not one to conform, she did not want to wear a dress so she had opted for this. Serena for one was glad she had, she looked hot.

"So I meant to ask, what was with the sunglasses and top down this morning?" Serena gave Bernie a smile as she recalled the scene from this morning. Serena had opened the door for Ellie to take her stuff to Edward's car. Both Liberty and Edward had arrived and sat blocking half of Serena's drive. It was at that moment Bernie had decided to fetch her tux from the flat. She walked to the hallway and put on her sunglasses, as she walked through the doorway she pressed Serena against the door and planted a kiss to her lips and then bounded out to the Mazda. As she got in she started the engine and put the roof down and took a mock double take as she pretended to notice Edward and Liberty. She gave a wave and shouted Merry Christmas as she sped out of the drive past Edward's car.

"Not sure what you mean?" Bernie said laughing.

"You know exactly what I mean, it's the 26th of bloody December."

"It was sunny."

"Sunny my arse."

"What, listen, if he is going to call me a 'head case' I might as well do something to warrant the title."

Serena laughed, it was a fair point, "You should have seen his face."

"I did." Bernie retorted as the taxi pulled up. She paid and got out as she offered Serena her hand. Serena was in an elegant cocktail dress, it was midnight blue with black patterning that you could only see at a certain angle. She was gorgeous and Bernie was very proud to have her on her arm.

They strolled up the steps to the Metropole arm in arm. The door was opened for them as they walked into a sprawling foyer. An excitable woman of a similar age to Bernie and Serena suddenly came alive at the sight of them and made her way towards them. Bernie could only assume this was Serena's friend.

"Serena, darling! You look radiant."

"Rose, how the devil are you?" Serena seemed genuinely pleased to see Rose. Bernie unhooked their arms to allow Serena to catch her friend in a hug. If there was one thing Serena was good at it was genuine, heart felt hugs.

"All the better for seeing you sweetie. Now introductions please." She tips her head to Bernie.

Serena rolled her eyes. She had told Rose all about; really all about; Bernie, but Rose had to make a fuss. They were walking towards a table containing flutes of champagne and orange juice.

"Bernie, this is Rose; my oldest and dearest friend."

"Rose, this is Bernie; my better half."

Bernie nudged Serena at that introduction because to her the opposite was true, Serena was definitely her better half.

Rose drew Bernie into a hug, "I've heard all about you, nice to put a face to the name."

"All good I hope?"

Rose passed champagne to Serena and Bernie. She knocked one back herself and put her finger to her lips and raised her shoulders as if to ask them to keep quiet.

"Oh yes, all good." She winked, "I hear we have something in common." Rose stated.

Serena looked confused, as did Bernie. She loved her friend to bits but Rose could be a bit, well, Rose.

"Oh yeah?" Bernie said as she sipped her drink.

"Oh yes, indeed, a mutual distaste for a certain arsehole that used to be married to our wonderful Serena."

Bernie smiled and nodded, "Newly subscribed member of the club."

"Well it's about time you met the president of the club." Rose held out her hand for Bernie to shake. Serena laughed heartily.

She turned to Bernie, "Rose, threw me a divorce party."

Bernie laughed, she liked Rose, she could see why Serena and Rose were good friends.

"Drink up." Rose encouraged as she switched their empty glasses for full ones and winked. She beckoned someone over from the other side of the foyer, "Becky can you hold the fort. I need to seat my VIP's." again she winked. Bernie looked at Serena and raised her eyebrows. Rose picked up a flute of orange juice for herself and gave it a look of distain as she ushered for them to follow her through a set of doors to a huge ball room.

The room was decorated in black white and silver. It was tasteful and elegant. An orchestra was set up in the corner and were playing; to Bernie's knowledge, Strauss. There were about 8 round tables set out for 10 places each. Around the room a few people had started to settle at the tables. Rose was wearing a look to say she was very pleased with herself indeed. Bernie leaned into Serena, "Um, how much were the tickets to this shindig?"

Serena turned and placed a kiss to Bernie's cheek, "Does it matter?"

Bernie looked at her as if to confirm it didn't. She had been some posh diners in her time in the military and this looked like it would be up there with the best of them.

Rose turned to them, "Right, we need to decide where you are going to sit. The last time I did a seating plan it went severely tit's up so now I leave it to fate." She threw her hands up. "I'm going to throw you two a lifeline, due to my nosey nature I know who is at all of the tables." She laughed.

"You never bloody change do you?"

"You would not have me any other way."

Serena rubbed her friend's arm, "So where shall we sit?"

"Honestly, you guys need to hit an empty table, all these early arrivals are dull as dishwater and here for the free booze."

"Erm, we arrived early to guzzle free fizz on your command."

"Yes because I did not want to spend the next hour pretending to like our local counsellors and city bigwigs. You are here to help me, that is quite different" With that three more glasses arrived on a tray Rose passed fresh glasses to her guests and took the third herself. Serena wondered if she had a secret sign language for her staff. She would have to ask and see if she could pick up pointers.

They drifted towards a table and the three settled in seats. Bernie was still a little in awe at how they had ended up here, getting VIP treatment, "Um, Rose, are you OK spending all this time with us; I mean you are working aren't you?" Bernie queried.

"Darling, I put little stars next to your names which means you get the very best treatment; so if that means the event's manager personally attends to you it is a cross I have to bear."

Serena and Rose laughed loud. Bernie suspected this was not the first time they had pulled this stunt. "I shall ensure I vet all those that enter and send only the best to this table."

"Much appreciated mon ami. Now remind me where the ladies are." Serena patted Rose's hand.

"Side door to the left darling."

Bernie felt a little nervous being left with the unpredictable force of Rose, Serena's oldest friend.

Serena left the table and placed a chaste kiss to Bernie's lips. Bernie watched as she walked across the room to the side exit.

Rose looked at Bernie, "I didn't believe it until I saw it. You really make my Serena happy. I can tell."

Bernie nodded her head up, "I try."

"Well I've never seen her like this so it looks like you are doing quite well."

"Well I love her so," She shrugged, "It's easy."

"You look after my girl OK?" Rose stated as she finished her glass. "I better do a little bit of work now. Have fun today and stick any drinks on my tab alright."

Bernie gave a confused look.

"I've pointed you out to my staff. Go and get whatever drinks you want. All covered OK." At that Rose stood up and squeezed Bernie's arm as she left.

"Thank you Rose, lovely to meet you."  
"And you too." Rose suddenly motioned to her staff and several waitresses fell in line with more drinks on trays, the woman certainly ran a tight ship; or hotel; as it were.

Serena returned to the table to see Bernie sitting drinking her champagne alone, "Where's Rose?"

"Oh she had to go do a little bit of work." Bernie winked, "You want another drink?"

"Are you trying to get me drunk Major?"

Bernie pulled a face and shook her head, "Not at all, I just can't drink any more fizz, was thinking a bottle of red."

Serena smiled as Bernie stood and made her way to the bar.

Just then her thoughts of Bernie were interrupted by a familiar voice calling out to her. Inwardly she prayed that she was imagining things, but no… it was real… Imelda Cousins was making a beeline for her table.


	56. Chapter 59

Imelda was approaching with a young man in a tuxedo. Serena assumed this was her son, as he was about Elinor's age. That is unless she got herself a toy boy, but somehow she doubted it. But then who would have thought that Serena would end up falling in love with a woman, Bernie at that.

Bernie was returning from the bar to see that two people had joined their table. Serena was talking with the woman. It seemed like she knew her. Bernie carried on over to the table with the wine.

Serena was glad that Bernie was back, strength in numbers, especially when it came to Imelda. There was something she just didn't trust about the woman.

"Ah Imelda, this is Major Berenice Wolfe, consultant Trauma Surgeon and my co lead on AAU."

Bernie held out her hand to shake Imelda's hand. She was a little taken back that Serena had introduced her professionally, rather than in the capacity in which they were there. "Bernie." She smiled.

"Bernie this is Imelda, an old work colleague."

Bernie got it now, she gathered that Serena was not necessarily a fan of Imelda, especially given the sugary sweet way in which they were talking to each other.

"Pleasure. Nice to finally put a face to the name." Imelda said. Sensing Bernie's confusion. "My ex-husband knows your husband."

Bernie nodded, "Also ex-husband." She held up her hand to show no wedding ring.

Imelda nodded, she knew that must be a new development but did not say anything. She wondered why Serena and Bernie were on a Boxing Day lunch together. Was it their version of a Christmas do or was it that they were both alone at Christmas.

"The young man at the bar is my son, Tom."

"Ah, thought you might have yourself a toy boy." Serena mused as she took her seat and poured a large glass of wine for herself and Bernie.

Imelda laughed, "Far too old for that carry on."

Tom came over with the drinks and Imelda did quick introductions. They were sitting and chatting and more people joined their table as the time for the meal approached.

Serena was asking Tom what he did for a living as Rose came back to the table put down a tray of empty champagne flutes, putting her arms around Serena and Bernie. "How are my favourite couple?" Then darted off when her name was called.

Imelda looked stunned, Serena smiled and Bernie simply beamed. The woman looked winded.

"Mum, pick your jaw up will you." Tom laughed.

Imelda drained her drink and made her excuse to go to the bar.

Tom leaned over and patted Serena's arm, "Not many people can render my mother speechless." He tipped his head. Her gaydar is not as good as mine; I had you two sussed the second I got back from the bar."

Serena smiled and creased her forehead, "Sometimes it takes one to spot one." Tom laughed.

Serena leaned in and laughed, "Does she know?"

Tom gave them both a shrewd look, "You saw how she reacted to you and you are acquaintances."

Bernie gave Tom a sad smile, she knew what it was like to hide her true self from those closest to her.

"Is she OK with, um, you know." Bernie ventured.

"Gays?" Tom offered. Bernie smiled and nodded.

"Not sure. Not been brave enough to ask yet. Maybe we will find out today." Tom smiled.

Serena gave him a wink, now Imelda knew she was not going to hide the fact that Bernie was more than just her work colleague. She had been stupid not to introduce Bernie as her partner, but it was the first time this had happened and she did not know it would happen so suddenly so she went into autopilot.

The rest of the people on their table seemed to know each other and so they were not obliged to make small talk with strangers; which pleased Bernie no end.

Serena leaned over and placed a chaste kiss to Bernie's cheek as Imelda returned with a pint for Tom and what looked like two strong G&T's for her.

"So Serena, you're a dark horse. Why didn't you introduce Bernie as your girlfriend? Worried I would be prudish about it?"

Serena placed her hand on Bernie's, "Sorry Imelda, it's still kind of new to me, just getting used to it to be honest." She squeezed Bernie's hand and gave her a smile and a wink. Imelda laughed, "I must admit I was initially shocked, but actually it suits you both."  
"What does?" Bernie asked curiously.

"Being happy and in love." Imelda said simply.

The plates started to come out for the starters. It was all silver service and Rose had actually gone to a lot of effort to get her staff to work in a coordinated manner so that everyone ate their meals at the same time.

Bernie was famished but did not rush her food given the formal surrounding. She had been to more silver service functions than she cared to remember. She knew how to conduct herself when the occasion deserved it. _As for Serena, being classy was a default setting for her._ Bernie ruminated.

The soup was amazing. The bowls were cleared to make way for the main course. Plates were delivered with beef on and then silver service waiters came around with the vegetables. Portions were not shy and everybody ate more than they could probably handle.

Rose came over after the main course; "everyone enjoying?"

"Oh yes," Serena answered, "Not sure I will have room for dessert darling."

"Don't worry, there is a little break before dessert," She bent down to whisper to the group. "Give people a chance to put some money behind the bar." She laughed.

Bernie whispered in Bernie's ear and Serena nodded. Bernie stood, "Excuse me, just going to get some fresh air, I won't be long." She left the table and Tom decided to follow.

"Me too. Wait up Bernie."

Rose was once again summoned and dashed off, "Sorry ladies." She smiled.

Imelda and Serena were now alone, Imelda just had to pry a little, "So Serena, spill."

"Spill?"

"Oh come on. When I saw you a couple of months ago you were cursing your Bernie Wolfe. Correct me if I am wrong."

Serena shrugged. Shook her head laughing, "Ah, yes. Things changed."

"Obviously." Imelda raised an eyebrow. "So how long have you been um, together?"

"Well Bernie returned from the Ukraine a few weeks after you were on the ward, so since then really."

"Ah so the reason you were cursing her was because."

"Because I knew I loved her and she wasn't around. I missed her."

The rest of the evening flew by, with food, laughter, alcohol; lots of alcohol and then dancing.

Tom had pulled his mother up for a dance. For someone several gin's in Imelda was doing quite well. It made Serena want to go up and dance too. Bernie had not offered yet, she was not even sure how Bernie felt about them dancing in public as a couple. Time to test the waters.

"Um, can you dance Major?"

"Of course I can dance, I was in the Army you know." Bernie chuckled quietly.

"Naturally, um, can you lead though?" Serena queried, giving Bernie a look as if to hint that she really would like to dance.

Bernie drained her glass, stood and held her hand out in invitation, "Come on Frauline."

Serena finished her drink and took the proffered hand. They walked hand in hand to the dance floor and then assumed the hold to start dancing. Serena was in her element. Bernie could dance, dance well actually. And yes, she could lead.

"You really like dancing don't you." Bernie commented as she realised that they had danced to 3 songs and it had been wonderful. Serena was smiling and basking in being led around the dancefloor.

"I really do. Not that I ever get much of a chance. How about you?"

Bernie was enjoying it today, she had not really thought about enjoying dancing before, mainly because her previous experiences involved her being led around the floor by another army officer. She did not like the invasion of personal space afforded to them. It was different with Serena, "I um, I am enjoying this very much." She kept it simple as to allow them to focus on continue to enjoy the moment.

"Where did you learn to dance so well?" Serena asked, curious.

"The army, seriously." Bernie laughed, "The number of functions I had to attend they taught us dancing and etiquette etcetera."

"Like finishing school?"

"Well yeah, if you like. Only it was not for women, it was for officers. How to conduct yourself as an army officer in 10 easy steps."

"Well you are a natural." Bernie blushed at Serena's compliment.

"So where did you learn to become such an accomplished dancer?" Bernie was curious. If she was a good dancer so was Serena, because they just fit so well. No stepping on toes, perfect timing; graceful movements.

"Ah, childhood dancer. My parents were always dancers and I spent many an hour at the local palladium. Eventually one decides to join in rather than sit bored."

Bernie pulled an impressed face.

"In fact, I also know how to lead, should the occasion arise."

Bernie gave an enquiring look.

"The number of female dancers always outnumbered the gents. Only the really savvy boys hit on to the fact that getting into dancing in your teens meant you had the pick of the women; so there was always a shortage, meaning one had to be versatile."

Bernie laughed, "Do you want to lead?"

"God no, that was a means to an ends. I don't know about you but this," She moves her hand to motion between the two of them, "This works."

Suddenly there was a tap on Serena's shoulder. Tom had appeared, "May I have the next dance?" Serena smiled as Bernie let Tom cut in. Bernie could see that Imelda was sitting at the table a little worse for wear. She placed a kiss to Serena's cheek and went to the bar.

Tom took hold of Serena and they started to dance.

"I bet this is how you wanted to spend your boxing day, isn't it?" Serena smiled warmly at the young man.

He smiled back, he really was a dashing looking man. "Well, ideally I wanted to spend it with my boyfriend and his family, but Mum's alone so," He shrugged, "Graham has been really good about it, he thinks I should tell my Mum about us, but." He left it hanging.

Serena understood, having done the whole coming out thing very recently. "How long have you been together?"

"Two and a half years."

"And your mum does not suspect, doesn't wonder why you don't bring girlfriends home?"

"She thinks I am career focussed." He laughed. "I want to tell her, I do; but if she takes it badly I don't want it to ruin our relationship."

Serena nodded and rubbed her hand on his back slightly

"Well take it from someone who has just had to do the 'coming out' thing." She paused, "Those that matter won't mind and."

"Those that mind don't matter." Tom finished her sentence. "I am glad you and Bernie were here today. It has made the day more bearable." He tips his head to his mum.

"Ha, I'll take that as a compliment."

He smiled as the song finished, "Thank you Serena."

She thought he meant for the dance, "Thank you Tom."

"No, I mean, you know; the pep talk."

She nodded as they made their way back to the table. Bernie was sitting next to Imelda who was slumped on the table, "Um, I think we need to get this one home; she peaked too soon." They laughed as Tom winked at Serena.


	57. Chapter 60

A/N So my little Berina fans it is with a heavy heart I wrap up this fic. I would rather end it here and start anew (check out my other main fic 'speaking as a friend'). I hope you enjoy this last instalment and have enjoyed this little journey.

thank you for the follows, likes and comments they have meant alot.

Now for the last chapter, enjoy *Sob*

It was a good thing Jason was not home. Neither Serena nor Bernie were that fussed about keeping the noise down. When they had got home they pushed the door open snogging furiously, bumping into things and struggling with jackets and shoes. They went straight upstairs stripping on the way, both desperately wanting to get naked and have some messy drunk sex.

The pleasantries of foreplay were dispensed with in favour of getting straight down to it. In case there was any confusion on Bernie's part this was clarified when Serena pulled a slightly swaying Bernie on to the bed exclaiming, "Fuck me Major."

Bernie was on top humping Serena's thigh, rubbing her wet throbbing core hard against her lover. Her hand had slid down between Serena's legs. _Fuck she's wet._

Bernie pushed two fingers inside of her lover and began to pump in and out in the same rhythm the rest of her body.

Her other hand was holding on to the headboard, supporting her weight. Bernie knew she was very drunk and would be heavy if she rested her full body weight on Serena.

Serena was always very horny when she was pissed and was impressed that Bernie was able to put in such a sterling effort given the amount of Champaign and wine they had put away. Bernie was close to coming and let out grunts with each push as she fucked Serena hard.

Serena had her hands on Bernie's arse, digging her nails in; she had no doubt in the morning Bernie would have several scratches and nail marks on her ass and back.

As Bernie continued her assault she started to speak between grunts.

"Fuck, I never thought I'd love shagging you this much. Ahhhhh!"

"Still can't believe you're my woman, fuck! Oosh!"

"I fucking love you Campbell. Woah!"

Bernie gave a final push as Serena came over her hand; this act caused Bernie to come as she collapsed half resting on Serena, half on the bed.

Serena pulled Bernie in for a passionately messy kiss, "I fucking love you too Major."

They both were breathing deeply as they fell into a drunken slumber, glad that they were on the later shift tomorrow.

They woke to the sound of the alarm the next day. Drunk Serena was always very kind, she did things like set the alarm and ensure there were glasses of water on the bedside table. Bernie stirred and smacked her dry lips together as she rolled out of bed to go to the bathroom. She went to the loo and decided to brush her teeth as Serena came in, picking up her toothbrush and following suit.

She snaked her spare arm around Bernie waist, "Hangover?"

Bernie turned to her, "Surprisingly not," she said as she brushed her teeth, "Just a mouth like the inside of Ghandi's flip flop."

Serena laughed as she brushed her teeth.

"How about you?" Bernie asked.

"I know how to handle my booze." Serena winked as she finished brushing her teeth.

Bernie was now back in bed.

"What are you doing?" Serena enquired.

"Erm, getting back in bed, it's really early yet plus.."

"What?"

"We didn't get our pillow talk last night. I think I kinda passed out asleep on you."

Serena got back into bed realising they had ages before they even had to contemplate getting ready for work, drunk Serena had allowed time for hangover recovery when setting the alarm. She lay facing Bernie, "That you did, but it was sweet."

"Sweet?" Bernie asked.

"Yeah. Bless you, you did fantastically well last night considering we were both as pissed as we were. So no wonder you were knackered." Serena kissed Bernie to show the sincerity of her words.

"So, last night, it was OK; I mean, you know?"

"The drunken shag?"

Bernie smiled, "Yes, the drunken shag. I realise I was not in tip top condition. Tried my best." She mused. "Did you enjoy it?"

Serena smiled and pushed a stray strand of Bernie's head behind her ear, "Whilst I love the intimacy of love making, the odd messy bonk does have its place. I did enjoy it… and I really didn't do a lot. You did all the hard work." Serena pulled a funny face making them both laugh.

"From what I recall you were not exactly a sack of potatoes Serena." Bernie gave her a knowing look as Serena's face changed as it dawned on her what exactly her contribution was.

"Oh god Bernie," She leapt from her position to look at Bernie's back and arse. She gasped as she saw scratch marks and indents of her nails. "Did I hurt you?" She asked in a worried tone.

Bernie smiled. "Someone was marking their territory weren't they?"

Serena looked genuinely horrified.

Bernie shook her head and pulled Serena's lips to hers, "You didn't hurt me, I'm fine. I kinda enjoyed it." She winked as they kissed.

Serena's phone went off. Doctor Who theme. Jason. Serena leaned over Bernie to get her phone off charge. _Good old drunk Serena for putting the phone on charge._

As she leaned over Bernie bought her hands to Serena's hips, brushing over her ticklish parts. Serena answered the phone to Jason with a laugh.

Serena had spoken to Jason, he had asked if it was OK to spend today with Celia again, possibly stop over. Serena asked to speak to Celia's mum as she did not want Jason taking liberties. Turns out Celia's mum loved having Jason around. She was surprising them with a trip to the Pantomime so stopping another night would work just fine.

Serena vowed her New Year resolution would be to have Celia over more. She and Bernie both liked Celia and it seemed unfair that Jason always went to her parents. It would be nice for Celia to come for dinner and be able to stop over, they had the room after all. She made a mental note to mention it when she picked Jason up tomorrow.

The days between Boxing Day and New Year seemed to fly for both Bernie and Serena. If they were not on the same shift their shifts overlapped and AAU was kept very busy with people who decided to maintain their Christmas spirit right through to New Year; with a lot of the accidents coming in being somehow drink related.

It was New Year's Eve and given that they had control of the rota Serena and Bernie decided they wanted to work the same shift; the shift nobody else wanted. The shift they didn't mind, because at least they were together. They walked onto the ward at 930PM ready to relieve those on the late shift knowing that they would want to get down to Albie's pronto.

They entered the office to find a large vase of flowers on the desk. Bernie looked confused as Serena plucked a card from the flowers.

"Dear Serena and Bernie. It was an absolute pleasure to spend Boxing Day with you both. Made me see that love is love. Told Mum about Graham and I. She asked when she needs to buy a hat!

Forever in gratitude, Tom (and Graham) xxx"

"Wow." Bernie said as she took of her coat.

"Seems we inspire the younger generation." Serena gave a laugh.

Bernie went to change into her Trauma scrubs as Serena did the ward rounds with Raf.

"Good Christmas Boss?" He ventured.

"Yes, not too bad."

He looked at her, "Alcohol and family." She smiled, "Always equal drama somewhat." Raf gave an understanding look.

They got through rounds and Raf was out of the doors by 10 a very happy man.

They were kept busy one way or another for the next couple of hours, Bernie went to both Keller and the ED on consults.

The red phone, the blasted red phone, rang about 11.10pm warning of an RTA on the way in. 2 patients referred straight to AAU and the trauma unit.

Serena took one and Bernie the other. When it came to Bernie's patient needing surgery there was only one person she wanted in theatre with her. Serena agreed to scrub in and assist Bernie. She did a quick round beforehand to ensure that the rest of the ward was sound.

As they worked on their patient Serena eyed the clock, it had just gone midnight and the surgery was going well.

"Happy New Year Ms Wolfe." Serena commented.

Bernie looked up and reciprocated with a smile that could be seen through her mask, "Happy New Year Ms Campbell."

The surgery finished and patient wheeled out there was just Bernie and Serena left in the room off the theatre. Bernie was leaning against the sink as Serena washed her hands. "You know this is the place of our first kiss?"

"I do. Certainly not forgotten."

Bernie waited for Serena to dry her hands and did a quick check to see the coast was clear. She pulled Serena to stand in front of her as she stood at ease leaned on the sink and pulled in for a kiss.

The kiss was deep and lingering. First kiss of 2017, Bernie was going to make it count, "Happy New Year darling." She said softly.

"Happy New Year." Serena said with a smile. "This will be our year right."

"Right." Bernie agreed.

Fin.


End file.
